 |
| Ooooooooohhhhhhh! |
RD enjoys watching a lot of Prime Time Wrestling, the only place where Mr. X could win a match and be taken seriously, according to Blade. As expected WWE is doing a terrible job of showing episodes so RD has to watch them himself.
Blade wanted Heenan to cross dress like Ms. Elizabeth. Does that make Monsoon Savage (the Monsoon Man) and try to keep Heenan locked away in their never ending feud?
Unlike Blade, RD is "not familiar with Mean Gene Okerlund's O Face" (his climax sound to be sure) so Blade has to (repeatedly) audibly demonstrate for him. (:07) Save that for the Coliseum Video theme before you prematurely ejaculate, pal. (...Which they do, actually.)
For a change my shilling this time is shorter, but alas I realize too late I forgot the URL. Not that it's important for a website or anything like that. Then again, if you didn't know it dear reader (all one of you) you wouldn't be here reading this either. To his credit RD repeats it a few times to make it hit the magic 30 second mark, which makes it sound like I've climaxed multiple times like Mean Gene earlier. (:12) In response The Intestinal Fortitude has its own new ad copy. Sadly RD does not do his Jeff Foxworthy...this time.
Blade remembers the first time RD went on a TRIP...to the Library all those summers ago. (:17) Reminder: Blade also went to the Library too (where he met a candy wielding child molester).
RD forgot a third snack from the Netherlands: Tijgernootjes. They look like bacon cheese infused corn covered peanuts (to him; to me they look like rather small scrotum - they really need better packaging over there) and taste rather good, although he can't put down why exactly the taste is so familiar. Thankfully he does not make an O Face while savoring them.
:24 SPEAKING OF corn Blade remembers when Paul Ellering almost lost an eye. Ah, those were happier and simpler times indeed, no? His daughter Rachel is training in WWCR friend and fine young egg Lance Storm's wrestling school in Calgary...
...Alberta, Canada. (Sorry, it was just my turn to make that joke and I couldn't just pass it up.) RD has been trying to get him on their show again in the past year and a half.
Savio Vega is finally getting his due and appearing in WWE 2K16. (:26) Sad News brought to you by Nintendo John (on the Nintendo): the game is not being ported to the (Nintendo) Wii U or the (Nintendo) 3DS (both old (Nintendo) 3DS and new New (Nintendo) 3DS - or was that new (Nintendo) New 3DS? I always get that mixed up). Anyway Nintendo John confuses RD more than Nintendo's current corporate strategy...on the Nintendo. (Insert Nintendo John's audience cheering here.)
The Rock is pregnant. Well, his lady is. Thankfully the Duo get through without talking about any prospective Junior remake (to be made by WWE Films as a favor to a Hall Of Famer no doubt). (:37) RD and I remember Johnson was married before, and I believe that (thankfully) they still seem to be on good terms as they co-own his production company. Sad News: I don't believe her married family name was Rock like Blade thinks it was.
Much like how Blade's random Iron Mark Tyson impersonation gave life to his later character, RD uses his high pitched Football Fan voice from last episode (The WrestleCrap Fantasy Football Drag Queen as he terms her) to 'advise' fantasy football players to use Packers WR Jordy Nelson. (:40) Blade is reduced to speechless laughter. I'm speechless too - Jordy Nelson has been on Injured Reserve since the start of the season and would be as effective in your team as I would be if I suddenly became QB. To be fair I would probably do better than whoever is currently doing that in Jacksonville.
(I am also left wondering if she and Popeye will start double calling into the show from now on. *Shudder*)
RD is in turn rendered speechless by the courts issuing Tammy a warrant for her arrest for failing to attend a court hearing for her (most recent?) DUI. (:43)
Mike Cantalano thinks WWCR is Facebook Support for some reason. (:47) RD begs for better Questions like he's on a charity fundraise drive. Didn't they raise the idea of doing that one time? (Of which we have all completely forgotten about?)
:50 TNA might be dead. For real this time. No mostly dead or half dead or being stone dead in a minute. Also, you know a promotion is bad when an average house show is more surreal than a Monty Python sketch. I'm shocked we haven't got a gimmick of someone Silly Walking in the ring yet. They still have time until the end of the year though, so it's not too late!
Sting is still wrestling at 56 years old. (:56) As much as I respect them both greatly as true wrestling legends...I don't want Sting to become another Ric Flair. We don't need ANOTHER wrestler who walks around losing his pants faster than Walter White. Although now I want to see Bryan Cranston guest host RAW (sponsored by the fine folks at Los Pollos Hermanos) in one of his contamination suits, clothesline Vince, then take off the head piece to show he's been wearing his Heisenberg Hat all this time. License to print money...which he will then store in a barrel that he buries in the New Mexico desert.
RD: "This is his chance to win the WWE title along with all those WCW titles. In other words, it's his chance to butter his bread at both tables."
Blade: "Oh, you're right Jim."
Then they laugh out loud.
Seventeen Syllables Easily Digestible:
Sting and John Cena.
Brand new tag team? Dudes with Att-
-itude Adjustments.
$28.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
- WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 4. WrestleCrap.com, WrestleCrapRadio.com, TheIntestinalFortitude.com, Drive In Movie Maniacs
- URLs not taken: 1. TigerNutty.com
- SPEAKING OFs: 4. Euros, Europe, corn, corn (2)
- Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
- Phone Calls & Run Ins: 3. Premier Blah, “Nintendo” John, WrestleCrap Fantasy Football Drag Queen
- Krankor Laughs: 1
- RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 3
- Mama’s Broken Damn Damn Damn Dishes: 1
- Nintendo 8 Bit Pops: 12
- Question of the Week from: Mike Cantalano
- When you die, what happens to Facebook? Just wondering. Khan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Blade: Mark Zuckerberg lights a candle in your honor.
- Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Fusion of the old with the new babyface:
Sting and John Cena.
Brand new tag team? Dudes with Att-
-itude Adjustments.
No comments:
Post a Comment