The following is a Public Service Announcement from -
Angry Jim, ya sons-of-bi...scolded dawgs! (You can't pay me enough to curse!)
How ya doin' tonight nerds?!...Agh! Who am I kiddin'?!, It's only 12 listeners as far as I know, and some of ya ain't even left yer mamma's basement yet!
Anyway, my name is Angry Jim! Ya'll know me from my time on WCW and WWE, Oklahoma Sooners, and the maker of the world's finest barbeque sauces known ta man! But more recently, I'm stuck pirate callin' some fu...HOARABIL rasslin' radio show hosted by two dic...guys who don't know which way the sun rises each mornin', as well as sometimes writin' for a site that's run by a group of jacka...I mean...jokers! AND they haven't even paid me for my time yet, despite repeated requests from me to do so?! I mean, I coulda asked them to pay for what I did cause it ain't come cheap! Lawd knows I need the money instead of thes' freeloaders taking others' hard earned livin' and usin' them to make HORABIL dick jokes about -
Premier Blah: [off 'camera', exasperated] Jim, can we please just get on with this? Wasn't it you who requested this post space in the first place?
Yeah yeah yeah, I'm gettin' to that part, can't you just hold ya horses!? *Sigh*. Godda...darn kids these days! What's wrong with 'em? Bunch of nancy pansy luvin' -
Alright already, will ya just shuv it?!
Anyway, a year ago - GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY, a year?! I don't think Hollywood John even lasted that long and he couldn't even pull his head out of his aahh...er...butt?! Anyway, a year ago, the site's old domain wrestlecrapradio.com expired like an old bottle of stale barbeque sauce due to tha site's owners bein' complete shi...doodooheads and not payin' attention to what they're doin'! Heh, kinda like WCW's last days when that coc...chicken plucker; Ed Ferrara was runnin' around pretendin' ta be me!
And speaking of Ed Ferrara, I wish it was that no good hillbilly instead of this...Japanese man or whoever it was who has th' ba...brains to call himself my cousin...Prime Minister Blah, or whatever the flop your name is?!
Premier: Premier Blah. I've told you like ten times already. Didn't whoever you're working with now gave you my credentials?
Ah, shove it, Primer Bra, it's you and my cousin, that soy sauce eatin', sumo wrestlin', robot fu...makin' Jimmycheese Rossini? Gawd darn-it I can't even spell his name right. Don't they have good ol' ENGLISH up where he comes from like any good ol' boy country has like -
Premier: Jimichiro Rosshu. That was his name.
Yeah yeah whatever. You think I care?
So he buys tha domain to make us all gawd darn-it mad! And what does he do? He posts about HIS sexual performance. That's MY gimmick gawd darn-it!
Premier: He did. RVM even managed to grab a hold of him to ask him about it. You even called to vent against him as far as I can remember, Jim. Still I didn't know he had marital problems too. Is that a family thing?
Ah shove it up your fluffer Bra!
Anyway my cousin is more of an idiot than even you, RD, or Blade, and you barely have enough ba...brain cells to share among ya. HE lets his site expire too like a di...dam.
Premier: Which is when I decided to try my luck again and see if I could get it back. I had Clarence spend...a couple of hours on it, as the whole thing was easier and quicker than either of us expected. I mean, if I had known it would be THIS easy I'd have done it far earlier.
That's what you get for being a lazy son of a -
Premier: [ignoring Jim] So the old .com domain name is hopefully back for good this time. Both that and the .blogspot.com URLs should hopefully lead to the same place, inconsistencies here and there notwithstanding of course.
I WAS a bit surprised when Jim offered to help get it back and even paid a bit to reclaim the url though. It was very...uncharacteristic of him. I mean, you go on and on about not getting paid by me, RD, or Blade for your trouble and yet you do this almost charitable thing, if only to stroke your ego somewhat at the same time too?
Ah I didn't do it for you ya coc...cockerel! I wanted ta prove to ma no good cousin that no matter how many crappy robots he makes or monsters he creates or whatever they do sitting on their as...butts over there in Japan, that no matter what he does we Yankees will always put them in their place. Just like when we won WW2 and bombed Hir-
Premier: Sorry for interrupting your Oscar speech Jim, but I have to take this. ... Hello?
Jimichiro Rosshu: AAAGGGGHHH! Premier Blah-san! You bring dishonor and great shame to Jimichiro for hack-destroy Jimichiro Rosshu website Resucrapuadio! I -
Yeah yeah yeah, Agh, go -
Premier: No, let me take it from here Jim. Jimichiro your company bought our domain name and all you did with it for the year that you had it was write three articles about not having sex with your wife?...Really? Nothing more than that? Like writing about -
Writin' about stir-frying or sex robots or sumo tag team championships or whatever you people do there for fun?
Premier: ... what he said to some extent. Without all those random stereotypes he just threw out of course.
Jimichiro Rosshu: AAAGGGGHHH! None of business what I write! I suffer dishonor and shame for this and become demotion from one of 40 assistant manager to one of 80 assistant assistant manger at Fukya Selfu Robotics! Now Jimichiro wish to restore honor by choppy choppy Blah-san and redneck Jim-san pee-pee!
Go fluff yourself! You're not cuttin' off ma penis you son of a -
Premier: ... Guys, Guys, there's a much better way to settle this. Quickly, get Clarence Mason on the phone!
Jimichiro Rosshu: You want sue Jimichiro Blah-san!? I get "Ace Attorney" Naruhodou-san to sue you! And then I kicka your (*phone cuts out*)
Aaaaah go Fukushima yourself ya piece of shii...take! You and your 80 assistant to the assistant to the assistant of whoever stir-fries your sushi in that company of yours! Let me tell you somethin', there may be 80 of you cooks but only one of me! And I have an 80 year old cripple, Bob Caudle, as my cooking assistant!
And you Bra! When will YOU pay me for doing you a favor ya coc...cockarel? Darn it, do I have to get John Thomas on th' phone to get my money's worth?
Premier: Oh boy...Blah here. Mr. Thomas I presume?
Premier: I knew I should have stayed in bed this morning...
The preceding Public Service Announcement has been brought to you by...
JR's Dark Journey Mahogany Barbeque Sauce! Try some today, and you'll be loving every minute of it. Includes a free pair of Dark Journey Head Scissors!
[To Be Continued...]