Minisode #127 Preparing the Turkeys

by iggy



November 21, 2008

Don Mason's Reddi-Whip
Little Debbie jacked up the price of her Snack Trees
Angry Jim talks about Doc tenderizes the meat
Chief Jay calls

#white afro #praying

127 Thanks For Nothing: November 21, 2008

"Thanks For Nothing!"
82 minutes
Written by Premier Blah

Thanksgiving has landed like the Mayflower on American soil, and Blade looks forward once more to the Lions losing yet again. He also doesn't like pecan pie for some reason, and he missed buying some Bo Jackson pumpkin pie. There's always a next time... French vanilla cool whip is given some psychoanalytical treatment. Don...Don Mason was once caught with Ready Whip to remove the 'salty taste'. (:03) This week's Classic Inductions are glossed over, which feature the Gobbeldy Gooker, the AWA Team Challenge Series featuring a Turkey on a Pole, and a ruined Survivor Series (:04). Oh, and the new induction is Tatanka (Buffalo) returning to WWE and hating Thanksgiving due to the injustices done to his people, which is on the same level of authenticity as Commander Chakotay's Native American heritage on Star Trek: Voyager. RD and Blade wonder if Samoa Joe basted and cooked as a turkey would be better than the real thing. A temporary sponsor: the 2008 Archive DVD, taking the place earlier occupied of the WrestleCrap Book of LISTS Exclamation Point! Shilling of it ensues.

Blade's TRIP down the Cereal Aisle (:11) has him encountering Coco Drops, which to him resembles shit. RD is enraged because Little Debbie Snack Trees have increased in price - who can blame them in this sterling economy? Blade fails to entertain us. (:15) Little Debbie is 48 years of age according to RD's searches. Blade wonders if she can pose for Playboy and finds this flattering picture on Google. 'Powerful people' are mentioned as part of the 12 Listeners (:18)Well, yes, they are. They have electrical power alright.

(I apologize for that.)

Paul London today
(artist's representation)
Obscure Wrestling News - a $20 million cut is rumored for WWE (:22) Could Supercrazy be a solution? An unemployed Paul London can be booked (perhaps for your next birthday party) at plfutureendeavors@yahoo.com. There's discussion of hiring him as a co-host (or TNA correspondent), but can he be understood through his mask?

Anonymous Brooke (remember her?) has won some sort of 'Freestyle Fitness Mexico 2008 Contest' to the tune of $5000 (:29). Wow...I've seen randomly moronic game show contestants win more money than her in just a few minutes. This must have included competing in evening gown and swimsuit contests, resulting in heated discussion of her as a parade. Robecca DiPietro has made another commercial but her double entendre actions puzzle our co-hosts. Perhaps that porn music can help us out.

Meanwhile current Diva Tiffany promotes veganism on her blog. (:41) RD and Blade slightly mock her about her knowledge of animal treatment. Jim Ross calls (:42), and of course being a cattle man with his myriad BBQ sauces is completely opposed - after all who doesn't like meat? (Especially if it's Jim's own.) He has a Myspace page! He spends his time telling us how to make a turkey, and we hear how "Doc beats Jim's meat." Well there you go. Blade can't stop laughing while as him.

Oh, and Marc Mero was robbed this week. (:51) Perhaps the same guy who robbed a psychotic Balls Mahoney a while back did the deed?

The phone rings again and it's...Chief Jay Strongbow? RD picks up and puts the phone down.

Blade: Not only was that nonsensical, but that could be the most random moment in WrestleCrap Radio history.

Question Of The Week from Darth Who (2) (:54) concerns Christmas decorations. Blade is already drunk from his hospital mug. Good for him.

SPEAKING OF drinking, Nathaniel (:59) 'talks' about wrestling video games and TNA Impact. Time: 6 minutes. At least from this we know that he knows more than just TNA Total Non-Stop Action Wrestling! Blade wishes only the worst for him should they finally fire him. Preferably out of a cannon.

Music-Less Current Wrestling News is worn out from Nate (like me). RD promises to find music after nearly four years of silence. It emulates the current state of wrestling, and thus something they are not very much enthused about. Well, except for Randy Savage's cool-ass beard. I think I've found my new forum signature! (:69) He's also voice acting in the upcoming Disney film Bolt (Exclamation Point). Sadly it's just a generic animated movie (which is generally any animated movie these days not made by Pixar) and not the Vincent Lecavalier Story, unfortunately.

There's TMZ footage somewhere of Roddy Piper smoking marijuana and acting hopped up (of which my colleague Iggy has managed to find.). Hulk Hogan is selling his trademarks to Eric Bischoff so Linda can't get it...errr...

Chief Jay Strongbow's appearance on live TV angers RD and Blade who wish for a little randomness in it all (and random people appearing too).

Blade's gonna finish y'all off here with seventeen syllables about Chief Jay Strongbow:
He's Chief Jay Strongbow.
It's not why he was on Raw
It's just one word: How.

RD quotes Tatanka: "Thanks for nothing!"

The next show is in two weeks, friends.

Minisode #126 Angry Jim Went to England

by iggy



November 14, 2008

Angry Jim does not like mushy peas
Lena Yoda
Don Mason does not like bubblin'

#tea and crumpets #fired you are

126 Top (Wrestle)Chef: November 14, 2008

Top (Wrestle)Chef
61 minutes
Written by Premier Blah

Although the release date of the WrestleCrap Archive Volume II Electric Boogaloo DVD has been delayed slightly, the Teaser Trailer for the WCR Shoot Interview has been uploaded to show that it actually was recorded just recently and actually exists. Blade is once again in trouble for his lewdness and his frequent conversation about cereals that time, but that fails in comparison compared to the brought up 'continuity error' (AKA random laziness) of resurrecting Stubby just for the sake of the Shoot. And it was lasting so well too! Ah well. Another Triple Kelly induction makes its way this week, this time of Booker T's Einsteinesque intelligence on The Weakest Link (thank God he was more smarter for Family Feud). The Angry Marks ad feed is again updated, with the aid of a lot of exclamation points.

Discussion of the Shoot Interview continues in RD's TRIP to the Grocery (:09). If Blade had to go shopping Black Friday he would bring Don...Don Mason along with him. To try and get RD off his tail on that line of thinking Blade tells us about what Don told him "why you shouldn't have anal sex." (:12)

Mr. Braxton visited the famous World Food Aisle and confuses RD and us somehow. (:15) Blade is sure one of the 12 Listeners (and thus by default one of the 12 Readers of this article) is listening to this while having sex, but RD is unsure. I'm guessing Blade does, preferably while wearing his Katie Vick outfit.

RD's friend Clayton is on the line; you'll remember him as the man of the King Pedophile commercials and of the taco Doritos debate. (:17 - :26) Blade wonders if he lives in the not too distant future way down in Deep 13 hatching an evil scheme with TV's Frank concerning sending a man into space and subjecting him to really bad movies (hey, he mentioned it first, not me). Regardless, Clayton says that "the incoherent rantings of a drunken hobo" are half-right; not all places in the Continental US sell them, so Blade might not find any near his location like Clayton does. [I thought Blade knew there are Taco Doritos, but they didn't taste like the Taco Doritos he grew up with...There is a pattern of Blade loving things which are extinct. --Iggy] As you can expect on a fine wrestling progrem such as this some discussion of Doritos ensures. Mention is made of the Fruity Pebbles/Mountain Dew Doritos (AKA the Epic Fail Doritos as RD calls them).

Faxtrolla's Obscure Wrestling NEWS - would you pay for a WrestleCrap video podcast? (:27) I know I would, particularly to see if Blade's wearing no pants and is drunk/hungover every week. This week, we visit The Hulk Hogan Experiment, a rapper trying (and almost getting too at times) to sound as gruff as the Hulkster. In that case shouldn't he call himself Brother Hulkster then? RD thinks the few tracks the man has sound better than that Hulk Rules album. I still prefer the Family Man song though. (There's some attempt to make a video out of all this here.)

Blade gets a MySpace bulletin from the Maestro (Stro?), advising him to do Christmas shopping with some memorabilia at some site or other. If you want to buy overpriced t-shirts with a simple picture on them, now's your chance! Of particular interest to our co-hosts is the mousepad which makes him look like he's dead. Why, I didn't even know he was sick! (Though to me he looks more like the Ghost Rider.)

Jim Ross calls (:40), still bitter on being on Smackdown and being sent overseas like RD was and being fed mushy peas and tea and crumpets and baby food, BUH GAWD! One of Blade's favorite foods is some sort of 'baby wienies', whatever the hell they are. [Vienna Sausages —iggy] But I still think you can serve them with JR's barbeque sauce. RD promises not to tell JR's wife about his pulled pork with Mickie James.

Question Statement of the Week (:46) from Frequent Questioner (and this week, an unhappy one) Ultimate Kennedy (6), shares my views of 'Nathaniel'.

SPEAKING OF Nathaniel, here he comes again. RD changed his number as a preemptive measure so he has to call him; oh the humanity. (:49) This week he's more animated than usual. Blade would rather watch the Lions lose - I of course, prefer the Habitant, who are often so erratic they make the Joker look quite sane. TNA's Turning Point is discussed amid all the noise pollution. However, this time it's somewhat slightly less annoying, mostly due to Blade having more time to actually get some words in sideways against him, and the two shouting him down. Total time: 3:30 minutes. Blade tries his own impression of RD doing his impression of Nathaniel. They fear the 12 Listeners tune out and miss the Current Wrestling News and Haiku  - which isn't that big of a deal for them to fret about. They can waste less time and just read them on this very site.

SPEAKING OF Music-less Current Wrestling Sad News: Mike Adamle is no longer on TV (:54), even though he only served one year out of a three year contract. [I think it was only a one year deal and that RD somehow mistook Mike Adamle for Ric Flair. —iggy] WWE cleaned out a portion of their roster, among them Lena Yada. Blade laments she was not named Lena Yoda.

Seventeen Syllables from a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...
Oooh! Lena Yoda!
Business not strong in this one.
Mmmm! Fired you are!

RD: Yoda kinda sounds like he has some Angry Jim Ross in him.
Blade: So what you're telling me is Jim Ross fucked Yoda?
RD: (Yoda) Mmmm! To the Dark Side he went!

Well, if there's ever some sort of Wookie-style BBQ sauce involved in some way, then...

WCR Video: WrestleCrap Radio Shoot Interview Trailer

"Here's a sneak peak at the brand new WrestleCrap Radio Shoot Interview DVD! Go behind the scenes at WrestleCrap and WrestleCrap Radio with your pals RD Reynolds and Blade Braxton. Get your copy FREE with the purchase of the 2008 WrestleCrap Archive DVD-ROM, exclusively at www.wrestlecrap.com!" - RD Reynolds


(Video by WrestleCrapRD)

Minisode #125 Old Ladies at the Grocery

by iggy



November 7, 2008

RD tasted euro milk.
Blade used to work at the grocery.
Don Mason can tell time.

#frosties #warm vinegar

125 RD's European Tour: November 7, 2008

RD's European Tour
73 minutes
Written by Premier Blah

A new induction by Triple Kelly graces us this week, of Jesse Ventura interviewing 'Prince', as played by C. Thomas Howell.

RD & Blade are happy about the recent presidential election and how it turned out. Blade philosophically wonders about change and how it leads to money. (Well if you want change I suggest to put out your cup.) He makes a promise that by the end of the show we will wonder why we wasted 60 minutes of our lives listening to it. It's like he's reading my mind! RD once again compares Obama to the Rock, (:03) which means his contender for 2012 has to be Blade, or something. There's some confusion about the band Europe and the continent Europe - but hey, at least they're smarter than Sarah Palin in that regard, who anonymously thought Africa was a country. [That was a lie from a blogger. I'm sure she has heard plenty of jokes involving Niger. —iggy]

RD's TRIP to Europe is revealed to us, (:04) as Blade wonders of the continent's brothels, not surprisingly. In all, Mr. Reynolds visited France, Germany, Austria, Italy and the Netherlands. He did not however meet anybody who smelled like Salisbury steak. (:06) RD further regales us of his taxi ride from Hell (:07 - :23), including him scaring people with his criminal like behavior and his bad German. Perhaps it's secretly his Halloween costume? During this we randomly YouTube the theme to Spider-man and his Amazing Friends (:10)

Blade: That is one of the glorious things -
RD: Of this show? That it doesn't make any sense whatsoever?

http://bignippledvampire.com/ has been updated. Blade proposes that the site can help show us the proper way to have sex. Mama Deal is promised to be on the show later.

No TRIP to the Grocery/World Food Aisle this week, what with RD being in Europe and all. He did eat some Frosties with vinegar urine milk at his hotel though. (:28) I wonder if the freshness date was in German too. An old hag once fainted in front of Don...Don Mason while at the check-out line.

RD talks with his mother. (:32 - :42) When I initially heard this I thought it was Triple Kelly pretending to be his mother in some strange sort of a twisted joke. I was glad to see I was wrong on that count. She advises us not to hand out little boxes of pretzels for Halloween. Blade wants Mama Deal's popcorn balls, perhaps with razor blades. It's a lovely sense of enjoyment to listen. (And if you don't agree, what on earth is the matter with you???)

Obscure Sad News (:42) Val Venis/Sean Morley is giving his dog Jupiter away - I hope he has better success than he did with his laptop. Blade's dog once got drunk. The expected Uranus joke is made.

SPEAKING OF anus...Beetlejuice shit his pants in some sort of public outing (:50) Wow, we're really stretching it here. WrestleCrap friend Brother Midnight will make an announcement in the upcoming week - maybe he's going to appear in TNA? (:52) Speaking of TNA, 'Nathaniel' kept trying to call RD while in Europe, perhaps to try and reach his mother. That makes no sense - wouldn't his mother have noticed the large phone bills sent to her and got suspicious by the first day? Needless to say I don't buy it.

Question of the Week from Darth Who (:53) has RD and Blade discussing a WrestleCrap Celebrity Wrestling show, in the vein of Hogan's Celebrity Wrestling mentioned last week. What happened to their Carnival?

Hereeeeee's Nate, and the crowd goes mild. (:57) RD needs Excedrin when he hears his theme. What a coincidence, so do I.  Total on air time: four minutes. Look, if its any trouble, I would personally volunteer for TNA correspondent. Judging by what we get on the radio progrem it would basically involve watching no TNA at all and just wasting time on the air shooting the breeze. There, problem solved.

The HorseTrolla neighs: Mickie James was Tomb Raider Lara Croft on Cyber Sunday, but Blade disapproves of her black shorts due to not seeing her centaur ass; he prefers white. He must seriously be joking. (:64) He also calls her 'Laura'. I didn't realize Lara had a twin.

The 806th episode of Raw (:65) confuses RD and Blade who thought it was the 800th, but was actually the celebration of that (800th) milestone. (Hmmm, remind you of anyone?) Mae Young's Raw appearance could be an early Gooker contender. DX's actions with Lillian Garcia and her equine face further confuse our co-hosts.

Blade's gonna give you Seventeen Syllables:
Horsefaced Lillian.
CaballoTrolla! That's
Spanish for Horseface.

The newly deceased SD Jones is already rolling in his grave from all this. Why, I didn't even know he was sick!