255 Tee Hee Halloween: October 30, 2015

"And ya gonna say please & thank ya!"
106 minutes

RD surrounds himself with candles. Huey has yet to update his jokes.

Roddy Piper returns from the grave to warn us about staying safe at Halloween, bless him forever more. (:04)

The Royals are in the World Series (including two Reds as RD points out). To be sure I would have preferred the Blue Jays instead but I like both teams and the Royals put a stronger showing for the Championship Series anyway. Blade hates waking up early to watch the Lions and Chiefs playing in England because the NFL desperately wants Europeans (non-Americans) to watch American (non-European) football. On an unrelated note, RD's Drag Queen with a voice like Ben Vereen advises you to draft Arian Foster. I agree. (:09)

The Pit where PB keeps Raging_Demons ???
For a change, Raging Demons does this week's shilling.  (:13) To be fair he has a much better voice than I even if he is trapped in a pit like RD says he is. Perhaps he's confusing him with Dante's portrayal of Satan in the Ninth Circle of Hell...or perhaps he's confusing him with the WWCR character of Satan. (He'll be appearing later on in the progrem in case you were one of the two people who missed him.)

The Intestinal Fortitude didn't pay for this episode sadly, so RD shills his site and Archives more. Listen to the man, I implore you! Trust me, you won't regret your purchase. (You can regret listening to this radio progrem instead.)

According to RD Blade last wrote a Jobber Of The Week in 2003. He Big Announcements some more in response. (:17) They then argue on the availability of Orange Slice.

Blade did some sort of part and found some more folks to go along with him to the grocery. Sadly Eva Savelalot was not one of them. (:22)

The strangest thing the two didn't pick up on was that Mr. T also did a 1-800 Collect commercial or two - foo!, and the Pinkman, Aaron Paul, was in one of them. (He did quite a few commercials and famously appeared on a Barker era The Price Is Right before his breakout discovery by a cancer suffering high school chemistry teacher eager to break into the drug/meth business. Sadly in none of them did he call anyone bitches. He should go back and correct that now with the power of his Emmys before Vince calls him to guest host Raw.)

Anyway, Blade has some Zapps' Voodoo Potato Chips that he hands off to Don to try without even bothering to cue up his theme jingle. Sad News: when trick-or-treating with his children he does not wear his mask; although it does help fans (he has fans living nearby right?) come up to him on the street to ask him for the proper application of corn oil. Even Sadder: the chips are not malt vinegar/BBQ/rib-flavored like he thinks they are.

Danielle Harris with NOT Blade Braxton
Blade's compatriot Midnight Rose met Scream Queen Danielle Harris in a very loud place. She prefers granola much to his surprise. (:36) At that same loud place he also talked with Traci Lords who likes Lucky Charms, which currently have Hot Mask Action.

"And that's the bottom of the line,
'cause Stone Cold Austin said so!"
"Stone Cold Austin" finally has his own beer, Broken Skull IPA, which Blade is apparently already acquainted with based on how drunk he sounds. (:44) The flavor's description confuses Blade with its toxic-sounding ingredients and RD by how it describes itself as "polite".

Kurt Angle wants to teach while taking a year off after escaping TNA. That sounds like the setting for a sitcom. (:52)

Speaking of obscure, Curt Hawkins, currently in Global Force Wrestling, announces the 'debut' of one BM Punk to the company. (:55) The real BM is not happy with the news, and in constipation flushes his frustration out on RD in a bad case of verbal diarrhea.

"Old" Rosa Mendes is pregnant. (:58) So too is "feverish" ClockTrolla champion Candice Michelle. Her current child looks rather vampiric.

Tammy/Tam needs money so she's going to sell pictures of her Mexican vacation from sunnyskype8@gmail.com. The duo overthink on what she has to offer. (:65)

As if on cue Satan pays a visit. (:70) Actually it's Stan, the Evil Troll Lord now, perhaps taking a cue from Tammy trying to change her name for some reason from the last time. Also, his Tubular Bells once again sound different. Like Jim earlier he also hasn't been paid his royalties and he desperately needs his money to pay landlord God (landgod? landdiety?) for his lease in Hell. He recounts how Tammy is again feuding with people on Twitter, though it's about her looks from her youth so I have to take her side on this one.

Also on cue on cue Mike Check calls in, also wanting his royalties. (:76) Blade's usual silliness causes RD to chuckle and break character.

When he regains his composure Mike tells them about the time he was in the Salem, Massachusetts market in WTCH "The Witch". He was Johnny Boo and together with a female DJ named Ann B Love, they did Afternoon Delight with Boo B Love. (get it?!?!?!) His ensuing music drowns the sleeping RD.

Mike: "Why does RJ never talk when I'm on here?"

Blade thinks the monetary reward from Questioning (of the week) should be tax-refundable. Of course, that's for INTERNATIONAL i.e. usually NON-AMERICAN folks who don't believe in taxes (or death for that matter) so I have no idea how that would work.

Zane U Paisley (2) wants to know what wrestling shirt he should wear for jury duty. (:90) RD often wears Blade's Dungeon Of Doom shirt, especially while exercising. When Blade is not exercising once a week he wears his ECW Francine shirt that rips off Stone Cold Austin. Then he starts chuckling too.

What's this? News about Hulk Hogan that's NOT related to his racism? (:75) Someone's dug up an old WCW contract of his, and it's pretty amazing the amount of millions he received even while WCW was losing money...followed by Hogan losing his money to Linda. Blade remembers his (still on going?) creepy love for Brooke and her long legs. RD plays ZZ Top's Sleeping Bag as his answer.

Hell In A Cell was alright. Of course neither Co-Fruitcake talks about it much.

One Fun Sized Package:
Vince doesn't like blood.
Will the next pay per view be
sponsored by Tampax?

$28.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)


  • Halloween
  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. WrestleCrapRadio.com, WrestleCrap.com, Drive In Movie Maniacs
  • URLs not taken: 3. Evasavealot.com, PleaseandThankYa.com, hornyonquaaludes.com
  • SPEAKING OFs: 4. Holiday jokes and wisdom, perfect guests, shocking, shocker
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 2. Ben Vereen, Eva Savealot
  • Phone Calls & Run Ins: 9. WrestleCrap Fantasy Football Drag Queen, Raging_Demons, Eva Savealot, Don Mason, Danielle Harris, Traci Lords, BM Punk, Stan (formerly known as Satan). Mike Check
  • RD Time Outs: 2 (1 Real Quick)
  • Blade Burps: 1
  • Huey The Ghoul Laughs: 9
  • WrestleCrap Gongs:  1
  • Mike Check Radio Row: 
  • Question of the Week from: Zane U Paisley (2)
    • I’ve been summoned for Jury duty. What pro wrestling shirt should I wear to court?  Anxiously awaiting your response. Blade: Francine 4:69 t-shirt.
  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Vince isn't a fan of color. SummersEveSlam?
    Vince doesn't like blood.
    Will the next pay per view be
    sponsored by Tampax?

WCR Video (Repeat): Roddy Piper Double Feature: Halloween Tips & "They Live" Parody

The following WCR Videos were featured on wrestlecrapradio.com around Halloween 2013 as an annual tribute to "Rowdy" Roddy Piper's Halloween Tips. I (R.V.M Kai) sadly discontinued this last year when I featured a Don Mason (yes I'm talking about: Don...Don Mason) Halloween clip last year instead. Well the good news is that...

Video #1 features the return of the Classic Rowdy Roddy Piper Halloween Tips (from episode #081: October 26, 2007) on this here site for 2015.

(Video by J Freek)

Also enjoy Video #2: "They Live? I didn't even know they were sick?": A WCR parody of Hot Rod's movie "They Live" (created by LannysPermJuice)

And speaking of "They Live", The Mike Check Show is currently playing a song from the movie soundtrack.

So now say "Please and Thank Ya"!...or rather from now on:

"Then what you're gonna do is you're gonna have lots of fun and gonna say to each other Happy Halloween and Trick or Treat" - "Rowdy" Roddy Piper (1954 - 2015)

...And be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives

Want to make your WWCR experience even MORE random?

Well now you can! Thanks to the newly added "View Random Page" button...wherever it is in the page. It's a very...random placement, you could say.

Just click the large blue button located in the sidebar and be prepared to be taken to ANY random posting or page on the site, no matter how small or nonsensical or nonsensically small it may be! Who knows...you may even enjoy it!

[Disclaimer: WrestleCrapRadio takes no responsibility in the event of any side effects that emerge as a result of random post usage, which may include confusion, baldness, numbness, headache, and halitosis. Randomness is not for everyone. Consult your IP address before use.]

WCR Video: Minisode Flashback #009: At The Feed Market

Relive RD and Blade's joy for "The Boogeyman's" WWE debut with this Minisode, from Wrestlecrap Radio's 9th episode back in 2005, and hear about how he broke a clock over his head and 'stole their hearts'. (Also on this Minisode; A trip to the Grocery/Video Store story, news of Ricky Morton being in jail and Tajri's wife being lonely at home because she couldn't get a drivers' license).

...And speaking of "The Boogeyman making a debut", after we all saw (except for Mike Check's daughter for some possible Ultimate Warrior in a mirror type of reason?) 6 weeks of Boogeyman vignettes on The Mike Check Show; The Boogeyman has finally "come to get" Mike Check today during 2015's edition of "Halloween Hootenanny"!

P.S. But since, sadly, all good things come to an end, hear RD Reynolds singing "Goodbye to the Boogeyman" after his 2009 WWE release here.

And be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives and here for more WCR Minisodes!

254 Derailed: October 10, 2015

All Aboard The Trainwreck: Please & No Thank ya!
91 minutes

Blade enjoys his Boo Berry. According to him his Roll Up variant makes Boo look like sperm.

That's what she said.

This is the only solace for Blade, as he doesn't feel well, or so he says. That hasn't stopped him co-hosssing of course. The most harm he can do in his condition is to cough into the microphone. The upshot if there is one is that the medicine gives him an excuse to act pseudo-intoxicated, if any.

RD returns to the subject of (12) Listeners who have no idea about the main site that gave birth to the radio progrem. So the Duo discuss his latest induction. It's not like he already mentions the site every recording or something. (:05) The talk of masks leads into the Pingkin calling in, (:12) and this time RD remembers to use Satan's voice modifier to make him more Michael Clarke Duncan (RIP) this time around. I think he just wanted to call to prove he actually/still exists on the show.

Although my shilling is now timed at 10 seconds long, sadly Blade is too ill and confused to hear it well, poor guy. (:14) This infection spreads to them messing around in The Intestinal Fortitude's new ad copy. RD then shills the Archives some more. Seriously, go buy an entry for it. It's only $15 measly dollars! (Which is better than the measles the Co-Hosses seem to be suffering from at present.)

:19 RD took a TRIP...from lunch during work where he met a(nother) hobo wanting to give him head, and I don't mean Al Snow's companion. Quote Mrs. Deal doing a reverse Roddy Piper: "Well I hope you said "no thank you"!" Surprisingly this story doesn't help Blade's condition.

Blade had one of those Halloween Whoopers that constipated him and made his poop green. (:27)

RD: "Why did I ever agree to start this show again? I don't know."

Blade found some 20 year old candy bars that he is going to auction to an unwilling audience. (:33) RD has yet to see Who Framed Roger Rabbit? 

:37 Dave Batista has married for the third time to a "pole dancer" which makes Blade think of horses for some reason. (From what I can tell of her she doesn't seem to have a long face.) He's definitely still pining (like a horse?) for Mickie James. "Obviously I'm a man," he attempts to remind.

Artist's representation
of a poison mushroom
Sad News: Blade's never been married even as he hits 40. Actual Sad News: The Rock's puppy, the one he saved from drowning, didn't cheat death a second time, succumbing to a poison mushroom. (:41)

Rockin' Robin is 51 years young. This summons Blade's (Viewing Booth) Bill Cosby impression for some reason as an excuse to play her singing again. I hope she invited Brother Hood to her birthday party if she held one. Cue "Bill" mumbling worse than my shill up above. (Don't ask me for any (Viewing Booth) Bill Cosby impressions as I'm terrible at those.) (:45)

Eve Torres had a child named Raeven, pronounced with an H. Please, nevermore with these awkward child names. (:50) RD gongs themselves. The HorseTrolla is still well oiled and functional and tells us that Mickie James is once again attempting to break into the country music scene. (:54)

RD: "You have to be very sick if this show is making you laugh."

:56 "Good" News: Tammy got bailed out of prison. She doesn't like her full name for some reason. May I suggest Raeven? Pronounced with an H. (Or Hammy if you prefer. Or Ham if she still wants the shorter name.) She supposedly found yet another boyfriend through her camera work - not explicit of course! - and you know it's true love when he doesn't have to pay for it. Just TALKING about her makes Blade laugh out (sickly) loud, which just about says it all. She's doing haunted houses now. Not visiting them for the sake of her (web-cam) audience mind you; actually being a performer in one of them.

RD: "Wooow! What a deal! So not only do you get to see a WWF Hall Of Famer get killed [in the Haunted House], you get a free 8x10!"

Worried about how the "trainwreck" of a progrem is going, RD jumps tracks to another trainwreck of TNA, now in its death throes. Yes, again.  (:63) Hopefully this time it stays down; even the Black Knight is looking at and shaking his head ruefully (as King Arthur decapitates him, only for him to continue talking.) As Blade puts it (in line with me commenting on this somewhere), it will not be long until they go the way of the AWA and have turkey on a pole matches in an empty pink arena. I would just cut out the middle man. Their 'arenas' are already empty and instead of having more disjointed matches the 'lucky' viewer could watch the wrestlers paint the arena in pink - something far more entertaining than whatever on earth TNA is doing or not doing. To quote an excellent page on the Death of TNA, in regards to the recent Bound For Glory:

  • "On September 28, six days before their biggest show of the year, TNA announced the semi-main event for Bound For Glory, Kurt Angle vs. Eric Young, over Twitter." 
  • "People who purchased a VIP ticket to the show were given perks such as a tour of the arena and backstage area from Dixie Carter, and a meal from the catering table. TNA talent were reportedly upset at the "lack of privacy" they had."

Also of rather important note:

  • "The following day TNA made another one of their famous "big announcements". This time the big announcement was that Mahabali Shera, EC3 and Rebel would go to India to make an announcement there. That's right, TNA's big announcement was that there would be a big announcement."

I think Blade may be covertly working for TNA ala Vince Russo.

Blade may be sick but he was a trooper enough to persuade the Honky Tonk Mailman to call in, you're a beautiful audience thank you very much. However Blade's sickness infects even his line, as he's more hard to hear than usual, even worse than me up there. He catches them up on Mark Hardy/Mardy returning to action after the birth of his gargoyle kid. He has a Dixie Carter commemorative stamp only available until January.

:72 The WFFDQ advises to pick up Tony Romo. Forget the fact that he's currently injured at episode's run time; he's currently performing better than he did when he was healthy. He's a steal!

Oh and in case you were wondering, as of this writing RD and Blade's FF teams are currently in the middle while I'm near the top - but things can always change, as they usually do.

:74 Allan in Milwaukee wants to know why Stephanie will win this year's Ultimate Warrior Award. RD had a bumper crop of sent in questions after last time's begging, so of course out of all of them he chooses this one. Blade wants two fingered referee "The Iron Duke" Jim Mitchell to win it instead.

Blade: "This show is something else."
RD: "That's the most factually accurate statement you ever made."

Blade delays his Big Announcement. (See above re: TNA.)

:77 WWE may release a Scott Hall DVD. I look forward to how they handle his time in WCW.

James Storm, who had been with TNA FROM DAY ONE, has finally escaped his wrestling banishment to debut on NXT. [He would return in January, but fellow veterans AJ Styles, Bobby Roode, and Eric Young took his place instead.] The Co-Fruitcakes calculate how much TNA would be worth based on their donations - around $14 or so, which is still far overpriced. Blade attempts some serious conversation on Kurt Angle and his Moveset. Then he does his impression of Miss Elizabeth mumbling. My guess is Savage locked her in a room again and she's talking through the door.

Seventeen Syllables Of Current Wrestling News we're gonna get right here in seconds/Seventeen Syllables on the most recent Madison Garden Show once the song hits:
The MSG Show.
Yawn. Hehehehehehe

The MSG Show.
Yawn. It was more like War to
Not Settle the Bore.

RD apologizes profusely for the radio progrem reverting back to its old ways, as if it had never left them at all.

$28.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)


  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. WrestleCrapRadio.com, WrestleCrap.com, IntestinalFortitude.com
  • URLs not taken: 1. MikeCheckinathimble.com
  • SPEAKING OFs: 2. Internal organs, dying
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • Phone Calls & Run Ins: 4. Filton Whisk, Bill Cosby, Honky Tonk Mail Man, WrestleCrap Fantasy Football Drag Queen
  • Krankor Laughs: 1
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 1
  • Mama’s Broken Damn Damn Damn Dishes:  1
  • Cricket Chirps:  2
  • WrestleCrap Gongs:  2
  • Mike Check Radio Row: 
  • Question of the Week from: Allan in Milwaukee
    • Who will win this years Warrior Award and why will it be Stephanie McMahon? Blade: Nope, Iron Duke.
  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: New Yawn or York?
    The MSG Show.
    Yawn. It was more like War to
    Not Settle the Bore. 
  • Erik Majorwitz’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: One last thing on RDs white:
    Hooker solicits RD.
    What do call such a thing?
    Terrifying Whore-Deal!

WCR Video: The "King Vita Man" Interactive

This is the interactive segment from Wrestlecrap Radio #110 that featured RD and Blade doing commentary on the old "King Vitamin" (or as they call him; "King Pedophile"...which seems like should actually be "Jared's" new nickname) cereal commercials.

Note: We at WCR do NOT actually imply that the old man in this clip is or even portraying a "pedophile", and this is only intended as humor, but I dare you not to laugh when "King Vitamin" (sorry, "Vita Man") making what looks like an "O face" at the 3:58 minute mark! :)

So speaking of "old creeps" (just kidding)...Lord Alfred, if you please:

(Video by Greg Diener)

...And to Mike Check, (*sigh*) King Diamond and King Vita Man are NOT the same guy!

And be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!