Episode 8: Holy Diamante!: September 19, 2021

Rats Like Cheese
"When Mr. Freeze kidnaps a baseball player to make Batman surrender himself in exchange for his revenge, the Caped Crusader agrees to do so."
82 minutes

RD Is Cheering for Mr. Freeze, and he has a "tremendous" Batman and Joker surfing shirt. For some reason Vince's name is now the newly renamed ChannelAttitude.com, and he is wearing a sleeveless shirt to show off his inked arms. 

Vince requests his Co-Bro for some background on Mr. Freeze, of whom RD is Cheering for. RD debates the necessity for canon for fictional works ([insert franchise of choice here]), but in the "normal" version of events as derived from the Animated Series he is trying to rescue his wife Nora through his criminal activity. This Freeze is much different, enough that Vince spoonerisms him as "Timber-Me-Shivers". (Now why wasn't he one of his henchmen?)

Here all of a sudden we have Batman causing Freeze's condition through throwing anti-freeze at him sometime before this episode because apparently that's how such things work. (:05) Vince wonders why they couldn't have spent more of the backstory on the previous episode, and even then the information here is shaky. RD counters that the series was unrelated to the comics overall of the time. But he double checks to protect himself from the geeks, nerds, and poindexters.

Vince also wonders of the episode's weird title. RD reminds him it was spoken by his beloved Princess Sandra, Formerly Sandra Karlson from Brooklyn. He has no idea why he wrote 37 pages of notes.

Anyway, the summation of the previous episode clearly shows the Dynamic Duo's stunt doubles, including the role of Robin now being played by Steve Carrell. (:10) Vince has questions, and this is coming from a guy who oversaw WCW Thunder. RD has to remind him they were not planning for in-depth analysis 55 years later. 

Also we start with random street shots before cutting to a hospital at "midnight...at the Super Hypotherm Deicifier Chamber Mark 7!" Vince asks RD to apologize for missing the police may have saved the frozen Duo. RD thinks it was the Fire Department. (:13) He thinks the two lying frozen on a table reminds him of his old dog Piper relaxing in the sun. 

The attending police officers then randomly mocking the medical attendant named...Vince. He responds with overacting which RD demonstrates.

RD had also noted Gordon praying for "two magnificent specimens of manhood" for your consideration. Vince turns a thawing nob, and the first thing the suddenly dry Duo do is shake each other's hands. O'Hara: "SAINTS BE PRAISED!"

A displeased Mr. Freeze is left to brood in his antarctic lair in the middle of summer. (:20) He threatens Batman to "die...die...DIE!!!". Or he's just saying the German "the" for some reason. Vince wonders if Sanders used this to audition for The Jungle Book and have another take his place. 

Vince knows they next have footage in Dodgers Stadium. The Narrator gushes over the beauty of Princess Sandra, Formerly Sandra Karlson from Brooklyn, about to throw the first pitch. RD admits she has improved her standing in his eyes to a mediocre 5 Batpoles. Vince: "I thought she looked very good." Bruce and folks are there in attendance as she talks about her desire to meet the Duo, "socially of course!" Dick gives Bruce an extremely small package...of peanuts, and Bruce rudely throws the shells on the floor. Vince wished he would have put them in the bag instead. 

Suddenly we hear one of the players, Diamante, is missing "due to reasons". Cue other henchman "Boo" to suddenly skywrite: "Three strikes you're out Batman!" Cue the group having to leave for a "board meeting". Vince would have preferred a distracting scuffle over a foul ball instead.

Freeze calls the police to gloat while the Duo are present and to offer his captured player in exchange for Batman and a 1st round pick: "I don't vant even a mark!" Batman: "Diamante is the idol of millions of impressionable young lads who look up to him. HE MUST LIVE to inspire the youth of today who will become the men of tomorrow!" Vince gives him applause. 

Batman goes off on his own to Freeze. Robin returns to the Batcave where Alfred mixes up giving him tea with a parfait. Mrs. Deal had to remind her husband that he used the wrong name for her the English use "tea" more to reference afternoon snacking rather than just the drink itself. Robin admits he planted a tracking device on his chum, leaving him to be super excited by eating some dessert without Bruce being around to make fun of him. (:35)

Batman shows up at a poorly shot office complex for the trade where he's knocked out and thrown into Freeze's helicopter. When Robin shows up, the Co-Bros are confused by the "ill fitting" sweat pants he is wearing for some reason, perhaps because he stained his tights. 

Freeze holds Batman in a beef locker with the meat still within it. RD wonders why Freeze keeps the rest of his abode at 76 degrees (Fahrenheit...I hope). (:40) RD lives in 70, Vince lives in 72. He relates how in Florida retirement homes they are around 80 degrees in the summer due to saving costs by not using air conditioning. Thus Freeze is of retirement age or thinks others are Florida retirees. Or he's just a jerk. Sadly the temperature is too cold for Batman to fully fight or act against "Cold Fish" Freeze who is waiting to see how his mood will be before he further acts. The Co-Bros express sympathy for his cold plight and making Batman thus know how it feels. So of course Batman doesn't apologize. 

Anyway, Freeze also kidnaps Robin to have for dinner (with Batman). (:46) Freeze states he can put wine into whatever temperature he wants. RD wonders how he could eat or drink frozen or iced stuff then. Freeze then asks for Batman's apology for putting him in his state, of which RD is Cheering for. Of course instead Batman attacks: "We can get you some medical help." Freeze: "IN PRISON?" Robin: "I slipped on the Baked Alaska."

Batman gets Freeze with a punch to the face "right on the button" with the help of "super thermal be long underwear", leaving bare his face. RD wonders if that was the case why he didn't do anything earlier. Vince thinks his smelling the Baked Alaska messed with his head. 

The rest of the fight is boring until Robin finds and pushes a stuffed polar bear on wheels at the grouping. O'Hara doesn't even give an excuse for the police's late show, further proof of Gordon secretly interfering for his own nefarious ends. 

Everyone end parties at a hotel instead of the Stately Wayne Manor, as Diamante reunites with his date Princess Sandra, Formerly Sandra Karlson from Brooklyn, while carrying a baseball. (:57) RD complains that she also had her eye on Bruce as everyone expresses disgust at the Baked Alaska. 

Vince searches for Baked Alaska through a screen share. (:59) RD has to guide his Co-Bro into doing an image search, which is further confused by his using Yahoo instead of Google. 

Vince was most impressed by Freeze and his performance as a villain so far even if gets his name wrong. RD agrees with him. "How did that man not win an Emmy for this?" he asks in all seriousness. The two wonder if they put him in the prison meat locker. 

The two have no memory of next week's villain Zelda the Great, other than the usual jokes nowadays about a certain game series. (:66) Vince goes to "The Google" to check and ends up at a Wikipedia entry. He then looks through some random images. 

RD reiterates with Vince that Freeze is technologically savvy. Vince wonders why his plan for revenge would be complicated with other stuff. RD reminds who is complaining about complexity in storylines before he starts his shilling. (:71) His latest induction is on the now closed WWE Niagara Falls that he once visited to buy a cup from.


  • Special Guest Villain: Mr. Freeze (George Sanders)

 

  • SPEAKING OFs: 1. Germans
  • Screen Shares: 2. Vince, Vince
  • URLs not taken: 1. VinceRussosNotABadLookingBroad.com

Episode 7: Holy Wunderbar!: September 12, 2021

Instant Freeze
"Dr. Shivel aka Mr. Freeze has returned and is seeking revenge on Batman, who accidentally spilled a freeze solution on him, being forced to live in a -50 climate. He is committing crimes involving diamonds, or "ice," in different forms. He freezes the duo, who look like goners."
92 minutes

RD is Less Boring than Mr. Freeze. Like Vince I disagree. RD is glad this episode wasn't the first as he found it terrible. Like Vince I disagree.

Vince finds it weird that he thought it would be a different actor playing Mr. Freeze than the one we get today. RD finds it weird that it was more action than camp today. Both liked that they started with action though, in this case at an ice rink with a looping scream and a motorcycle cop: "some kook melted the ice skating rink!" says someone in a "Gotham" accent. 

Vince has no idea why villains need to do something outlandish to get Batman's attention when just a simple crime will do. (:08)

The motorcycle cop chases a truck for "Amalgamated Ice Cream" causing RD to consult a dictionary. Mr. Freeze stops the cop by freezing the road. Vince continues to wonder why Batman would need to be consulted anyway for the act of flamethrowing an ice rink. RD likens it to if anything happened to his video store. He also reminds him it was Gordon who made the call.

Vince segues to his time between WCW and TNA where he ran a seedy CD warehouse and hired someone because he gave him a business card for "Dawgman". He once chased a teenage shoplifter in a truck while leaving the shop unattended. (:12) RD was concerned he would shoot him.

For the first time we get some background on a villain, even if he is a "diabolical snowman" (:20). This is done in a police station with only 3 other unkempt looking police officers including O'Hara. Attitude Era WWF banned facial hair according to Vince like a reverse theocracy. (McMahon DID try to book a match against God after all.)

This time Bruce and a quite excited Dick are talkin' baseball (and Holy Koufax) (:23). Alfred loudly announces the Batphone calling right near some civilian players without coding it. Bruce responds by having to go for his date and a "teenage girl" for Dick. Vince thought Bruce was wearing a odd hairpiece. 

Cut to showing Mr. Freeze in an astronaut suit. George Sanders was the original Shere Khan in The Jungle Book. Despite it being one of his top three favorite movies Vince mistakes him for voicing Kaa. 

Batman: "Well poor devil!...He probably wants some kind of dividend."

Apparently he was the one who caused the suit due to throwing anti-freeze at him in a lab fight. Between this and originally being named Mr. Zero it's a wonder an animated series of all things 25 years later finally gave him his due (and Mark Hamill his first step to becoming the Joker).

The police have no idea what 'dividend' means. O'Hara: "Shenanigans!" Vince gives him and RD canned applause. 

The Co-Bros are confused about where there would be nearby mountains where Freeze would be hiding in his air-conditioned lair. RD uses his Germanic heritage to say his one German phrase that he has lost his keys. Vince finds him more intelligent than the earlier villains. (:33) RD thinks he should have gone legit with a cooling and heating company or by using his technology for good and profit. Vince gives him more applause but he knows he would not give up his desire for revenge. 

Mr. Freeze: "I vill toy with him like cat mitt maus!...Virst I toy, und then I destroy!"

His plan is to...use five Batmen and Freezes. He leaves this to his henchmen Nippy, Chill, and...Moe. 

In the Batcave's (not Mr.) Freeze Chamber, the Duo try to adapt to sub-zero temperatures with anti-freeze capsules on monkeys. (:40) RD jumps too far ahead to Vince's liking, ignoring Alfred giving the Duo iced tea for their "chilly reception". Quote he: "contraption". 

RD then has to help Vince understand their logic in reading a map to deal with the now six Batmen running around town. Even Gordon knows something is up, and it's not just the extra person. They find Freeze wants to steal diamonds, or "ice" as he calls them, including one Kashmir Diamond. He melts a horse figure, freezes the safe containing the diamond, then melts it. Yet he doesn't want his henchmen to shoot the guards with actual guns. 

Then the fakes and the real Duo show up for the fight which finally has music and graphics. (:47) Robin almost punches his own friend during the scuffle. "It's the real me, chum!" Mr. Freeze...freezes the Batmobile before escaping with an immediate skywriting "Strike one on Batman!" Vince gives RD applause for correcting his pronunciation of the word "turbines". RD wonders how Mr. Freeze could have pulled off such timing. Vince McMahon: "Creative license."

Back to the Batcave they turn to the Inter-digital Bat-Sorter Anti-Crime Computer to determine that Freeze will now rob jewelry shops. Robin: "YYYEEEAAAHHH!!!" RD hopes they got their money's worth.

They also determine another prospective target with the world's largest diamond would be one Princess Sandra, Formerly Sandra Karlson from Brooklyn. "Baby Got Back!" Vince handwrote and underlined. "Now this was a tasty morsel!" (:51) He gives her 8 Batpoles. RD: "What? She's maybe, dot dot dot, MAYBE, in all caps, if I am being generous, like a 5." Sadly actress Shelby Grant (Formerly Brenda Lou Thompson) is no longer with us. Vince knew her husband Chad Everett. RD keeps unfairly calling her a dog.

Princess Sandra, Formerly Sandra Karlson from Brooklyn gets beef in a crate, but it's actually Freeze as "Cold Cuts!" The two wonder why he had to do such rather than just break in normally, unless he wanted to establish his pun-making capabilities

Cue the Bat-Turn into more serious stuff for some reason as Freeze had frozen and then shattered someone. The two wonder if Alfred will have to clean it up with a wetvac. They also learn his name is Dr. Art Shivel. (Dr. Victor Fries would only be after the 80s Crisis on Infinite Earths.) The Dynamic Duo climb four feet up the building Freeze is in boringly rather than with the Batrope.

Freeze finds his items with a "VUNDERBAR!" (:61) Arby's is Vince's favorite fast food joint but they don't have the Wunderbar ketchup dispenser that was at RD's branch for six months. Vince reminds people to use the Arby sauce which RD's Cincinnati branch didn't have. RD likes asking for "horsey sauce". 

The two disagree on putting mayonnaise on hot dogs. Vince applauds his wife for being married to him for soon to be 38 years despite sometimes getting on each other's heads. This includes using all the condiments which he despises and feels he has to apologize for. (:65) RD never had that problem or any other with his 20 year marriage to Mrs. Deal. 

Anyway, Freeze ignites the curtains to try and distract Batman: "Safety of hotel guests first!" he tells Robin. (:69) Vince wonders why he would want to use fire since he is an iceman. Down on the street Freeze freezes the Duo by pointing his gun at them before pulling the trigger, just as another immediate skywriting states "Strike two on Batman!" 

Mr. Freeze: "That is the way the ice cube crumbles!"

Narrator: "Is Robin cool?...FOR GOOD? Can no one save our noble pair of human Popsicles? Same time, same channel! One word of warning: by watching you too can lose your cool!"

RD thinks this is the worst episode yet and dreads the next one. Vince disagrees due to Freeze's backstory. He also waits 24 hours before kissing his wife after she eats one of her condimented sandwiches. RD responds by calling his wife by the wrong name.

One of Vince's fellows shouted out WrestleCrap. RD was private message shouted out by a former WWE person now at ESPN. (:79)

Vince is not yet familiar with AEW or Tony Khan and doesn't understand the hatred around things. (:89) He plans to watch an episode of Rampage to discuss vs. RD next time for Patreon.


  • Special Guest Villain: Mr. Freeze (George Sanders)

 

  • RD Time Outs: 1
  • Vince Time Outs: 2
  • Entertain The People: 2

Episode 6: Holy Deadlines!: September 5, 2021

Batman is Riled
"Batman avoids a public unmasking but is unable to bring in the Joker, thanks to the villain's utility belt. Eventually, Batman and Robin are captured by the Joker's gang. But the Joker doesn't know a showdown with the Dynamic Duo awaits."
82 minutes 

RD is Harold's Real Dad. He wrote down more than he ever did when he was in university. Vince gives him sound clipped applause for his smarts.

Previously "the Joker throws a curve!", due to his pitching. RD gives a run-down. He enjoyed the narrator randomly saying "gesundheit." 

Vince wonders why the Joker's hair was brown on TV and no where else in the series. (:05) RD reminds him they didn't expect the series to be examined in such minute detail.

Anyway, the Joker does a zombie crawl to try and unmask the Duo. RD thinks he moved slower than near death Andre the Giant. The Co-Bros call him out for again being foiled by the constitutionally-mandated utility belt that he didn't bother to remove from Batman which he used to escape once more through triggering the sprinklers with a bomb. Vince thinks this is foreshadowing the US's future Afghanistan involvement. RD: "Wow." (:10) 

Batman takes too long to secure his Batrope to his Batarang before throwing it (and never missing). I suppose a grapple would be too complicated or big to use and attach to any utility belts (covered by the constitution or otherwise), never mind it looking too much like a gun to confused those like five year old Vince watching.

Batman: "As a duly deputized agent of the law, I order you to surrender!"
Joker: "As the crown prince of crime, I decline! I hope this doesn't depress you!"

And then he uses a theatrical sandbag to pull himself up. As Batman chases Joker stops him with binding confetti. Now fully tied up and helpless...Joker just leaves. RD theorizes he just wanted to have others know who Batman was rather than himself. Vince thinks one of his henchmen would be shooting shaky-cam Raw 50 years later. RD: "No one can be that bad."

Batman (exhausted for some reason): "This time the Joker gave the party. Next time we will hand out the door prizes."

Back at the Batcave they watch anchorman Fred quote the Narrator. Then Fred re-quotes him to Gordon. This depresses him, and causes O'Hara to try and photobomb the screen for some reason. (:18) A very young RD had his photo with Bret Hart photobombed by Owen. Fred thinks the high crime is caused by "Batman and Robin's impotence." Then he quotes the prayers of his Small Son Harold, Just Eight Years Old. (:23) Vince wonders if and why they're overreacting to the Joker's impotence. 

The Co-Bros disagree still on Queenie, even more so when they thought her actress was Kim Novack instead of Nancy. (:27) Mrs. Deal thinks they should rate the men like they do the women with their Batpoles. RD responded by asking her what she thought about Gordon.

Anyway the Joker interrupts to shock Fred with his joy buzzer to taunt Fatman and Boy Blunder. Vince thinks Romero improvised it. RD thinks he enjoys his mocking. Vince liked the camera antics including zooming in the eponymous facial hair and his crooked teeth. RD liked Vince didn't mock Queenie's mask. "As long as you're not impotent."

Vince has to step out of the studio to unsuccessfully retrieve his phone. RD entertains the people by comparing Vince's space unfavorably to his own for a solid minute. (:33)

Alfred corrects Bruce's grammar. Vince is reminded of when Wade Keller also does that when they podcast together. 

While Robin is himself depressed about things, (and Vince thought he was talking about his gimmick when he said "we only have so much to give,") the two figure things out to crash into a glass warehouse to have a fight without word balloons or sound to cover up the stunt doubles. Vince wondered why the Duo would need them instead of doing things themselves and/or with Alfred. RD guesses it was for insurance purposes.

Poor Batman is once again tied up in confetti when he doesn't realize his utility belt was swapped out for a fake one. "He hit us below the belt!" (:43) Cue the newspaper spin headline: "POLICE POWERLESS!" RD thinks that should have been the headline all the time. Robin: "Holy deadlines! We're Grade A dumbbells!" Batman reminds him there's no shame in sometimes putting yourself first.

RD bumps Queenie to 8 Batpoles due to her new look. Vince once interviewed Susie Spirit who is thus off the charts according to his view. Joker aims to do more antics with a fake champagne bottle. "I swear by every fiend of felonious fundom!" RD thought he heard funyuns. I know at least one voice actor who hates them.

Joker (giving the bottle to Queenie): "You know what to do with this." Vince thinks he's sexual innuendo-ing.

Sad News: Last day's bar patron did not show up to heckle the Duo or be a series regular. Instead somebody else did while they were christening the SS Gotham with the Joker's gimmick bottle. RD does Gordon as played by Tiny Tim. Batman, sensing something is up from the cork and the fake utility belt, tells Robin to take a "universal drug antidote" pill with him to combat a "contagious" headache, which may result from knockout gas coming out of the bottle. Vince finds it hilarious that they use gas all the time more than he ever used poles. RD thinks it's that or toy swords.

Joker captures them again and demands the "title" to the boat. The Co-Bros disagree on what that means. (:53) If he does not get it the Joker will decapitate the Duo. Vince knows they're just pretending yet is puzzled by why they're not looking at the action in case something happens. But they get up anyway. Joker: "Egads! What sorcery is this?"

Vince wonders if there are paralyzing gasses other than his own personal one. 

Cue the big fight with music and graphics and the Joker Donkey Kong throwing barrels around before he trips on his own utility belt causing an explosion. Queenie tries and fails to seduce Batman. Quote he: "Poor deluded child."

Fred can now reassure his Small Son Harold, Just Eight Years Old, that Batman & Robin will always be around to help. Sadly neither can do anything to help Dick being picked on again by Bruce and Aunt Harriet while at the piano again. Vince wishes he was able to track down Current Day Harold, Just Sixty Three Years Old. RD pictures him running a Jiffy Lube while drug dealing in Tupelo. Vince thinks his dog Spot gave him rabies. (:61)

To spread things out for the long term (that's the joke), Vince wants a bonus episode for the next time. He thinks next one's Mr. Freeze would also be a strong threat for Batman. RD suggests to wait a while for that until they have more villains to discuss. He finds Joker creepy enough as he is currently, more so than Riddler. 

RD shills. (:70) Vince guesses one Mike Derbin messaged RD that he was using his microphone wrong. He propped it up with a copy of The Death of WCW (10th Anniversary Edition). The two discuss their book writing and potential plans (if got around to them). 

Of the six episodes so far, Vince thinks today's was the best, even if mediocre. RD has it as pretty good, Queenie's presence or otherwise. (:77) Sad News: he never saw The Green Hornet, unlike Vince.


  • Special Guest Villain: The Joker (Cesar Romero)

 

  • Vince Time Outs: 1  
  • Entertain The People:
  • Poor Deluded Child: 1