Rest In Peace Harry Simon



As RD put it on his site in turn, Blade said it best:


Very sad news to report and I’m still stunned. I just learned of the passing of one of the longtime members of the WrestleCrap family, Harry Simon. For the longtime WrestleCrap Radio listeners, Harry portrayed the role of my longtime rival on the show, the notorious bill collector, John Thomas. Harry’s incredible humor cannot be understated in regards to just how much he meant to our show/listeners in the early days of WCR, as well as the written material he provided for the website. I remember us chatting a while back about how much fun we had doing the old WrestleMania 2 induction, which is where this image is taken from.
Just a great, great guy and a good pal. He will be forever missed. Rest in peace, buddy.

Harry had been one of the WC fellows for a very long time, and his range and scope which were tremendously large spread over to WCR. Although he voiced many random 'guests' on the progrem, his trademark was as the (in)famous John Thomas of Chase Meridian Mastercharge, frequently hounding Mr. Blade Brakestown for his huge credit card bills, going all the way back to 2006. (He was also Lee Marshall on that episode.)


A good and talented man, he will be sorely missed by all, especially on this particularly sad and tragic day. Our thoughts and condolences go out to his family and loved ones.

WrestleCrap Fan Fiction Theatre Episode 15: A Jedi for Christmas

A Jedi for Christmas
As narrated by Sir Alec Heineken

Padmé glanced outside the windows of her home on Naboo. It was Christmas Eve and snow was falling thick and heavy across the ground. She was all alone in the house except for her two small five year old children. Her rambunctious children were chasing each other with boundless energy. They were excited that tomorrow they could open the presents under the tree that had captured their attention over the last few days.

Both Luke and Leia had spent hours trying to guess what was inside the presents and on a number of occasions Padmé had been forced to scold them for their attempts to peel the colorful paper from the boxes. She even threatened Luke that she would return his gifts if he kept up his bad behavior. Padmé was not sure how she survived the last few days with her two children, some days they acted just like their father.

This thought upset Padmé as she watched her small children run around the house. They were all she had this Christmas. She loved her children dearly, but she felt a void with the absence from the person who should be standing by her side right now.

Knowing she was working herself up, Padmé decided to distract herself from her musings. "Luke, Leia, bed!" Padmé called out over their gleeful shouts while she locked the doors to the house. She always feared for her little ones safety, but after all she had been through, one couldn't blame her. She cast a glance out the window once more; drawing her eyes up at the clouds and gave a sad sigh of longing for something she knew she couldn't have.

"But Mommy, it's Christmas!" Luke whined. "Can't we stay up just this once?"

"We're not tired." Leia added, shaking her head so her long brown hair tangled in a tousled mess.

Padmé tore her eyes away from the sky and turned back to her small children. Her sadness must have shown on her face for both her children showed equal looks of concern as they both said, "Mommy, are you all right?"

Padmé's mood lifted at the sight of her young children and her frown dissolved into a soft smile. "I'm fine my little ones, but it is time for you two to go to bed!"

"But Mommy!" Luke and Leia both whined, jutting their bottom lips into identical pouts.

"No!" Padmé stated firmly, then pointing over her twins' heads she said. "No arguments. It is time for bed. Get going, I'll tuck you in."

Both Luke and Leia grumbled, but they knew better than to argue with their mother. However, they made their displeasure known as they sulkily walked towards their rooms.

"Just like your father." Padmé whispered to herself, shaking her head with amusement.


THE END.

257 The Star Wars Holiday Special: December 23, 2015

"Boring conversation anyway!"
80 minutes

RD warns they won't be talking much about wrestling, as is their usual.

"If you're coming here, if you're coming to our Christmas show, and you're expecting in-depth analysis of professional wrestling, I'm afraid my friends you may be disappointed."

That should be their beginning disclaimer on every show, not just this one.

Blade tells about the time he became drunk Darth Vader the one time he saw Twisted Sister. Though that was more about him having trouble breathing (while taking a Force piss) rather than killing some younglings through some bad acting.

RD plays a randomly found old recording of the time they and some of the submitting Listeners randomly sang Jingle Bells. (:05) "We used to be funny," he admits.

The Co-Christmas-Fruitcakes are no longer in contention for the WCFFL (myself having defeated Blade to get into contending for the Fralic Trophy, a first for me! Wish me luck.) so their football expert calls to pout about his tactics. This makes RD laugh. (:08)

RD is nostalgic for the first time I confused him with my submitted ad copy. I admit I am too. Those sure were simpler times! Blade is confused by the multiple URLs that are in play. [Edit by R.V.M Kai: RD may have also given us our new tag-line: "Wrestlecrapradio.com: A fantastic website! It's almost as good as Wrestlecrap.com!"] (:12)

I also sent the Duo a present or so for the season...if you consider the timely ZZ Top's Eliminator a gift like I do. (:15) Blade promises to deliver on his Big Announcement that he first mentioned about in...2007.

The Duo also got a gift from "The Grocery". Not Ray Stevens? (:18) They are Little Debbie's North Pole Nutty Bars. They're smaller than regular Nutty Bars yet still taste the same. Sounds like a rip-off if you ask me.

RD remembers Stevie J's Horray For Khali Claus. (:23)

Fascinating Christmas
there, RJ & Brad.
Speaking of being as old as Khali/Santa Claus, Mike Check calls in. (:25) He actually had his own radio station once: NPOL North Pole 98. The N is for the Northern region you see. Basing things on a bad James Bond movie (Die Another Day, not Spectre) he became Frosty Largerod and lived in an igloo for three months. For a change he plays RD's other beloved Jillian Hall's "Freddy Krueger impression".

:33 The Midnight Rose was in some NES-based wrestling game competition. Blade mixes himself and the Rose up, as is his usual. He blames his controller for his bad performance.

RD was asked by Trash Losagain to manage him one last time in the ring. He remembers the last time he did so over 10 or so years ago, when the Big Show beat him up.

Carl Zayas (2) is concerned about their Star Wars debate from last time. They do however both agree that Episode VII: The Force Awakens was pretty good. RD enjoyed Han Solo redeeming himself from Return Of The Jedi. Blade thinks ROTJ Han was based on RD retroactively somehow.

This brings Sir Alec for some reason. Which makes Blade laugh for some reason. (:41) He has a Star Wars Christmas themed fanfiction piece which sadly does not include that other Sir Alec.

RD remembers Piper at Christmas. (:49)

Jim is down as usual (:51) partly due to him not getting into the ZZ Top action by getting their CD. He also wants to talk about Star Wars for some reason. His spoilers news sources are all wrong, especially about barbecuing, which makes him leave randomly, as is more and more his fashion (Confused Jim perhaps?). And without even verbally flipping them off too! "Go Force yourself!" RD fills in for him.

:57 The Duo get down to some more Star Wars discussion. Only right here *slam* on WrestleCrap Radio!

RD remembered how he was spoiled on The Empire Strikes Back and ROTJ so he tried and succeeded to avoid anything for TFA (a tactic that I also did with equal success). Knowing where things led anyway he was still reflectively sad on what transpired with (TFA) Han. "Not every story has a happy ending," he reminds Blade. Blade is in turn reminded of how RD would fit perfectly in the Star Wars universe with his travails and events and things.

Blade went as Bossk with RD's gift mask and got into conflict with the police there. Wow, who could see that coming? RD & son went with their outfits and had no trouble. Blade thinks he should have gone as dying Darth Vader in ROTJ. "Think of the children!" he says.

RD reminds people who thought TFA was too similar to A New Hope that just because they thought so doesn't mean others who are younger and may not have seen the films before would think the same or not like it, which is a valid point. "Or you might wind up having your favorite character be Jedi Han Solo, that would be a tragedy!" At least he fares better than Blade's Bossk, who just sat around while Luke & Leia broke out Jedi Han/RD from Jabba the Hutt.

Blade then mumbles randomly about how the Ewoks were hidden until release and were thus shown as 'ugly Star Trek style aliens' as black blobs with hair. Someone should follow up on this.

:72 Fellow colleague Jordan Mishkin sent RD a vintage wrestling shirt. Blade received a Pabst Blue Ribbon flask and a Carbonite Han Solo popcorn bucket with a hand puppet of that ESB asteroid monster (Space Slug) from RD. In turn he sent him an Attack Of The Clones shirt, hopefully without sand in it.

Here We Go:
Han Solo is dead.
What did this make me feel like?
Lumpy in my throat.




$28.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
 
 
 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • Christmas
  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 4. GlobalInternet.net, WrestleCrapRadio.com, WrestleCrap.com, Long John Silvers
  • URLs not taken: 2. DarthVaderTakingaLeak.com, LumpyinmyThroat.com
  • SPEAKING OFs: 3. Sponsors, sentient beings, getting back in the wrestling ring
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
 
  • Phone Calls & Run Ins: 5. WrestleCrap Fantasy Football Drag Queen, The Great Khali, Mike Check, Sir Alec Heineken, Jim
 
  • Blade Time Outs: 3 (1 Real Quick)
  • Blade Burps: 1
  • Robot Reindeer Laughs:  2

  • Mike Check Radio Row: 
    • Station/Market:  NPOL North Pole 98 FM (North Pole)
    • Radio Call Sign:  Frosty Large Rod
    • Show:  N/A
    • Song:  Santa Baby by Jillian Hall
 
  • Question of the Week from: Carl Zayas (2)
    • After hearing the back and forth between you and Blade, I was wondering, are you both okay?  I got worried. I haven’t heard a heated exchange between two people since me and my buddy almost engaged in fisticuffs in an argument about Wookies versus Gungans. I guess my question, is this normal? Yes.
 
  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Blade hates the new Star Wars:
    Han Solo is dead.
    What did this make me feel like?
    Lumpy in my throat.

WCR Video: Minisode Flashback #047: A HorseTrolla Xmas

Since Mike Check is playing "Santa Claus Is A Black Man" by Akim and Teddy Vann; this Minisode contains the story (from Wrestlecrap Radio's 2006 Christmas episode #047) about how a young RD Reynolds discovered the shocking "truth" about Santa Claus. While visiting Santa at the mall as a child, like lot of us, he was expecting to meet a bearded, old, overweight Caucasian male. But seeing an African American man in a Santa suit sort of changed his perspective on things.

Also included in this Minisode:
  • Custom Cornhole Games all over Indiana
  • Lupita
  • Little Debbie Xmas Trees were gone.
  • RD receives the HorseTrolla
  • Francine un-retired.
  • Dr. Keith sent a magazine.
  • Blade and RD exchange gifts.


(by WCR Minisodes)

...And Merry Christmas from all of us at WrestlecrapRadio.com!

And be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives and here for more WCR Minisodes!

WCR Video: Interactive: (Furthest Thing To) Perfect

On Episode #256 of Wrestlecrap Radio, RD and Blade brought back one of my (R.V.M Kai) favourite segments; the Interactives. For those not familiar, it was basically a segment where the Co-Fruitcakes play a clip from YouTube and provide their hilarious brand of commentary to it. Well after mentioning the name of an independent pro-wrestler "Tommy Lee Curtis", from cwecanda.ca, who's ring-name is the "closest thing to" Jamie Lee Curtis, they wondered if he was related to the actress and can legally call himself "Mr. Perfect"? This then reminds them of some forgotten movie from the 1980's called "Perfect" (starring JLC and John Trovolta) and the song (Closest Thing To) Perfect by Jermaine (we couldn't afford Michael) Jackson, from it's soundtrack.

Anywho, I created and uploaded the video to complement their commentary track of the aforementioned music video...which is the "Furthest Thing To Perfect", let me tell you:


(Video by R.V.M Kai)

Unfortunately, you will not be able to find this song yet on The Mike Check Show due to his annual "Christmas Carousal" now playing during the month of December. But stay tuned.

And be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!