010 Cookie Crisp Christmas Crap Radio: October 28, 2005

"This may not be the show for you."
((( recorded in medium phone-buzzing fidelity ))) (32 minutes)

Blade is willing to shave his beard off if it would garner more listeners.

Bumper Stumpers sucked. RD's Weekly Trip to the Grocery: he and Blade hate Cookie Crisp. The new King Vitamin character is even more creepy. Blade doesn't hand out Halloween candy, preferring to horde it all himself. RD liked C. Thomas Howell's Soul Man.

Obscure Wrestling News now has an intro sound effect and Blade hates it. April Hunter was upset about something about Tammy Sytch being upset about something. Ricky Morton owes almost $75,000 in child support payments. Perhaps YOU can help pay it off at helprickymorton.org .Robert Gibson could sell his glass eye and shoulder battery to help Ricky Morton who's still in jail. I guess. [These early shows are very short on actual jokes.]

[This is also the first mention of the Uncharismatic Enigma that will come to be known to WrestleCrappers around the world as Don...Don Mason. - Future PB]

I'M GONNA KILL THE
FUCK OUT OF THIS SNOW GLOBE!!
Question of the Week from Outback Jack: Bobby Lashley resembles Ahmed Johnson. Apparently, in the past, wrestlers, such as Ahmed Johnson, have asked Vince McMahon for more money based on their ranking on PWI's made-up top 500 wrestlers list. I don't know if anyone would have understood him with his mushy-mouthed voice though.

This week in late October, Spike TV premiered Santa's Slay, a movie in which Goldberg plays a murderous Santa. Blade saw it. The only thing he really remembers about it was that Chris Kattan starred in it.

RD doesn't know if Teddy Long treats midgets more like unruly children or like dogs. Jim Ross' alleged ass had many things stuck in it, and they're available at the WWE ShopZone.

Evil Halloween Haiku:
JR's battered ass.
That was so painful. My poor
eyes felt sodomized.

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