Episode 34: Holy Oxygen!: March 27, 2022

Batman Makes the Scenes
May 5, 1966
"With a brainwashed Alfred supplying the information he needs, the Penguin executes his plan against the wealthy social dinner."
63 minutes

"RD is not as lewd as this episode!" 16 years of WrestleCrap Radio disagree with that. He is also back with his cap with his pinball machines. 

The Narrator unintentionally foreshadows one of the girls at the practice dinner being a part of the Penguin's schemes.

Batman immediately starts breathing heavily, reminding RD of current day McMahon. 

Penguin: "They're still breathing. How in the name of purple wombats do they manage that?...Mouse is too much! Let it dip below Butterfly!" 

Cue Penguin and goons working the large bellows while Finella opens her mouth excitedly and bends over in front of it in such a way that it would make current day McMahon breathe even move heavily. (:08) Vince remembers her turning towards the camera to show her camel-toe. He was sad they didn't make a joke about her forgetting her glasses. 

Penguin is so happy he jump-clicks his heels together like False Face. "Butterfly, Batman! Butterfly!" 

Then they all just leave, allowing Batman to all of a sudden open his eyes and breathe normally. As he explains in mid-sentence in Gordon's office, he had "the emergency tank of Bat-oxygen" in his utility belt. That still doesn't explain how he then untied his bonds. RD wondered why he didn't just slow his breathing, which is definitely something the Dark Knight could do. Perhaps the staff were still stuck with Finella. Robin: "Holy oxygen!" O'Hara: "Thank the saints for the utility belt!" Gordon adds some ten dollar words of his own. "What should we do Batman?" RD: "STOP HIM OF COURSE!" Batman tells Gordon to call Bruce on that.

Cut to flat dressed Gordon meeting sharp dressed Bruce at stockbrokers Smith, Smythe, and Schmidt. Bruce reveals the dinner will be held at the Captain's "Salllon" on Wayne Enterprises' S.S. Gotham Neptune.  Gordon calls Batman at Stately Wayne Manor to tell him the location. Then he calls Bruce to ask for his help despite already getting it. RD wonders how Gordon still can't figure out who Batman is.

In the Batcave Batman tells Robin and Alfred that the dinner location has been leaked at "Stately Wayne Manor". The painting style photo of the place actually has "Stately Wayne Manor" written on a sign.Vince reminds RD when he marked out on seeing SWM on a tour (in Pasadena, California). This is all just to feed twitching Alfred false information. Vince wishes he had got full Tourette and starting swearing and gyrating. Alfred leaves to prepare the giant cake for a lady to pop out of. Robin: "Holy Jitterbugs! That twitch again!"

Upstairs Alfred answers a call from the Penguin, causing him to twitch some more while Penguin does some signature squeaks. (:25) He tells him the actual location of the boat and that Miss Natural Resources will win the charity competition. Penguin: "ANSWER YOU SUPERIFIC SERVITOR!" He then releases him from his control. To Finella: "All you gotta do is jump out of that cake and let them throw money at ya!"

Penguin and masked goons then float down on umbrellas to the hotel where Miss Natural Resources is staying and through the ever present power of gas replace her with Finella. Batman comes to take her in a prom suit and with an orchid. "Have you ever popped out of a cake before?" he asks her. Finella has been practicing.

Two hours later the Duo are on the "gaudy" boat on one side of the large dining table eating with everyone. RD compares it to The Last Supper. Vince thinks there was a conspiracy with a crooked picture in the background behind one of the multimillionaires that straightens in later distant shots. Of course at no point do the people wonder where Bruce is; it's not like he's the multimillionaire who owns the boat after all.

Alfred: "Shall I bring in the pièce de résistance, sir?"
Professor: "Peace day resist-stance?"
Robin: "French, sir! It refers to the feature of the evening." 

Meanwhile Batman wipes at his logo with a napkin. 

Penguin watches through a window as the cake adorned with dollar signs is brought out. Vince hope the prop still exists. Finella pops out and of course everyone starts making it rain. At Penguin's prompting she gets an umbrella to gas them, slowly spraying across the area as everyone patiently waits for their turn. 

Taking all the money, Penguin and goons return back to the pier in order to reuse the set. He starts handing it out piece by piece to his goons, leaving his share to invest to do more crimes with. This causes Finella to start crying about being a criminal, despite being rather...aroused earlier when the Duo were captured. "I just wanted to win a beauty contest!...Who is going to save our natural resources now?" 

Off-camera Batman lauds her for learning something as the Duo jump out of a save. "The Dynamic Duo!" shout the goons in unison. They had used "Anti-Penguin gas pills" to protect themselves. Vince wonders if there are specific ones per villain. RD hopes one day to see Batman wearing all his utility belts around him. 

Despite hearing that the Duo are immune to his gas, Penguin tries his luck anyway. He only gets Finella, who Robin moves out of the way before a very short melee. Vince notes how eager Penguin is to get involved in fighting. Vince is reminded of Mike Shaw as Friar Ferguson. The Duo easily net everyone. Batman: "Hoist in your own evil net!"

Back at another party at Stately Wayne Manor, Alfred has a woman on each arm, much to Aunt Harriet's jealousy. (:46) Dick is too shy to talk to Miss Natural Resources. Alfred apologizes for his twitching but Bruce reassures the "old man" that it all worked out anyway. Then Finella walks in escorted by Gordon. She was let out of prison just for one day to wear a mink coat with a very low backside at a party and to fall for Bruce in a penguin walk. 

The late Julie Gregg as Finella was as previously mentioned Sandra Corleone, and was also Tony nominated. RD gives her a "very generous" 7 Batpoles since she didn't really appeal to him. Vince gives her 7.5 for her positioning. 

Unfortunately to the Bros there was very little happening in the episode, besides the bending over. Even worse is the Narrator saying Batman will next re-face Catwoman instead of Art Carney as the Archer. Also the Bros are going to next watch the movie, which will take at least three weeks. Ironically enough Gregg (as someone else) and Catwoman (by someone else) will make an appearance.

RD entertains the people by cutting a promo on how he doesn't have egotistical pictures of himself around.

RD has a few things he wants to cover for their video podcast besides the old series.

Vince is amazed how RD and partners update Wrestlecrap at least weekly, soon to be 22 years young. (:57) His latest reviewed show has a very weird name. But is it as lewd as bent-over Finella?

The two discuss old arcade games for a bit.

 

  • Special Guest Villain: The Penguin [3] (Burgess Meredith) [3]


  • Screen Captures: 1. RD
  • Brown Hornet Escapes: 1. Teleportation with bat-oxygen
  • Fact or Fiction: 1
  • Entertain The People: 1

Episode 33: Holy Wayne Manor!: March 20, 2022

Fine Finny Fiends
May 4, 1966
"The Penguin captures and brainwashes Alfred to be his unwitting pawn for his plan against a wealthy social event."
62 minutes

"RD Wouldn't Eat a Pound of Caviar." He wouldn't wear his cap either, taking it off to show his clean shaven head. He had gone to the Louisville Arcade Expo to use a dot matrix printer. 

Alfred is outside a "small fish store" wondering if he should buy caviar on sale unaware that inside there are goons in drag with fake caviar laying in wait. He enters waving a handbill asking for "20 pounds at least, a pound for each guest," despite normal caviar servings being an ounce, or one sixteenth of a pound. Vince thinks it will all be for Aunt Harriet and her "cankles". The goons then trap Alfred with an umbrella and gas him.

A bunch of cops fill Gordon's office like at the start of the season, determining that an umbrella was in fact used.
O'Hara: "Any ordinary crook, the department can handle. But when it comes to the likes of the Penguin, there's only one bein' on earth..."
The news takes answering Bruce by such surprise he almost drops the Batphone. He tells Dick to set aside his Latin verbs for the time being. Dick: "Holy Wayne Manor! You don't mean our Alfred?"

At the office Batman congratulates O'Hara on his "keen deduction", while Robin wonders why there is no ransom note. O'Hara: "By thunderation, the lad is right!" Batman remembers there will be a secret "multimillionaires' annual award dinner" that Alfred is major-domo for, that Penguin may have kidnapped to find the location of. They go to the fish store to investigate further.

The lair of the "seagoing scoundrels" is in Gotham City Waterfront, where one of them named Octopus is getting rather too intimate with a fish tank. (:18) The Co-Bros find the lady Finella alright (although it would be hard to compete with Pauline) but Vince feels there is something off with the older women on the show compared to the younger ones. (Apparently 28 is old to him.) She argues with Penguin about her swimsuit. Alfred won't tell the location so Penguin threatens him with "super calculated trickery" of making him waddle in his "Penguin Box". This involves putting him in a barbershop chair with Christmas lights and dry ice to "brainwash" him.

Vince keeps seeing sweat on Penguin's prosthetic nose. 

At the fish store Robin tampers with the crime scene by eating some caviar smeared on the wall. Batman finds the handbill for "Knott A Fish" and thus a criminal. They leave to cross the street to the Batmobile. 

Batman: "Remember, Robin: always look both ways."

Gordon tells them that Alfred has been found "safe and sound as a dollar" (not a pound?) in Stately Wayne Manor as O'Hara shakes all the cops' hands in celebration for some reason. Gordon gives him a look before shaking his head.  

In the Batcave the Duo question a now twitching Alfred. 

Alfred: "I don't know what you're talking about; I didn't buy caviar at a fish store. I buy it where I always get it: the Iranian embassy!" 

They take him to the "Memory Bat-Bank" to show him random photos. RD actually tried some image recognition of his own just because. At the Penguin's goons Alfred twitches again, then says he doesn't know who their boss is, then says he has to leave for the rehearsal dinner which is conveniently upstairs. 

At the dinner Bruce has to spend time with someone who looks like Gilligan's Island's Professor wearing the Skipper's cap. (:33) A group of women wear swimsuits including "Miss Natural Resources."
Professor: "I'd like to make her my own personal charity."
Bruce: "All are worthy."
Professor: "You can say that again."

Another person thinks Bruce's great grandfather in a painting was a member of the secretive Yale society Skull And Bones. Bra wearing Aunt Harriet corrects him by saying he actually founded the group (if his name was actually William Huntington Russell or Alphonso Taft and he time traveled from 1832). Alfred and another leer at Miss Civil Rights.

The Professor finds a fish hook in his food. Alfred says it's from his "morning coat". This prompts Bruce and Dick to leave without a word to the Batcave to determine the Penguin is somewhere on the Waterfront which runs for 146 miles before they find a place owned by Knott on the pier. 

Penguin and his unhappy goons somehow know to wait for the Duo, including one goon who goes uncredited for some reason. Penguin: "There's many a slip, so zipper your lip!" They go into their hideout causing the camera to Dutch angle. Finella is in a fishnet swimsuit gushing over Batman, although the Bros still don't fall for her look. Penguin: "Close your gills!"

The Duo find a Penguin statue rolling on a desk. Batman: "This proves he's here." Then some umbrellas fall and trap them momentarily so their stunt doubles can fight for them. Vince is shocked the goons won a fight for once, even if Penguin had his own stunt double with them. (:43) Batman at least reels in one goon with a fishing pole before his takedown. Cue the gas. 

Penguin orders them tied up in a "vacuum tank" with balloons strewn all around while his goons operate gigantic bellows with a helpful sign listing oxygen levels for living creatures. Narrator: "Will they be vanquished by a vac-u-um?"

The two wonder if Alfred is still under the Penguin's twitch without any Bat-antidote.

RD remembers Penguin's bad teeth for some reason.

For now the two give their disapproval for the day's episode.

Vince guesses after a while that Julie Gregg as Finella appeared in The Godfather as Sandra Corleone. 

Vince didn't know RD co-wrote The Death of WCW before he first appeared on WCR. RD told Blade not to ask him a single question on wrestling for his second time.

RD's cereal of choice is Peanut Butter Crunch. Vince has never had it. He prefers Life Cereal.

 

  • Special Guest Villain: The Penguin [3] (Burgess Meredith) [3]


  • Screen Captures: 1. RD
  • Entertain The People: 1

Episode 32: Holy Molars!: March 13, 2022

The Riddler's False Notion
April 28, 1966
"As the Dynamic Duo pursue the Riddler, they discover the true purpose behind his cinematic theme and his ultimate target."
64 minutes

"RD Wishes He Had Robin's Teeth" He reminds Vince of that one guy from Cheap Trick. He remembers that but not what happened this day until he rewatched it (and liked it). RD is confused by Vince's hair.

While Robin remains tied up, Batman rushes back to the Batmobile to find his "tiny utility belt radio" taking up half the seat. Young RD won a transistor radio while on a helicopter ride for a radio station's traffic report. 

Gordon, now recovered from his baseball debate thanks to a Bat-antidote, runs out to apologize for his actions. RD wonders why he doesn't do that every week. Batman: "Let that be a lesson: in the future, be more careful from whom you accept free lemonade." He then starts up the engine only to release a shower of riddles which leads to him to the Gotham lumbar yard. Gordon: "Goodbye Batman! Save the boy!"

He shows up only to find Robin is instead a mannequin and Riddler is wearing a top hat, a handlebar mustache, and a whip. (:12) RD wonders why they didn't just go through with the cutting of the mannequin anyway. 

The goons run off but Batman catches Pauline. "Stop! Surrender! Give yourself up! Or by all that's holy I may forget myself AND DO YOU VIOLENCE!" But he manages to restrain himself to interrogation in Gordon's office as an excuse to distract the audience with another sensual look "hard as nails" by baring her chest and still not wearing a bra. The Co-Bros thus raise their Batpoles to 9, making her the new top lady. 

RD: "Why does Riddler get all the hot chicks?" 

Unable to get anything out of her Batman requests to take her to the Batcave to "work on her". He needs to "Batgas" her to knock out her and Gordon to be a witness "for Robin's safety" and to protect himself from potential litigation. She of course looks and sounds terrified while Gordon is reassured "the sensation is not unpleasant." Then Batman just stacks the bodies on the passenger seat as he takes them. 

As Gordon is utterly amazed by the Bat-technology, Batman gets the "Truth Control Bat-tester" to stick on her face and creep her out. Gordon: "There are those who came to this Batcave and never left!" The two wonder about his covering of one of Riddler's earlier girls dying on the Atomic Pile and wonder if Pauline joined her. To determine if the riddles she has are truthful, Batman tests her "captured breath" to turn a vial red. This leads him to the Chessman building. Gordon: "No wonder you're the nemesis of crime!" So he gasses her again and asks O'Hara to pick up Gordon just laying there on the side of the road. There is no further word on her fate, and one wonders what she may be up to while still a prisoner, given Batman's earlier activity. (Perhaps this is what drew Frank Miller to the franchise.)

This leads to Mrs. Deal's favorite scene where Robin is tied up on a ledge as Riddler prepares to film his fall. (:33) Apparently his scheme here is being paid 1 million dollars for a snuff film (paid for by who?). One goon tries to play a harmonica for music. Batman gets there in time to reassure Robin. Riddler: "CURSES!" He pushes him off as Batman very slowly lowers a Batrope to catch with his teeth.
Robin: "Holy molars! Am I ever glad I take care of my teeth!"
Batman: "True. You owe your life to dental hygiene. If only more people -"
Riddler and Goons interrupt in a helicopter to oddly sky-write a riddle on the El Chief train about to be held-up at the Gotham Central Station.  

Back in the Batcave Robin calls Gordon to update him and to ask him how he feels. Gordon: "Tell Batman it was like waking from a strange refreshing dream." 

Of course the police are going to the wrong place; Riddler is actually dressed up as a cowboy at the mansion of Van Jones pitching him on a silent movie about Batman. RD is amazed that they remembered to remove the sound for it. Van Jones is also amazed and is willing to pay $100,000 for it. Vince thinks the other $900,000 is royalties and back-pay. RD wonders how he will get his check disbursed. (It was the 60s; the first official attempt at anti-money laundering would only come in 1970's Bank Secrecy Act. Perhaps there were a few Congressmen influenced by watching the show.)

Of course Riddler's real target is the films in his vault. Yet as the goons rummage through the vault, a Bat-shadow projects on the wall. The Duo had of course determined he had actually referenced a film about a train robbery. Riddler: "Get them, boys! Get them, or we'll never make it to the border!" The fight barely lasts long enough for Robin to even need to stand up. Riddler is so overwhelmed he doesn't even ask about Pauline's whereabouts. 

At Stately Wayne Manor Aunt Harriet has to leave to a restaurant for her birthday while Alfred fluffs pillows. Vince was saddened she didn't open her jacket. The Duo then come in to surprise her with best wishes before leaving.

RD saw The (recent) Batman at the Skyline and liked it despite its length and subject matter and brightness. (:50)

RD wrote about a basketball game.

RD shows Vince some footage of Gorshin on Dean Martin's show singing and dancing and riddling and giggling and having the time of his life, as one normally should. (:58)


  • Special Guest Villain: The Riddler [4] (Frank Gorshin) [4]
 
  • Screen Captures: 2. RD, RD
  • Entertain The People: 1

Episode 31: Holy Triple Feature!: March 6, 2022

Death in Slow Motion
April 27, 1966
"The Riddler is back, and is pursuing a silent movie theme with his latest scheme."
71 minutes

"The Great" "RD: Also Not Wearing a Bra" Does that make Vince surly Alfred? RD is in his library since his normal shooting area is currently occupied. He and Mrs. Deal will go as the Dynamic Duo to the church's appreciation dinner. 

RD also confused Vince by asking him if 60s bras were expensive and making him excited enough to watch the episode at 4 am looking for Aunt Harriet. RD thinks he should pay a visit to the "oculist". Vince considers RD a brother regardless, even if he felt misled (and also from the baseball lock-out (and also conflict in Europe)). 

A silent black and white movie plays in a theater that's not in a baseball stadium or Ukraine but Washington Center "THE PLACE for arts in Gotham City!" (:13) And yet, despite the movie being at "The End" the Narrator is unconvinced. "This title is not correct! It's not The End, but The Beginning! The cue for one of the most baffling crime waves to ever confront the Dynamic Duo!"

Vince can't help but see the bad skin of the actors in High Def.  

In the lobby an old guy named Van Jones who looks like Mr. Freeze talks about the silent movies he owns. He is interrupted by Riddler walking in as Charlie Chaplin followed by goons as Keystone Cops unnoticed (and who are more actual cops than the normal ones). He meets his girl Pauline who does not immediately impress the Co-Bros with her wig. Together they dance a random gig that causes the sound of laughter to be piped in while the actual onlookers stare silently. Riddler then uses the distraction to gas the box office lady to steal her money (all $200 of it) and is "arrested" by his Cops while the people continue to applaud. Van Jones is not impressed by the "group of amateurs".

Gordon in his office immediately deduces it is "the prince of puzzlers, the master of criminal conundrums" and gets to the Batphone. Vince wonders what good their prison is at reform. This time Bruce himself picks up, again, and Gordon doesn't put two and two together, again. 

Dick: "Holy triple feature! Won't that crook ever learn?" 

As they go to the Batpoles they almost trip on each other. Bruce: "Excuse me." 

In the office Robin can figure the riddle that they will next hit Mother Gotham's Bakery because he can "dig musicans' slang", and Batman has to explain this to the "astonishing" policemen. (:30) 

At the Bakery Riddler confirms with his goons and cavewoman attire Pauline that the silent films are a distraction from their actual crimes. RD was confused by her attempt to look "poor" but she looked much better than the earlier scene, making him wonder if they changed actresses. She uses the dress to distract the baker at begging, then uses her shawl to make him pretend he's stuck in flypaper. Riddler blows her a kiss as he and the goons cause havoc causing a cartoon "WHACK!" 

RD: "Are you in agreement that something's going on between Pauline and Riddler? Do you think when they're getting intimate she says "riddle me this?"

Riddler hits another worker with a sleeping cream pie and a "nuts to you!" They blow up a safe with an explosive eclair and his safecracking skills, but before they leave they make sure the Duo are coming in first. They record them as they enter and see the pie. Batman: "Mother Gotham never baked this pie!" Another riddle of a "dishonest shortcake" leads them to the Branch Library on Baker Street. Vince mumble sings for some reason.

The Batmobile pulls up to another vehicle equally illegally parked, but Batman points out its diplomatic plates. The library is closed Wednesdays due to "lack of funds". Millionaire Batman: "Shocking." They use a Batkey to enter anyway where a giant book of silent films falls on them with more riddles. Unable to solve them for some reason the Duo decide to return to the Batcave to examine them in a magnifying glass. 

The Riddler's lair is an abandoned film studio where the goons watch Riddler constantly rewatch the Duo get hit by a giant book.

Alfred joins the Duo in the Batcave to figure out an answer is "dead pans". (:47) RD sings about Van Jones for some reason, who will have a viewing party of deadpan comedy while drinking lemonade. Riddler and goons are already there spiking the drink with "temperance liquid", reminding RD of a Popeye cartoon where Bluto sent him "punch cologne" that would cause people to punch him. In the end Popeye also punched himself, ah gyuk gyuk gyuk gyuk. 

Gordon and O'Hara are also affected while they are talkin' baseball.
Gordon: "Maury Will's better than Honus Wagner?"
O'Hara: "Fifty times better!"
Gordon: "You're an ignorant oaf, Chief O'Hara! I wonder why I keep you in my department!"
O'Hara: "Your Royal Highness, oftentimes I wondered why I don't resign!"
RD did research for once which made him agree with Gordon. I'm just glad they didn't have their argument involving sabermetrics. 

Batman's stunt double bumps into Pauline so she can call actual Batman "you clumsy brute!" 

Gordon: "The BORES a man in my position has to tolerate! Is it worth it? NYAHHHHHHH!"

Cue everyone fighting or cheering those fighting. Batman tries to tell Robin monitoring in the Batmobile but gets interrupted by Pauline (who is dressed as Bo Peep for some reason) who gasses him. Batman raises his arms dramatically as he calls for order from the citizens, then chases the Riddler's cameramen who miss their shots at him. Gun shots, not camera shots. 

But Riddler has Robin tied up to a conveyor belt leading into a circular saw about to slice him in two.

It was then that RD saw how perky Pauline was. He had to lighten his screenshot slightly so Vince can see it and assume West was all over her. RD gives her earlier redhead look 6 Batpoles, 6.5 as Bo Peep, and an "easy" 8.5 for this natural braless look. Vince gives her 9. Sherry Jackson started as a child actor (with a long run on The Danny Thomas Show) who transitioned into a few guest roles (including an appearance in a rather awkward episode of The Original Series Star Trek) before retiring in the 80s to become an acting teacher. 

Riddler is so happy he does a backflip and sets the conveyor belt speed to Real Fast."You said Batman would be here in no time, but will he be here IN time?" Then he gasses him again just because. 

RD shows Vince's books hanging around him and asks for his signature.


  • Special Guest Villain: The Riddler [4] (Frank Gorshin) [4]
 
  • SPEAKING OFs: 1. Church
  • Blue Van:
  • Screen Captures: 1. RD