Minisode #050 The Chocolate Spoon

by iggy



January 26, 2007

Rachel Ray posed for FHM
"Passions" was canceled.
Book your Valentine's Day dinner at White Castle.
Introducing the Co-Host Contest

#Emerson Avenue #perm juice

050 King Kong Bundy: Komedian!: January 26, 2007

King Kong Bundy: Komedian!
(66 minutes)

A new promotion called WSX is about to make its debut on MTV. Because when you think MTV, you of course think professional wrestling.
Blade: "It makes me want to grab a monkey and sit on the street corner dressed like Al Capone."

In 2003, Rachel Ray posed in the kitchen for FHM. Sad News: RD's favorite show Passions, a soap opera, is being canceled. (:04)

RD's Trip down Emerson Avenue (:10): White Castle is taking reservations for Valentine's Day.

Both the Co-Host Contest music and the WrestleCrap Radio Gong debut. RD predicts that the Contest will be a trainwreck. (:26)

RD announces that Lance Storm will be a guest on WrestleCrap Radio. Blade remembers when they had to cut out a piece of the Co-Hosts being absolutely filthy on April Hunter a week before the Vince Russo interview.

Speaking of trainwrecks, Obscure Wrestling News: King Kong Bundy has started a stand-up comedy career. (:30) Sad News: Dirty Dick Slater was arrested for violating a restraining order to cut off contact from the girlfriend he stabbed in 2003. (:35)

STILL DIRTY
Mail Bag (:40): Mike Polin wanted Lanny Poffo to make an appearance in 90's WWF rather than just collect a paycheck from WCW for doing nothing. Blade thinks Poffo's 'perm juice' would have made for a good in-ring weapon.

Bam Bam Bigelow died. (:48) RD gave Blade a shirt from the first Survivor Series.

Blade tells of his favorite Royal Rumble. The episode is deemed a "trainwreck" and would have been gonged if it were a contestant.

Seventeen Syllables:
The Royal Rumble.
Every man for himself. Sounds
like a circle jerk.
 
 
 
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • The Marty Jannetty to my Shawn Michaels, Mr. Blade Braxton
  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Global Internet, White Castle
  • URLs not taken: 0.
  • SPEAKING OFs: 11. Crap (2), vulgarity, White Castle l, girls that wouldn’t go to White Castle for Valentines Day, theme songs, sitting on a MJ entry and dancing the Charleston, trainwrecks, King Kong Bundy’s colon, restraining orders and violating them, bad jokes
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • Outdated references: 3. Pat Summerall, Neil Diamond, The Gong Show
  • I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.
 
  • Weird Al Laughs: 2
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  1
  • Other Laughs:
  • WrestleCrap Gongs: 8

  • Mailbag
    • Mike Polin: Do you guys think that the Genius gimmick could have gotten over around 1995/1996 when Vince was doing all the horrible mid-90s gimmicks? Yes.

  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Royal Rumble tagline is homoerotic no?
    The Royal Rumble.
    Every man for himself. Sounds
    like a circle jerk.
 

Minisode #049 "Something to Say" for the First Time

by iggy



January 19, 2007

"American Idol" Birthday Ice Cream
Blade uses a joke book from the '60s.

#sack of cornfeed #brenda brakestown

049 I have something to say...: January 19, 2007

I have something to say...
(97 minutes)

The Lions suck, so Blade must recite many listener-submitted insults. Blade fights back with an insult book printed in 1965.

[One particular limerick Blade had to say made me laugh the most (:24):
Hello, my name is Blade,
A really stupid wager I made.
Luckily I didn't ask
To caress the Deal's ass
'Cause God knows, I need to get laid.

-Future PB]

The manuscript of the WrestleCrap Book of Lists has been completed. Pick it up in the Fall.

RD's Trip to the Grocery (:10): American Idol ice cream sucks. Birthday cake ice cream tastes like feces.

Obscure Wrestling News: The Warlord signed a Jakks deal. (:25) Ivan Koloff is now licensed to conduct wedding ceremonies but does not provide "cake location." (:34) The Iron Sheik got drunk again. Monte Brown will be called Marcus Cor Von in WWE. (:48)

Blade and RD go through the list of potential WWE Hall of Fame inductees for many, many minutes. (:58) At close to 40 minutes long this is by far the most they've ever spent [or ever will spend] talking about an actual wrestling subject.

Seventeen Syllables from Our Fellow Crappers:
Detroit Lions stink.
Demolition weren't that good.
I like to eat poop.
 
 
 
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

Blade: "I think Erik Majorwitz, Erik Majorwitz should be the next co-host, but it probably would take me took long to get the money to call Germany."

 

  • The big loser to my big winner, Mr. Blade Braxton
  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. Global Internet, Chic-fil-A, NyQuil
  • URLs not taken: 1. PoonTangAPlenty.com
  • SPEAKING OFs: 7. The Lions, fascinating, Jon Thomas, Mr. Fuji leading them in song, Verne Gagne, Sherri Martel
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • Outdated references: 2. Buck Owens, Teddy Ruxpin
  • I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.
 
  • F-Bombs: 1. Blade
 
  • I have something to say: 25
  • Krankor Laughs: 7
  • Weird Al Laughs: 2

  • Mickie James References: 3
  • Ken Patera References: 2
 
  • Mailbag: N/A

  • Say a name, Hall of Fame?
  • Both say yes: 18. Von Erichs, Jake “The Snake” Roberts, Ultimate Warrior, “Macho Man” Randy Savage, Honky Tonk Man, The Original Sheik, King Curtis Iaukea, Howard Finkel, “Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase, Mr. Fuji, Nick Bokwinkel, Mummgamad Ali, Mr. T, Dusty Rhodes, Bon Uecker, Rocky Johnson, Wild Samoans, Bob Backlund
  • Both say no: 3. Dick Ebersol, The Bushwackers, Big Boss Man
  • RD no, Blade yes: 4. Ric Flair (active wrestlers should be ineligible), Ken Patera, Rick Rude, Brooklyn Brawler
  • Hogan picks: 9. Von Erichs, King Curtis Iaukea, Howard Finkel, Rick Rude, Wild Samoans, Big Boss Man, The Bushwackers, Dusty Rhodes, “Macho Man” Randy Savage


  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku:
    Detroit Lions stink.
    Demolition weren't that good.
    I like to eat poop.

Minisode #048 All about Khali

by iggy



January 12, 2007

RD sings Queen
Khali's promo
Khali's teeth

#earful #Snoopy

048 Andre the Giant...Drunkard: January 12, 2007

Andre the Giant...Drunkard
(79 minutes)

The majority of work on the new book will be done in three days. The two earlier books did mega business over in Canada for some reason.

RD sings some Freddy Mercury. Speaking of getting your nuts split...RD says, "Whenever I think of the testicles to take care of me, I think of you, Mr Braxton."

RD decides to hold a contest to look for a fill-in co-host, (:18) in the case that either of them might not be able to record an episode, which makes sense...until you remember that most of the time if neither of them makes it then no show is recorded in the first place. [Still, speaking of ideas that were good at the time...]

WCR is up for voting for an award at http://wrestlingradioawards.com/. Give them a vote if you want.

Obscure Wrestling News (:25): War of words with the Warrior on eBay. Assy McGee has sued Mr McMahon's Kiss My Ass.

Blade hits the bottle segment is canceled because Blade's resolution is to not drink alcohol. RD proposes the Drunktrolla.
Never get involved in a
drinking war with Andre.

Modern Drunkard has an article about Andre the Giant, (:34) who drank 7000 calories worth of booze per day. Once he drank 119 twelve-ounce beers in six hours before passing out.

Mail Bag (:43): RD admits that he renamed this segment months ago so that he wouldn't have to hand out prizes. Blade named his penis Blad the Impaler. He also lost his football bet. Matt in Nashville has a suggestion about classic stories. Chris thinks Balls Mahoney should be renamed Enlarged Testicles. (:51)

At New Year's Revolution, Blade held up a sign behind Jim Ross that read, Mickie, Lift the Tail!!!. (:53) Khali can't speak well. (What do you expect from a man with teeth the size of thumbnails?) Umaga is headlining Raw.

Seventeen Syllables of This Week's HOTT HOTT Wrestling Haiku:
Rosie and Donald.
The bitch ate a fudge whale, the
match sucked Moby's Dick.
 
 
 
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • The Rosie to my Donald, Mr. Blade Braxton
  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. Global Internet, Modern Drunkard Magazine, moderndrunkardmagazine.com
  • URLs not taken: 0.
  • SPEAKING OFs: 9. Getting your nuts split, the savior of the universe, trademarking things, which, naming penises, strange, doomsday, Moby’s dick, dick
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 1. Umaga looking like Snoopy
  • Outdated references: 5. Flash Gordon, Queen, Freddie Mercury, Dick Clark, Vanilla Ice
  • I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.
 
  • Krankor Laughs: 3
  • Weird Al Laughs: 1
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  1
  • Other Laughs: 1

  • Trish Stratus References: 4
  • Tammy Sytch References: 2
  • Mickie James References: 5
 
  • Mailbag
    • Matt in Nashville: Dear Big Deal Reynolds and Double Bladed Braxton, the question is why don't you ever talk about classic crap on the show? A segment on that every show would be a neat addition. Jed Shaffer's new segment is great. Also since Detroit lost on Sunday, since I was born in Kansas, could we get Blade to sing Somewhere Over The Rainbow? That's not the worst idea.
    • Chris: RD, BLADE (now spelled in all caps), for the sake of political correctness, should we start calling Balls Mahoney Enlarged Testicles? That's a good question.

  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku:
    Rosie and Donald.
    The bitch ate a fudge whale, the
    match sucked Moby's Dick.