044 What If...Corporal Kirchner was still alive?: November 3, 2006

What If...Corporal Kirchner was still alive?
(80 minutes)

Sad News: Corporal Kirchner died, according to WWE dot com.

Weird World of Wrestling has returned. Tease Club. RD doesn't like strip clubs because he was made fun of at one. (:12) RD talks about males being undressed at strip clubs. Blade remembers when his girlfriend called him for some random pictures of a wrestler she found on his computer.

In December, Rewriting the Book will debut. Jed Shaffer is on the phone to talk about it. (:20)

RD's Trip to the Grocery (:31): RD plopped some ice cream in someone's bag. Fun-sized bars are not fun. Blade looks like a hobo. RD was Magnum PI this Halloween, complete with glue-on mustache.

Obscure Wrestling News (:41): 30000 dumb people have bought Brooke Hogan's CD. Egomania is heritable. Among their releases (:47) WWE will release a Rey Mysterio Jr DVD called the Biggest Little Man. WWE will release a Wrestling's Greatest Families DVD. Vampiro will release a DVD about Vampiro.  [... in Canada.]

Mail Bag: Daisy Tweeter (WrestleCrap Listener #25) makes a Batista pun. (:53) Zack Gator wants Vickie Guerrero to appear in Playboy. (:55) RD explains James from Kentucky, who wants Vince's phone number. (:57)

RD's favorite wrestling show is now TNA. (:59) Vince Russo's Invitational Inverted Battle Royal: 15 men try to climb in, 7 men throw 5 out, and then a one on one match. The Boogeyman has returned.

Blade hit the bottle because Lita may leave WWE. (:67)

Corporal Kirchner calls "you horse's ass". He sounds an awful lot like John Thomas. (:70)

Corporal Kirchner's All American Haiku:
I'm Corporal Kirchner.
I'm fucking alive, not dead.
My career's dead. AAAHHHHH.

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)


  • The Mike Von Erich to my Fritz Von Erich, Mr. Blade Braxton
  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Global Internet, Madison Carter
  • URLs not taken: 0.
  • SPEAKING OFs: 7. Websites hosted by Global Internet, awesome guys, you being the man, wetting yourselves in joy, insecure, that, Hulk Hogan’s money
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • Outdated references: 1. E.T. The Extraterrestrial on the Atari 2600
  • I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.
  • Phone Calls & Run Ins: 2. Jed Shaffer, Corporal Kirchner
  • F-Bombs: 4. Blade (3), Corporal Kirchner

  • RD Time Outs: 1
  • Krankor Laughs: 1

  • Mailbag
    • Daisy Tweeter: Hello RD and Blade, WrestleCrap Radio Listener #25 here. My question is: since Batista is known as the Animal, and is currently doinking Rebecca DiPietro, does that mean she is in Batistiality? No need to answer.
    • Zack Gator: Should Vickie Guerrero be the next WWE Diva to do Playboy? Blade subscribes to Plump magazine.
    • James from Kentucky: Do you have Vince McMahon's home number? Because I keep phoning his office and he doesn't return my calls. P.S. could you say hi to my friend Alex in Puerto Rico? Hello Alex.

  • Blade Braxton’s Corporal Kirchner's All American Haiku: Corporal Kirchner fills in after murdering Sergeant Haiku Blade.
    I'm Corporal Kirchner.
    I'm fucking alive, not dead.
    My career's dead. AAAHHHHH.

No comments: