122 Bound For Glory Holes: October 10, 2008

Not The Kimberly Page Head That Blade Wanted
This Week's Rating: 1.0
(88 minutes)
Written by Premier Blah

Big celebration of TNA here at Wrestlecrap! Pac Man Jones inducted as part of the festivities, while the three Classic Inductions are all TNA related. It Came From YOUTUBE! features some weird TNA remix video with Dave Meltzer, Someone Bought This are some random T-Shirts as if sold from some TNA Garage Sale, and the Jobber of the Week is the previousy inducted Mr. X.

New Navy recruit Peter Gazer is mentioned barely one minute in. RD remarks on the bondage-themed names of TNA's PPVs, and suggests changing TNA's name to the more dignified S&M. (:03) RD already has Peter's new replacement for TNA news after a week of intensive search for the "ultimate TNA fan" for "100% wrestling news". I'm surprised the crickets didn't start chirping in response. Blade tries to sing Pat Benatar. (:07) Speaking of Blade singing karoake...he is still recording tracks with the Hobo Six as we speak. (:10) The Wrestlecrap Archive Disc Volume 2 will be ready to be pre-ordered from next week.

RD's Trip to the Grocery World Food Aisle: RD prepares for an upcoming business trip to Germany and the Netherlands by pondering the notion of a Dutch wrestler with wooden shoes (what, not a pot smoker wearing tulips? For shame!) while eating some Stroop Koekjes, literally syrup cookies (:20). Those things are delicious, let me tell you. Cue your standard quips about eating in a sexual manner.

Obscure Wrestling News/Sad News Hybrid: The Sandman retiring causes Blade to drink. (:24) RD believes Blade forgot the discussion of his son Twisted Sand starting his own wrestling career; of course RD himself forgets that that was the episode where Triple Kelly filled in for a missing Blade, so neither side is in the right here. The Warrior's ex-wife is trying to publish a tell all book about their marriage. (:28) This of course leads to a six-minute digression of Blade buying Kimberly Page's head, this week's Interactive Segment. RD wonders if Blade used the head as some sort of second foreskin/penis head, and further grinds the show to a halt by imagining the Warrior with a double-donger. Yeah, you're not missing much. Goodnight everybody!

The brother of Smackdown's Eve, AKA the Anonymous Brooke clone who won the 2007 Diva Search (yeah I don't remember her either), won $100,000 on Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?. (:38) Blade's passionate reading of her statement reminds RD of "Rambo" Greg Gagne. Here's a thought, why isn't HE on the show? License to print money I say.

Sources have told RD that the Shockmaster is getting his own action figure (:48), though whether or not royalties to George Lucas have to be paid for the stormtrooper helmet remain to be seen. (Perhaps he can be this generation's King Haiku; "Does not come with helmet as illustrated.") Dangerous Danny Davis and Trish Stratus are also getting their own figures, if you're interested.

Dream Analysis: Blade dreams of talking to Mickie James about Transformers in his moon van. (:52) I'm surprised he didn't compare her to a Ford Mustang. Don Mason once ate his own roofies. (:60) RD wonders if he even exists, forgetting entirely his role in Blade's Revenge of the Black Scorpion movie.

Speaking of people probably existing Schrödinger-style the latest TNA Correspondent Nathaniel Edward Rodham Davis, enters with the TNA intro end-tailed with an explosion. (:61) Prophetic much? For those of you unable to listen to this latest atrocity in WCR history he's essentially Randy Baer with a high-pitched geek/nerd/poindexter tone of voice. Also known as a white Urkel. It's unfortunate my Montreal Canadiens stein is not filled with some V8 and Miller Lite, I don't think I can finish this thing sober (No joke, I bought one the other day. It's really neat). Do yourself a favor and don't waste 12 [!!!] minutes of your life like I did, skip to 73 minutes and the Question of the Week.

This week's "Question" ("trapped in 2002", much like our good friends here) (:73) is again not answered interrupted by Nathaniel CONSTANTLY RINGING IN!!! Sigh. Ken the Major Danger Ranger's 4th attempt to send in a question is about referees. RD gets out of answering it by having the phone ring again. RD and Blade need Titantrons of the Crickets for the Archive Disc.

Current (and Music-less) Wrestling News: Smackdown's ratings have dropped to 1.9 (:78). Let's hope the return of the Boogeyman brings them back up. Blade remembers the good old days of wrestling when things were good and the radio progrem had not begun yet. Santino may wrestle Roddy Piper, Goldust, or the Honky Tonk Man, depending on your votes for Cyber Sundays/Taboo Tuesdays. (:82) Kelly Kelly is poised to pose for Playboy. No word on whether she'll do any handstands for the shoot though.

Seventeen barely able to Strip Syllables:
Kelly Kelly nude.
What's next? Anonymous Brooke
spreads in Beaver Hunt.

That phone ringing is going to haunt my nightmares, let me tell you.

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