"Season" In Review 2005 - 2006: The Golden Guys

"If anybody's still listening to this I have to ask you why." (RD Reynolds)

It seems like a good idea. The man behind a well known wrestling site wants to try his hand at doing a podcast, and he does it with the help of the guy who won a contest because he worships the Black Scorpion. Sure, it may not be exactly just about wrestling. Anyone who knows anything about wrestlecrap.com knows it's about the WORST in professional wrestling and the humor that can be derived from that, so it's not exactly the Wrestling Observer we're talking about here. But RD Reynolds and his Co-Host on the other end of the tin can and string, Mr. Blade Braxton, certainly know a thing or two about a thing or two about wrestling, and with their unique insights into the industry and their own thoughts and opinions about what's been going down week after week, it may prove a rather fascinating listen. And for a while, it actually was.

Ten minutes in Blade talks about watching an episode of Maude.

It all went downhill from there.

Even with that 'misstep' though, WrestleCrap Radio has been rather enjoyable in its maiden year. RD & Blade have looked at wrestling in an often humorous light. They poked fun at many a ludicrous thing going on in the squared circle. They read haikus. They read submitted questions (but failed to actually answer them). They talked to John Tenta, Vince Russo, and Dr. Keith Lipinski. They had people 'call in' despite not giving out a number and not being live (recording the show after the fact). They gushed mightily over Kurt Angle.

And of course, they've talked about 70's TV shows as much as can humanely be possible.

That being said, their latest episode on their one year anniversary was somewhat...bizarre. Obviously the re-appearance of bill collector John Thomas 'calling in' to their show somehow is good for a laugh or two. But Blade not even changing his voice to mess around with RD just to make a bad pun? Spending time answering obvious trick questions? Wasting  half an hour on ineligible "impressions" of Terry Funk and Dennis Stamp?
One hopes this is just a one off thing of them goofing around for no reason or other after having the show survive for one year. After all, they did have some strange 'callers-in' on their April Fools episode so it would fit that they would mess about and try it again here. And, it IS WrestleCrap. You're not really expecting the hottest wrestling scoops here, not unless you find a way to resurrect Al Isaacs.

And if you do find a way, contact us. We could make good money off it.

05 - 06 Episode By Episode

#001 Pilot (August 12)
Being the Co-Hosts initial outing, it is not surprising that they are haphazard in how they went about it, talking about those 70's shows, 'taking over' Get In The Ring, and wondering why people are still listening to them after meandering for 20 minutes. It's not Encounter At Farpoint bad, thankfully, which is a slight plus. Now, if that pilot featured Bea Arthur...

#002 Mommy's Milk (August 19)
The show picks up noticeably here. Though it's less due to any actual wrestling discussion and more about the popularity of Dennis Stamp, someone with a mustache among the strangely varied contestants of the Diva Search, the failure to answer someone's submitted question in an excuse to give away Dusty Rhodes' autobiography, some nonsense about Hulk Hogan nursing Shawn Michaels, and Blade trying to read a haiku through his cracking up. However it is to the show's credit, and makes it funnier than it should have any right to be.

#003 Tee Hee Tickle Party (August 26)
The "Tee Hee Tickle Party" continues, with RD taking time to talk about going to the library, Brian Knobbs' babysitting skills being debated, and more talk about Gene Snitsky than is healthily needed. Also RD has to remind people that he's not a Juggalo.

#004 Speaking Of... (September 16)
Speaking of things that are talked about more than is healthily needed, the Co-Hosts return after two weeks 'off' to talk about Kane's 'autobiography', old Apter magazines, and one rather strange dream. It's all very bizarre.

#005 Raw Homecoming (September 23)
Much time is spent about another 70's related dream, some wrestlers' absurd gimmicks, a "homecoming" of wrestling legends that are still not as old as some of the references the Co-Hosts have made, and something about Warrior's DVD. Sadly it's not hosted by RD and Blade.

#006 Self-urinating ReCrap (September 30)
After all the excitement from the earlier week things are more quiet here. Still, RD and Blade do their best in talking about Boo Berry, of all things.

#007 Flipping a stuffed bird (October 7)
RD and Blade resume their discourse by gushing over Koko B. Ware and his stuffed Frankie, which would probably be more charismatic than most of the currently active roster. RD counters this with another strange dream of his.

#008 Naming Nicknames (October 14)
The wrestling discussion carries through again on what is considered the USA Today of wrestling podcasts. Hey I didn't say that, they did. Still, if ever you want the up-to-date news on Hacksaw Jim Duggan flipping over a bus, you can't go wrong here.

#009 Gimmicks Galore (October 21)
Three trends begin here; discussion about "Obscure News", Tajiri's wife and her fear of cars, and Ricky Morton and his child support payments. Also the Co-Hosts continue their obsession over the debuting Boogeyman.

#010 Cookie Crisp Christmas Crap Radio (October 28)
Having managed to reach Halloween already, the Co-Hosts celebrate by talking about Christmas instead. But they also talk about Ricky Morton's troubles, Teddy Long's midgets, and the most important thing in the week: Jim Ross being sodomized to no one's enjoyment. This warrants an "evil" haiku for some reason.

#011 24 Hour Blade (November 11)
Surely a wrestling-based podcast would spend an important amount of time (including a week off) talking about...bad movies. Such is the case here with RD talking about watching Inspector Gadget. Still, it's better than what's being shown on Raw and Smackdown lately, including disappearing midgets.

#012 John Tenta Interview (November 18)
While we could go on about more of Ricky Morton's troubles, the passing of Eddie Guerrero, and Blade's missing pants, the Co-Hosts do break the monotonous trend by having a very charming interview with John Tenta. Hearing his bold attitude even in his situation while making the two laugh with his time on the air is a lovely thing to hear, and is definitely a high point of the show so far.

#013 Yulelog for He-Man (December 2)
Another milestone is reached, as RD celebrates the great tradition that is...Black Friday, where he saw some guy standing in line to get a free calculator. It's all uphill from there, with Blade losing it looking at Ricky Morton's website, Blade having an attraction to He-Man, more of Tajiri's wife being under house arrest, discussion about the year's Gooker nominees, and Ric Flair on the road (literally).

#014 Speaking of Rocking Chairs... (December 9)
The end of the calendar year has such hot topics as Kamala's singing about a rocking chair, a Diva being fired, and dogs barking Jingle Bells. It IS the festive season though, so it is all in (jolly) good fun, guaranteed to make you vomit on yourself in enjoyment (their words, not mine).

#015 Alien Ham (January 6)
The new year brings new things to talk about. New things such as Blade talking about the time he savagely cut a piece of ham. That's really the only interesting development here, besides more about Ricky Morton and Tajiri and Ric Flair's shenanigans, as exciting as they are to talk about.

#016 WrestleClock Radio (January 13)
The Co-Hosts discuss Divas in the 'news', bathroom nicknames, and Shelton Benjamin having less of an audience than RD and Blade. It's a rather slow week.

#017 Rated C For Crap (January 20)
To bring back the excitement missing in your average episode of WCR, the Co-Hosts discuss a porn award ceremony, an anal raping wrestler being fired, and Blade failing to get anywhere with Lita. It's not much, but they're slowly getting back up there again.

#018 Announcements (January 27)
The Co-Hosts use the aid of some MIDI trumpets to herald their Question of the Week before coasting on talking about the Spirit Squad, the Royal Rumble, and one very important picture of Jameson.

#019 Boogeyman M.D. (February 3)
The 'fascinating' wrestling news continues but it's forgiven slightly as RD has a cold and does his best to stay on form. The Co-Hosts talk about the Viking's son also wrestling, multi-vitamins, the Royal Rumble again, and Bob Orton's cast.
#020 Vince Russo Interview Part I (February 17)
Things pick up as RD and Blade announce they are working on a new book and manage to get Vince Russo into an interview with them, which is certainly very illuminating. The two discuss his time in WWF and some of the things he did there, all highly fascinating.

#021 Vince Russo Interview Part II (February 24)
The Vince Russo interview continues as the trio discuss his time in WCW and then answer a few questions. Like the earlier week both are highly entertaining as they are informative.

#022 Saturday Night's Alright For Wrestling (March 10)
After all that excitement the same old same old wrestling talk returns once again. But at least we get more 'exciting' stuff about the midget division, nostalgia about Saturday Night's Main Event, another Diva stripping in Playboy, and Verne Gagne masturbating.

#023 WrestleCrap Rumble (March 17)
With yet more references to before many listening were born, RD and Blade continue to discuss such ground breaking stuff as B. Brian Blair, the Boogeyman, Samoa Joe, Verne Gagne rapping and a concerned Jewish mother.

#024 Real Time with Real Deal (March 31)
Things suddenly take a turn for the absurd, and even with it being April Fools' Day it's not really a good sign. The two take 'calls' from, among other people, Mrs. RD, a man sounding like Vince Russo, someone pretending to be Lee Marshall, and a bill collector named John Thomas looking for a "Blade Brakestown". That is in reference to a 'joke' from last week where Blade wondered if Thomas and his ilk were cutting into his phone line to chase his bills. For its original intent at humor it's laudable...at first. That's when you wonder how on earth they would do a 'live' show for something that's normally pre-taped, not unless they can somehow find a way to bend the laws of time and space to their whim. So on that logic the whole thing falls apart. But that depends on a person thinking too hard about this show, which almost never really happens. Still, it's something different from the norm, which is a point in its favor. A small point to be sure, but a point nonetheless.

#025 Komedy with a capital K (April 7)
The 'normal' stuff returns, but at least it's slightly different with a conversation with Dr. Keith Lipinski about Wrestlemania, an Easter Egg hunt at a funeral home, and Nikolai Volkoff being advised by RD to have the Iron Sheik help him win an election. That's a surefire strategy right there.

#026 The He-Man Peep Show (April 14)
Blade manages to join RD in person at his home for once, allowing them to talk some more about having new music for going to the Grocery, Blade being aroused by He-Man, The Cat In The Hat, Randy Orton being suspended, some nonsense about a chiropractor, and most importantly, Zeus masturbating.

#027 Cornmeal Frosties (April 21)
To shake things up, RD talks about...a trip to his optometrist. It's as exciting as it sounds. To improve on things slightly two also talk about Paul Ellering having his own eye trouble (speaking of eyes) which warrants the use of some 'sad music', Pat Tanaka as a judoist, Ivan Koloff being religious, and Trish Stratus leaving WWE (though not because she's religious).

#028 WoodstockCrap Radio (IN 3-D!!!) (April 28)
With RD and Blade taking May off to work on their book, they spend the rest of their time this week talking about fruity balls, gay talk Palmer Cannon and being pounded in the ass, Verne Gagne's wad, and staying warm with your bitch in the snow. They also talk around it with God as a tag team partner and the 'return' of ECW.

#029 "New and Improved" (June 6)
Returning from their 'vacation', RD has at least taken the opportunity to improve the sound quality so he and Blade no longer sound like they're speaking from underground. They've also got a sponsor! It is Global Internet, who help run the WC site domain. Sadly that's the only things of note this week, assuming you also consider news about Mean Gene Okerlund being sued, Erik Watts' horrible booking, and the Great Khali having giant teeth to also be important.

#030 Zombie Radio (June 16)
The show suddenly takes a flying leap to some sort of weird greatness, or "jumped the Zombie" as RD puts it. With the show being off to respect the sad passing of John Tenta, the Co-Hosts commemorate his memory by talking about the 'debut' of 'ECW' including the greatness that is the Zombie. There's also talk about Randy Savage on The Surreal Life, Kamala's plastic spears, Paul Ellering exercising prostitutes, and DX's 'return', but that's not the point here. Did they have a Zombie groan in the ring? I didn't think so! Trust me, this episode must be given a listen to if only to hear how hilariously crazy it all is.

#031 Double Trouble (June 23)
The Trip to the Grocery now also has Ray Steven's The Streak as well as the music it already has, to RD's sole delight. He and Blade also talk about the food groups, important 'political' news, Lex Luger's drunken antics, Blade at a strip club, Greg Gagne booking, a ECW fallout, and a haiku that breaks Blade's composure.

#032 An angle on Angle (June 30)
To reverse their trend of talking about nothing, RD promises more 'wrestling news'. He then takes half an hour discussing Kurt Angle's move set in thrilling fashion. One would assume he's doing this on purpose to dissuade people from asking him again to do such a thing in the future...There is still time to talk about wrestlers not actually wrestling, wrestling animals, a Diva unable to take her bra off, and a first; a Weekly Wrestling Tanka!

#033 Hapines is a Warm Pun (July 7)
Things return to 'normal'; i.e. the lack of any substantial wrestling developments to discuss. RD and Blade instead talk about John Lauranitis being a secret listener to their show, fake laughter, Blade getting drunk, McMahon being out of date, Mike Knox body slamming people, and compare Divas to blow-up dolls (which is insulting to the blow-up dolls). They also bring the 'return' of the Mailbag to replace their Question of the Week, perhaps realizing that no one wants their Dusty Rhodes book.

#034 Diva Debacle (July 14)
For a change the show is rather strong this week, and with good reason. RD further 'improves' his production by now having his own laugh track; Krankor's infamous laugh from Prince Of Space. The questions they get about Siamese wrestling, the Great Khali in a dog outfit, and a lone fan of the show, are quite compelling. The Big Show's giant hands are idolized. Blade gets drunk with the help of some bizarre drinking-style music. And most importantly, the latest Diva Search sends the two into hysterics over how the Miz pronounces one contestant's name, which is certainly a laugh riot. Don't take my word for it though, listen to it for yourself!

#035 Real Angry (July 28)
As expected (and even with the week off), things are more of a downer here, with RD being angry at Lifesavers for some reason. It's really not that much of a deal to go over. The show is rather subdued here, even with RD's heckles being raised and Blade wanting to see a donkey show (or participate in one, you never can tell with him). They also talk about the victims of the Wellness Policy, more of the Diva Search, and ECW surviving on the believability of Mike Knox, Mr. Charisma.

#036 One Year Anniversary...Somehow (August 11)
Finally, after another week off, the show gets through its first year of existence, and RD and Blade can celebrate with...whatever this is supposed to be. Sure, there are some things that 'fit'. RD finds new laughs to amuse himself, he drinks a lot of milk, John Thomas calls again to pester Blade...and the wrestling news takes as little of the show as is physically possible. Instead we get Blade 'calling in' and calling himself "Bowel Movement Punk" to his own enjoyment and no one else's, some more bad impressions of Terry Funk and Dennis Stamp that spend hours to deliver a bad punchline. It's almost like April Fools once again. As I have said earlier, I hope this is just a one-off occurrence and we don't get anything as bad as this in later years. Otherwise this show would turn out into all kinds of strange awful...

The Year's "Best" Of

Number of episodes: 36

Longest episode (excluding interviews): #034 It's over an hour long!

Shortest episode (excluding interviews): #001 By contrast, the pilot is just over 20 minutes.

Best overall episode: #012 A simply touching interview with John Tenta raises the episode as a whole.
Hear also: #020 #021 The Vince Russo Interview. A very in-depth piece with a notoriously infamous figure of the WWE/WCW wars.

Funniest episode: #030 Just hearing the Zombie moan all the way throughout is enough to make anyone laugh uncontrollably.
Hear also: #002 The Co-Hosts cannot get through a haiku properly without losing themselves, among wondering who on earth is participating in the Diva Search.
#003 Another haiku gets through to the Co-Hosts. These haikus are rather weird ones, I must say.
#013 Everything overall, from Blade checking out Ricky Morton's 'site', Black Friday, and Tajiri's wife's house arrest, all make this enjoyable to listen to.
#034 The whole thing about JT Titty at the Diva Search with the other craziness in wrestling right now is simply hysterical.

Weirdest episode: #036 The whole calling-in nonsense, besides the general meandering of the day as a whole, really sticks out of the rest of the year like a sore thumb. (The earlier call-in show doesn't count because, hey, April Fools and all that.)

Funniest furious few minutes (stand-alone): Blade's strange tale about savagely slicing your ham properly. (#015)
Hear also: Discussion about the Diva Search, including whether a contestant is a woman or not. (#002)
RD seeing a man stand in line to buy a calculator on Black Friday. (#013)
Blade wanting the Great Khali to fornicate with a dog, among other things. (#034)

What The Fuck?: RD taking ten hours talking about Kurt Angle's 'move set' because people 'demanded' it.(#032)
"Hear" also: Blade reveals he has an erection for He-Man. (#013)
An odd segue involving carnivals for some reason. (#013)
"Dennis Stamp" 'calls' in to the show to make bad jokes. (#036)

We listened to THAT?: RD discussing Kurt Angle's move set (#032)
Also confusing: It's all 70's, all the time! (#001)
The timeliness of Dennis Stamp. (#002)
Mommy's milk. (#002)
How bad movie adaptations of Inspector Gadget and The Cat In The Hat tie in to wrestling. (#011)
People 'calling' in to the show. (#024)

It's the weirdest dream, Doc: Tammy Sytch's knowledge of Burt Reynolds movies. (#005)

Funniest line: "Speaking of prostitutes, a man has come." (Blade, #030)
Hear also: "Kinda like being forced to watch a rerun of Maude." (Blade, #001)
"So you got Zorak, you got Chaka, and you've got Ashley Massaro out there. Ladies and Gentlemen, the 2005 Diva Search." (Blade, #002)
"I vomited on myself in enjoyment." (RD, #014)
"I don't want to hear about you and Don busting each other with corn oil."  (RD, #017)
"You just talked about having nuts in your mouth." (RD, #025)

What The Fuck was that?: "We killed Dennis Stamp." (RD, #036)
Hear also: "I don't want to live." (Blade, #016)
"I did ejaculate at the He-Man case." (Blade, #026)

Speaking Of...: Verne Gagne masturbating (#022)
And Speaking Of...: Getting pounded in the ass. (#022)
Zeus masturbating. (#026)
Verne Gagne's wad. (#028)

WrestleSex Radio: "I did ejaculate at the He-Man case" (Blade, #026)
Feel also: "I'm glad you enjoyed your sister's Snoopy snow cones" (RD, #022)
"You just talked about having nuts in your mouth" (RD, #025)
Palmer Cannon gay talk. (#028)
"I keep groping myself, there's gonna be some moisture somewhere else." (Blade, #033)

Most startling revelation: Blade having no pants. (#012)
Hear also: Blade's Alien Ham (#015)
Blade's Front Yard Boxing Association Title (#027)

You told us THAT?: Blade failing to get anywhere with Lita at a car show. (#017)
Hear also: Blade's obsession with corn oil. Why not just deep throat the damn thing? (#017)
RD being told he has a harsh voice. You would THINK he would do some quality control on his own radio show... (#036)

That's sure to offend no-one: "I don't want him coming back and playing wheelchair basketball with Droz." (Blade, #030)
Also offensive: RD as a Jewish mother (#023)
"That was fagtacular." (RD, #030)

Most obscure reference: Vladimir Petrov discussion. It's as timely as today's headlines. (#027)
Also confusing: Maude (#001)
Chaka as a "contestant" on the Diva Search (#002)

Actual non-Crap Wrestling discussion: Remembering Saturday Night's Main Event. (#022)
Hear also: The greatness of Apter mags. (#004)
The greatness of "ECW" (#030)

Saddest News: The passing of John Tenta. May he RIP. (#030)
Hear also: The passing of Eddie Guerrero (#012)
Paul Ellering's Cornmeal Frosties (#027)

Favorite on-going news trend: Ricky Morton's jailhouse blues (#009)
See also: Tajiri's wife's motorphobia (#009)

Favorite wrestler to discuss: The Boogeyman. Just don't talk about clocks with him. (#001)
Discuss also: Hulk Hogan, particularly his lactation abilities. (#002)

Least favorite wrestler to discuss: Christy Hemme and her hungry butt. (#017)
Do not discuss also: "B.M. Punk" but that's a bit of a stretch because he's not an actual wrestler. Still, if ever we see such a man on the indie circuit... (#036)

Funniest character: John Thomas and his debt payment crusade against Blade Brakestown. (#024)

Who the fuck is this?: Terry Funk/Dennis Stamp together because they're essentially one and the same. Also because they were terrible to hear. B.M. Punk would also have fit in here, but he's not a bad 'wrestler' impersonation like the earlier two. Also he's easier to hear. (#036)

Favorite sound bite: The Zombie's in town! (#030)
Hear also: Krankor's automobile laugh. (#034)

Best music pad: Blade's drinking music. (#034)
Hear also: Blade's Haiku mood music. (#002)
The show intro (Extreme's Play With Me)

Most out-of-tune music: Blade's "Evil" Haiku music. It sure drowned out whatever he was trying to say. (#010)
Do not hear also: The "new and improved" Ratt theme. (#029)

A+ Haiku: #034
Moronic Divas.
How will this class top last year's?
Leave it to Deever.

F- Haiku: #010
JR's battered ass.
That was so painful. My poor
eyes felt sodomized.

Overall "Season" Score


Despite the show's few mistakes (understandable of course), the whole thing's been rather enjoyable so far. One wonders how they'll continue with the show going on to the next year/season...


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