263 Headless Centaur: October 27, 2016

Uncle Boo needs that
extra spoonful.
71 minutes

Blade is the ECW Zombie (RIP) to RD's WCW Phantom (also RIP). The former talked to their 'producers' who 'told him' to turn down his mic volume to once again become Jazz Overnight, much to the latter's delight.

RD then abruptly receives a 'certified letter' from the Trolla Corporation. Yes, an actual mailed letter. Recent budget cuts you see. (:05) They are recalling their (one) HorseTrolla 'notification device' due to mythical centaur related concerns. He doesn't believe them; they still need to do some shenanigans since April Fools after all! (Yeah that wasn't an April Fool's Joke. I had Chris Engler send that letter. I mean we did create Zombie Nathaniel. --Raging_Demons) So when it neighs up it sounds slower and fails to deliver any news. Wait, is it a news machine or a breaking down car? Of course RD dismisses the whole thing as mere happenstance, even as he tempts fate throughout by running it every now and then.

Blade: "Are we going to get on with the episode now or what?"

Then he breaks into laughter. (:11) RD then has to explain to him the concept of soaping.

RD self-shills for donations with his Nathaniel impression. Help a brother or two out? (:14) Blade repeats his idea of a pledge drive/telethon with his Stubby impression. Raging_Demons does his part to shill for this here website with his Premier Blah impression. ("I'm officially the voice of Halloween! Also if I knew I was going to be used again I would had updated it with this year's "Halloween Hootenanny on The Mike Check Show where Mike & his daughter have to survive the horror that is...Zombie Nathaniel!" --Raging_Demons)(:19) The eternal Roddy Piper provides his ever useful Halloween safety tips in his Nada impression.

Blade has yet to find some Captain Crunch Halloween Cereal, much to RD's shock. (:21) Blade wishes him a Merry Christmas, as many people preemptively do in October. As this is an election year Monster Cereals allow people to vote on their mascots. Sadly, his Boo Berry is as of this writing currently taking a huge beating from Count Chocula (though at least independent candidate Franken Berry is not posing any challenge to them both, only having Montana and its state population of 5 people to his name.). The duo agree Piper should get his own special Halloween "Please and Thank Ya" trading cards.

The FaxTrolla is still working to RD's pride. Blade wants to run cliffhangers that have no chance in Hades of working. (:33) WWE is promoting TMNT figure variations of their wrestlers superstars. RD is flabbergasted that people would want to spend $15 on them instead of supporting their site. WWE also runs some sort of 'hilarity' using zombified versions of their wre - superstars on their page using jokes from the 90's WWF magazine. RD does his Crickets impression.

RD advises Blade not to send him any Tamm related gifts. RD then has to explain to him (again) the concept of soaping. (:41) Sad News: she's in jail "forever" according to Blade's insights. RD uses it as an excuse to no longer talk about her or listen to Debbie Reynolds sing about her.

Not to be outdone, Blade uses some bad MIDI (which sounds even worse than the standard fare) to talk about Paige. RD's disgust makes Blade break into laughter. (:46) The week prior she had proposed to Alberto Del Rio in the middle of the ring. Blade compares his bad indie wrestling gimmicks to RD's bad indie wrestling gimmicks.

For some reason (and not because it's on the itinerary) Blade persuades RD to call up Jim who also seasons greetings them. (:53) He's doing all the holidays at once to save time and money. Sadly he no longer has his UWF Haunted House running. RD's laughter breaking causes Jim to also laughter break. Bob Caudle messed something up which Jim has to handle, among so many other things going wrong in his life (like hiring an extremely old man as his sole employee).

ECW Press is again wanting RD to write The Death Of TNA, and with the further shenanigans it's going through yet again and once more, he thinks of the 'wrestling' company as the perfect horror movie villain. Just when you think they're down and out they get right back up!...although in their case it's a movie villain no one wants to see. Even more than that time Jason Voorhees went into space to reenact a bad Alien rip-off. (:62)

Piper once more tells Blade to send your poisoned and razor bladed treats to Vince McMahon to transform him into Moolah. (:66)

*Play for full effect.*
Mickie James (now on NXT) confuses Blade with her appearance. This time (of course) the HorseTrolla comes to life and roves around the place (instead of floating like an apparition SHOULD be doing) wrecking havoc like a low rent Thin Man's sphere. That or RD is also playing a Shin Megami Tensei/Persona game for the first time and was caught off-guard by the series' notorious difficulty.

So here we go, Seventeen Syllables:
RD is now dead.
I did not know he was sick.
Headless HorseTrolla.

Then Blade breaks into laughter.



$28.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right 

2 comments:

Ben Hall said...

At 0.27.47 RD spells his name as "RD REYNODLS"

Premier Blah said...

Fascinating.
I think all of us doing stuff related to this show has done a number on our ways of thinking. AND spelling at times.