Minisode #067 Triple Kelly's Debut

by iggy



June 22, 2007

Blade's hero is Brother Midnight
Boo Berry's Cousins
Triple Kelly's Debut
WWE refs must now actually referee

#balmy locale #tomfoolery

067 No Old Country Way for Old Men: June 22, 2007

Don with Corn oil for the Iron Sheik
(94 minutes)

Brother Midnight wears no pants, making him Blade's long lost brother.

RD doesn't like Stephanie McMahon. He is completely incorrect regarding this issue.

RD's Trip to the Grocery: Sad News: rumor has it that Kellogg's will purge its cartoon characters. (:17) Blade sings the Yummy Mummy jingle. Also he has some "Big Announcement": He wants to make a bet on when the Colts and Lions play on August 25th.

Co-Host Contest Week 14: (:23) RD is 'stunned' by a woman (Kelly) on the line. She will win this pointless, horrible charade. 12 of 22.

Mail Bag (:35): Seth Drakin (2) thinks the Burger King may be King Pedophile's long lost brother. The Burger King veggie burger sucks. Robert Conrad memories. RD goes into the WC Forum and brings back a question about Wendy Richter from WrestleMania I: Does the Iron Sheik have weird sex habits? (:42) Fabulous Moolah has a very scary action figure.

Obscure Wrestling News (:49): There's a Tribute to RD Reynolds on Youtube. The Crickets have a Myspace page. Lord Alfred offers free balling. His daughter contacted Blade recently. Years ago, the Blue Meanie was involved with WrestleCrap.com. He is now selling Meanie sauce. (:55)

WSX has stripped its only champion of his belt despite not having made an episode for many months. (:58) The Zombie is back in the ring. (:62) TNA's complexity is killing itself. (:66) RD starts talking about Mark Twain for some reason.

WWE has ordered referees to not act like buffoons, which involves fining them. (:70) Candice Michelle has a small nose. ECW got the Boogeyman. (:76) Blade's friend Don (who likes beating off with corn oil) does not believe they kill off actual live worms. (:78) This is an excuse as any to remember American Starship Eagle and Coyote. Rumors abound that the Iron Sheik may be on TV, which is an excuse for RD to play sound clips. (:83) Interminable Raw.

Seventeen Big Syllables:
Big Steph's in the house.
Oops, sorry, meant to say she's
as big as a house.
 
 
 
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • The Brother to my Midnight, Mr. Blade Braxton
  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 4. Global Internet, AngryMarks.com, WrestleCrap DVD Rom, Meanie Sauce
  • URLs not taken: 1. ChuckWooleryPullsAChain.com
  • SPEAKING OFs: 14. Fascinating, beating off with corn oil, making a porno movie, proud sponsors of WrestleCrap Radio, madness from things you get at the grocery store, fellow crappers, folks, battery and like battery acid, things that won’t fly, reverse licenses to print money, the Rubix cube of wrestling, people obsessed with anuses, things that are no longer funny, evil witches
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • Outdated references: 4. Kentucky Fried Movie, Chuck Woolerly, Love Connection, Robert Conrad
  • I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.

  • F-Bombs: 7. Blade, Blade, Blade, Blade, Blade, Blade, Blade

  • Blade Burps: 1
  • Krankor Laughs: 2
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 1
  • WrestleCrap Gongs: 2
  • Zombie Growls: 2
 
  • Shelly Martinez References: 3
 
  • Mailbag
    • Seth Drakin (2): I know you've talked about King Pedophile and the Crackhead Boo Berry. What are your thoughts on the King from Burger King? What would happen if he popped up out of the blue like a stalker and he gave you one of the Burger King's meals? Would you either a) take his gift and don't bother with him stalking you, b) call the police and have the guy arrested, or would you beat and maim the bastard till he goes away once and for all? Inquiring minds want to know! No sold.

  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku:
    Big Steph's in the house.
    Oops, sorry, meant to say she's
    as big as a house.

Minisode #066 Debut of the Draftrolla

by iggy



June 15, 2007

Vince was blown up.
The Draftrolla debuts
Taco Bell Pete
Vampire nipples
Coffin Kitten
Mickie James found riders for her ponies.

#Target 631 #silver dollar city

066 Rest In Pieces, McMahon: June 15, 2007

Rest In Pieces, McMahon (The 2007 WCR Draft)
(79 minutes)

Sad News: Vince McMahon's limo exploded. Even Sadder News: RD does not want a 12 foot penis.

RD's "Trip" to the Grocery (:13): a toothbrush that plays music. Blade's bad Miss Elizabeth impersonation.

WWE sends WCHQ the Draftrolla. (:13)

Draft #1: Rob Conway drafted to Burger King. Imagine the slogan.

Co-Host Contest Week 13: awful. Chris "Krankor" Waters (:22) and Travie "Journey" Yak (:26) deliver McMahon eulogies. 11 of 21.

#2 Tatanka (Buffalo) drafted to the Big Wampum Casino. (:32) Shane and Pat Patterson walk into a bar...

Mail Bag: some question the validity of the news that Vince has died.

#3 Justin Credible drafted to Target. (:37) RD used to write for Fighting Spirit magazine.

Obscure Wrestling News: "Our favorite Big Nippled Vampire" Areola wants be called Coffin Kitten. (:45) The Co-Hosts want to give other bad names to her instead. Candice Michelle bondage pics on the internet. (:49) Blade and RD are at their best when they talk about pornography. Batman's Robin's Burt Ward (and his large penis) will appear at an indy show. (:52) Sid Vicious wants back in WWE.

Horsetrolla: Mickie James' box was flooded. (:54) Francine is taking orders for custom girl on girl matches on DVD. (:62)

#4 Robecca DiPietro drafted to Francine's new video company. (:68)

Seventeen Syllables That Do Not Come with Fire Extinguisher As Illustrated:
Rest in Peace, Vinny.
Sadly, your grapefruits were not
fire-retardant.
 
 
 
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. Global Internet, AngryMarks.com, WrestleCrap.com DVD-Rom
  • URLs not taken: 0.
  • SPEAKING OFs: 13. Shirt one, shirt (2), Verne Gagne masturbating, Scott Hall’s pubic hair, beating of with corn oil, nipples (3), men that are giant, men who aren’t dead but their careers are, tardy
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • Outdated references: 4. Bee Gees, Press Your Luck, Burt Ward, Bobcat Goldwaidt
  • I didn’t even know he was sick: 1. Jeep Swenson

  • Krankor Laughs: 4
  • Weird Al Laughs: 2
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 2
  • WrestleCrap Gongs: 1
  • You’re Hurtin' Me Randy!: 1
 
  • Mickie James References: 5
  • Shelly Martinez References: 6
 
  • Mailbag: N/A

  • Draft Picks
    • Rob Conway to Burger King
    • Tatanka to Big Wampum Casino (Sioux Falls, SD)
    • Justin Credible to Target Store #631 (Poughkeepsie, NY)
    • Rebecca DePetro to Francine’s Video Company

  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku:
    Rest in Peace, Vinny.
    Sadly, your grapefruits were not
    fire-retardant.
 

Minisode #065 Remembering Miss Elizabeth

by iggy



June 1, 2007

X13D Doritos
Jeff Foxworthy Beef Jerky
Miss Elizabeth's Granny Panties
Blade's Miss Elizabeth impersonation
RVD Concussion Syndrome

#but don't #fish out of water mouth

065 RVD Concussion Syndrome: June 1, 2007

Same Feeling As Listening To This Show
RVD Concussion Syndrome
(84 minutes)

Blade is a member of the Raw fan nation. Blade walked into a slanted ceiling. Those two incidents are (hopefully) not related.

Blade: "Not like me slurring in this show is an alien concept."

Blade's Trip to the Grocery (:12): Hamburger Doritos X-13D have an 'interesting' Big Mac flavor, particularly when combined with Diet Coke Plus. Jeff Foxworthy beef jerky is best eaten naked. "But don't!" Blade's eating sounds like a horse's.

Co-Host Contest Week 12: geeks, nerds, and poindexters. (:21) Chris Engler has one question about the Big Show while playing the WWE Roleplaying Game. 9 of 19. RD promises to put the too-long Contest out of its misery in July.

Mail Bag: (:32) Raging Demons is worried about Kane and May 19th. RD has caught up with 2003 by getting a Myspace page. Ultimate Kennedy (2) thinks Trish Stratus is today's current "poontang ATM". (:38) Blade responds with his bad Miss Elizabeth impersonation. [The first of many.] Blade saw Gorgeous George stripping.

Obscure Wrestling News (:44): Jimmy Hart, throwback UHF channel movie host. Blade reminisces about some Kansas City Chiefs Announcer doing bad horror jokes. Extreme's Play with Me, the WCR intro, will be on Guitar Hero '80s Edition. Goldust no-showed a tribute show for Bad News Brown. (:54) Sad News: Aereola was fired because Vince was once again behind the times. (:57) Scotty 2 Hotty was fired after sixteen years with WWE...which was something they mentioned last week. This show sure is repetitive. Also it's Krankor's birthday. (His birthday wish is for his weapons to be effective against that Prince of Space so he will be a horrible example for anyone who opposes him.)

The WrestleCrap Archive will be available on DVD-ROM soon. (:66) The WrestleCrap Carnival Wrestling Show idea looks remarkably similar to the upcoming Saturday Night Main Event. (:68)

Another WWE draft is scheduled despite the fact that any wrestler can go to any show at any time for no reason. (:70) One Night Stand pudding match. (:72) Blade responds with his bad Bill Cosby impression. [The first of many.] RVD concussion syndrome is very entertaining, particularly when it causes symptoms of looking hypnotized while moving your mouth blandly like Billy Bass. (:75)

Tribute to My New Favorite Wrestler:
RVD's concussed.
He got kicked in his dome. Man,
I'm feeling woozy.
 
 
 
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • The con to my -cussion, Mr. Blade Braxton
  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. Global Internet, AngryMarks.com, WrestleCrap Book of Lists
  • URLs not taken: 0.
  • SPEAKING OFs: 5. Hulk Hogan doing a horrible rap, pants, pants or lack thereof, Ludwig Borga, licenses to print money, things I don’t understand
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • Outdated references: 18. Naked Gun, Reggie Jackson, Jeff Foxworthy, Little House on the Prairie, Big Wheel (2), Eazy-E, Big Wheel (3), MySpace (7), Dan Quayle, Murphy Brown, Tim Conway, Mother From Good Times
  • I didn’t even know he was sick: 1. Krankor

  • F-Bombs: 4. Blade, Blade, Blade, Blade

  • RD Time Outs: 1
  • Krankor Laughs: 3
  • Weird Al Laughs: 1
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 2
  • WrestleCrap Gongs: 4
  • Cricket Chirps:
  • You’re Hurtin' Me Randy!: 3
  • GGG Bombs: 3
 
  • Trish Stratus References: 4
  • Shelly Martinez References: 5
 
  • Mailbag
    • Raging Demons: OK I've got a question for you. Since we're in the month of May, are you afraid that if you or Blade say May 19th, that Kane will show up and kick your asses? I've been saying May 19th all month and so far no Kane. No sold.
    • Ultimate Kennedy (2): A few weeks ago on your show you and Blade both talked about Miss Elizabeth's poontang shooting out $100 bills. The question is if Trish Stratus could do this would you then stalk her? No sold.

  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku:
    RVD's concussed.
    He got kicked in his dome. Man,
    I'm feeling woozy.