Episode 45: Testing Ground: August 18, 2019

35 minutes

RD is using the opportunity to test something out, in this case a new audio setup. He lucks into playing the right audio file at least. (:02) Blade was talking to a guy who called it Patron. RD thinks of dessert since he was at an Italian restaurant earlier having some infamous spaghetti of theirs.

Blade is inspired to plug in something to his phone to try things out on the behalf of their 'households' each with 12 listeners in them. Thankfully it works, so he can remain "high-def hungover" in his 'professionalism'. RD: "It sounds exactly the same as the old one." Further sound recording discussion follows. Blade tests the soundbites in response.

Naturally this leads into talking about pop music. (:11)
  • Blade and Don almost saw Tiffany and Debbie Gibson recently as part of an 80s-based concert but didn't want to deal with senior rowdy housewives for the boy bands. RD thinks they would make good potential dates for the single 44 year old. At least he can see the two in some random Sci-Fi monster movie. 
  • RD prefers the later "country girl" Brittney more for her antics than her singing, of which Blade agrees. 
  • They also like Mariah and her own non-country girl diva gimmick. 
  • Blade thought Shoeless Joe Jackson once judged American Idol. 
  • RD has a live remote. 
  • RD still likes Stacey Q who had an appearance in Return of the Living Dead instead of a Wikipedia picture.
  • Blade brings up Goodbye to You by Scandal. RD watches it on Blade's behalf to find Paul Orndorff on guitar and Kerry Von Erich on keyboard standing around in an AWA-pink room. (:30)
 Throughout all this, the two beg for suggestions from the paying audience.

Blade has to go "do something". Let's hope it doesn't involve a trash bag.

284 Pickle-Down Economics: July 24, 2019

All answers point to: YES.
103 minutes

Blade has some unorthodox spelling habits. He also wants to do more than one show a month. RD: "Let me know how that goes."

Blade tries to stake his claim to having the first podcast by wrestling ring veterans. RD disputes this, and his long way round to do things short. Blade is drowsy drunk due to his injured arm from being said wrestling ring veteran.

RD: "You know, when people think: 'who is a veteran of the wrestling scene?' They think the Real Deal RD Reynolds."

RD finds it remarkable the number of people they want to guest invite that they don't follow through on. This included Diamond Dallas Page during their MySpace heyday before his Yoga took off. Drunk Blade: "If you can't self-deprecate yourself what can you do by yourself?" (:16)

One of RD's colleagues at Rupert's Arcade asked him (and by extension myself) what episode of the radio progrem to first listen to. This is a bit of a problem due to how serialized the show is. It may not be traditionally serialized like Game of Thrones or Breaking Bad/Better Call Saul where almost all the episodes constitute the whole of the one series long story, but there is a depth of in-jokes, segments, and characters that may be confusing for an unprepared first timer without any understanding, explanation, or a glossary. And that's just this website. For this reason I would have chosen the closest thing this has to a clip show, even if a long one, to characteristically overview the way things go and what to expect (or not).

Of course, Drunk Blade mishears RD and wants his colleague to listen to other (younger) shows instead. He blames himself for everything before rambling some more. Hey, there's some of that self-deprecation he was just talking about! What a surprise.

RD makes up for missing the Fourth of July by trying out some Red White & Blue Crunch. He approves. (:21)

Blade attempts to be "serious". Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes are already available as special editions in July. Drunk Blade alerts RD in to a Long John Silvers July Fishmas campaign while his painkillers trigger, or so he says. He is too out of it to get Sir Alec to appear, so LJS indirectly promotional considerations instead.

Continuing his state, Drunk Blade misplaced his sources and has to direct RD to Facebook on his behalf. (:35) Gorgeous George also has an injured arm, but this is due to falling out of her truck in an attempt to pee. The Fruitcakes then beg for donations. For themselves, not for her. Drunk Blade makes a bad joke. Even worse, it's the wrong bad joke.

Speaking of Obscure Wrestling News, CM Punk will be at Starrcast III in hometown Chicago, perhaps even joining the WC panel. (:42) The two put over AJ Lee spooning with Daniel Bryan.

This summons Mike Check, who knows a thing or two about spooning. (:45) Blade still has a spare bumper sticker of his.

Mike Check: "You know Brad, that's just fascinating. Can you drive people away from their radio any faster than that?"
Drunk Blade: "If people gave out licenses for the ability to drive people away from radio shows, yours would have been revoked ten years ago."
Mike Check: "It would be revoked because I would not be driving people away from their radio, you are correct."

Anyway, Mike was once at WLAF "The Big Chuckle" in Moline, Illinois, and did the morning drive as Ned Nursenky. When Dr. Demento joined him (somehow finding a quick and easy way to commute between California and Illinois), they became Heading Home with Dr. and the Nurse.

He leaves them with Dave Edmunds singing about a high school reunion. This gets them talking about old games for some reason. Blade thinks they could stream some old video game playing.Well, you could do that at Rupert's Arcade, no? With the added benefit of promotional consideration of the place and all that. Definitely a license to print money if ever there was one (more).

Today's Apter Mag Delight, as it is now called (:56) is from Sports Review Wrestling, January 1990 (released October 1989) and is about "The Fattest Wrestlers Of Our Generation". Wow, Bleacher Report style substance-less lists? Who knew they would be ahead of their time by over 15 years?

The Flamingo Kid Questions: What is the one original but defunct theme you want WWE to return? (:67) Blade wants Shane Douglas' Deep Purple theme. RD wants the Midnight Express.

Speaking of themes, RD wants Ken Patera on to ask him about his swinging full nelson. (:70) Eric Bischoff is going to help head Smackdown. RD wants him to host a show back in the Mall of America. He then has to repeat his story of he and his son meeting Ray Park since Blade is...you know.

Speaking of being inebriated in order to watch something, who would the two have wanted to see but didn't at that pretty bad Raw reunion show the other day? (:82) RD wanted the Goobledy Gooker, Ken Patera, and King Haku with crown as illustrated. Blade would want injured Mickie James in a wheelchair, Black Scorpion, and his usual Demolition. Sad News: Blade had to make his own Demolition Smash figure when he was younger. Sadder News: Ted DiBiase's current championship status is confusing. Saddest News: Torrie Wilson still hasn't won anything. Omega News: Steve Austin alluded to doing illegal things with Gerald Brisco while on tour.

This Is All. The Wrestling. News. You. Need. To Know. This Week. Mr. Braxton:
Kelly Kelly: champ.
Deever and Anonymous
Brooke deserve a reign.

$31.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right

"I believe that professional wrestling podcasting is another sad, bizarre chapter in our human history whose last pages even now are being written."
- Ronald Reagan, 40th President of the United States, Wrestlecrap inductee

283 Stickhead: May 29, 2019

86 minutes
You R.D. can "Stick It", brother!

RD believes that there is a Listener in every timezone, all 24 of them. Perhaps there's half of a Listener in each? Blade crawled out of bed in order to record after recovering from sharing a room with RD at Starrcast II in Las Vegas (where he was feeling even worse).

Sad News: RD did not ask Eric Bischoff, James Storm, or Stu Saks about their favorite cereals while there. He did however go to a CVS with Botchamania Maffew and made fun of him for purchasing some "fake milk". (:13) Their WrestleCrap panel, even if sparsely visited, outdrew Booker T's thanks to the help of many guests there. The two then had dinner at Sammy Hagar's Cabo Wabo. RD once sat at a table (not in Vegas) with Dave Meltzer and Bryan Meltzer who was eating sauce-less ribs. At the StageCoach Casino (in Vegas) Blade drank $3 40 year old Michelob.

Blade: "I'm ashamed of myself."

Speaking of shame, Terri Runnels was arrested in Florida for carrying a concealed loaded handgun. (:28) Blade thinks she has an attractive mugshot, which sounds like something that should be added to any dating site profile for maximum effectiveness. Vince Russo, still blacklisted from Starrcast, has a conspiracy theory that WWE and AEW are secretly in cahoots. RD disagrees. Blade: "I know, right?" (:30)

Tam is still in jail. (:35) Her parole hearing has been postponed for the second time, to August 23rd. She then has six days from that to appear at Starrcast III. Blade: "I miss her doing things."

Bill Apter livens things up by singing with his AptTrolla. (:39) In a supposedly new segment that needs a name, RD will read something from an old Apter Mag (many having been sold at their stand). Today's is from Inside Wrestling, December 1991, Page 30, with an article 'written by' - what a coincidence, Alexandra York. She 'writes' about people needing to join her credit union before they can join her Foundation. Perhaps if she had stayed in it she would have learned from her computer that carrying around a loaded handgun was a bad idea. Blade wonders where all the computers went. RD thinks they went to NORAD. Unsurprisingly, Blade has no idea what NORAD is. Didn't he see WarGames?

William Ridge Casey on Facebook: "Why do wrestlers hate chairs so much?"
Blade: "Because desks are too heavy." (:52)

The Fruitcakes enjoyed Double Or Nothing featuring a (for once) non-Angry Happy Jim. "I don't menstruate," Blade has to clarify for some reason.

On the subject of who they would like to see in AEW, Blade wants Sting, the Black Scorpion, and Demolition (again). RD wants Fred Ottman as "Tug", Hornswoggle, and Mickie James.

Speaking of Hornswoggle, RD got along ridiculously well with Mr. Postl, who visited their stand as an admitted huge fan of WC (and having been in a lot of inducted stuff, including not one but TWO Gooker winners, he should know), strengthened by their shared interest in something called "Muppets dirtsheets". RD promises with great certainty that he will be appearing soon on the radio progrem.

At DON former Dean Ambrose Jon Moxley livened up the whole arena by walking right past RD. (:62) On Chris Jericho's podcast he mentioned how ridiculously senile Vince was during his tenure. Who does he think he is, the President of the United States? (Does that mean he now has to induct himself into his Hall of Fame?) Blade tries out what RD terms "the best voice you've ever done" before he makes an actually sensible good point (yes, I know) that RD and I agree with: all the money in the world, even if it buys you happiness, cannot find for you contentment if the setting does not grant you the space to support it.

RD did not meet Eric in person at the show as he was busy having a good time with others. Blade did however see him at the stand (while RD was away) after being visited by Lizzy Valentine and Mr. Fitness (2). (:77) He actually signed one of his stickheads with some rather...choice words for RD. Later someone visited him at his stand to try to sign another, and Eric actually gave him $10 instead. Clearly that was a bargain at half the price. He did however join them on their shuttle at the end of the day where he called RD, quote: 

"A bowl of douche water!"

Seventeen Syllables right here for us:
The Bischoff stickhead. 
The only thing worse than that?
Bowl of douche water.

"Don't Google it."

$31.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right

Recorded video footage of the attempt to get Eric's signature substituted by $10 is on Patreon, with him laughing about it. Blade wishes he is next insulted by him. (7 minutes)

WCR Video: Every Iron Mark Tyson call on WrestleCrap Radio (so far)!

On Wrestlecrap Radio episode #198, Blade stumbled on an impression of a wrestling "mark" (what is termed on the Internet as someone who thinks wrestling is 100% real) which sounded more like an impression of an impression of, former boxer, Mike Tyson. The character became known as 'Iron "Mark" Tyson', who officially debuted on episode #200, where he called RD and Blade to show that he existed. On episode #201, he called WCR again to ask if Big Show and Mark Henry were okay after the ring collapsed at WWE Vengeance 2011. He then continued to call for 'hot wrestling scoops' on episodes: #202, #204, #205, #208, and #262.

And here they all are for you listening displeasure:

(Video by R.V.M Kai)


And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!


You may have noticed some extra news in the WWCR "Related Tweets" Twitter feed at the left hand side of WrestlecrapRadio.com...probably not?...but it's there...>>>

*UPDATE* 07/22/2019

BREAKING NEWS: The Trolla Corporation and wrestlecrapradio.com have jointly bought 'The Wrestling Bystander', and from this moment forward, will be going under the name "Not Quite The FAXTROLLA". It will be now using a factory refurbished FAXTROLLA for their wrestling scoops. We are also still waiting for HTMM to deliver a new ink cartridge, so we'll have to make do with deciphering NEWS from distorted news-sheets...But it will still do it's best to present "the same facts" as WBS intended.

. . . . .

Anyway, this here website has partnered with a brand new dirtsheet "Wrestling News Force" on Twitter that's full of journalistic integrity, unlike The Observer, The Torch, etc. They are known as The Wrestling By-Stander And just like Blade Braxton's Haiku's, they'll condense all the weeks wrestling news, from scoops from their expert stooges insiders, into 17 syllables...well, actually; 280 characters. It's "REAL" wrestling news, it's NOT "Obscure", and it's presented in the proper "the Smart Mark on social media's" point of view: "Unbiased", "Objective" and "Rational".