Rowdy Roddy Piper's Corona Virus Tips

By R.V.M Kai



With all the rules and strict guidelines that the world has had to follow due to the recent outbreak of the Corona Virus (aka Covid-19) pandemic, it started making me think about Rowdy Roddy Piper's Halloween Tips (for some reason?), which were basically Hot Rod's rules for kids to follow to stay safe when 'Trick or Treating' from back in the 1980's (the video clip is above). It prompted me to Tweet RD Reynolds and Blade Braxton of Wrestlecrap Radio, since they were always big fans of Roddy's Halloween Tips, about wishing that Piper was alive today, during a difficult time like this, just so we could have gotten his version of "Corona Virus Prevention Tips". Seeing that we at wrestlecrapradio.com do not have a SeanceTrolla (I think Mike Check's daughter may have it and bought it for a bargain at a yard sale?), I thought I'd try to come up with what I think Roddy Piper's Covid-19 Tips may sound like:


"I wanna tell ya people somethin', because preventing the spread of Corona Virus means something to me. People dying, there's bunches of them. There's a couple of rules you follow when it comes to Covid-19. And these are the rules and ya gonna follow them because Hot Rod said so:

#1 First of all, when you go out there, ya gonna wash your hands because people could be sick, and there's IDIOTS not covering their mouths when they cough, and those Idiots are gonna cough all over the place! Some of them don't care, so you gotta take care of yourself!

#2 Now ya ain't gonna go and knock on people's doors who have Corona Virus, or you'll get sick. And you ain't gonna go inside nobody's house when they offer you their hand for you to shake! Ya gonna stay on the doorstep, and ya gonna stand three feet away and ya gonna say "PLEASE AND THANK YA"!

#3 Now when ya order ya food from a restaurant, whatcha gonna do is ya gonna TAKE YA FOOD, BACK HOME to your family, before you eat it!

#4 Then whatcha gonna do is ya gonna have lots of fun in self-isolation, so by October, ya'll be able to have a Happy Halloween and Trick Or Treat."



See you all next week everybody, so long!


R.I.P Roddy Piper (1954 – 2015)

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