303 Old Blood: March 21, 2021

 87 minutes

The ultimate of ironies...just like this show.


RD is happy for once because they're only eight minutes late today. Blade is happy for once because he has a script instead of an itinerary today.

Blade was listening to other radio progrems these days. One of them involved Conrad Thompson having to fill in for "the Best of" an occupied Bruce Pritchard.
Blade: "You should do a Best of Me episode and worship me."
RD: "It would be like two minutes long."

Coasty Marshmellow is a year old and still doing extremely well. I still need to figure out what my custom order will be about. (:14) 

Hard-up Blade wants to knock-up someone to have an illegitimate child. He was once cursed at by Konnan at a WCW house show after he shoved him for some reason. Blade shoving him, I mean. RD subtly shades him by not bleeping him when he swears against himself. 

Blade was on the road recently where he got a Food Lion generic Mountain Dew, which is of course named Mountain Lion (and is not to be confused with Dollar General's just Mountain). (:18) The Fruitcakes actually agree on something for once: they prefer straight soda over gimmicks.

Then two old men remember 80s cartoons, like what old man led WWE is doing by releasing new He-Man style action figures. (:28) I like how they made upcoming Warrior He-Man more cartoonish than his Santa-assaulting comic book form.

Sad News: RD cannot find many original He-Man voice actors on Cameo. One was unknowingly sick.

Sadder News: 2 year old Blade had to pretend he was a year older in order to buy his first Threepio figure.

RD is to next get vaccinated on April 1st, of all days. (:44)

SPEAKING OF Conrad, he was Twitter feuding with the Patriot, if by "feuding" you mean ruthlessly and mercilessly humiliating. (Why, you'd think he was a jobber or something!) Blade does his Jim Ross impression. 

SPEAKING OF Jim, he couldn't complete a recent blood donation. Of course they call him up to make fun of him for this. (:48) RD thinks he didn't sound so good on the last Dynamite, and then summons Popeye to further mess things. "Shove your ass!" Jim mumbles. 

SPEAKING OF...you know, Tam Only has 4 Fans to a now inactive profile. (:57) You'd think with all the money she'd made she could have hired someone to help caretake her affairs. I hear the Patriot has a lot of free time on his hands for such a thing. 

Rob McGrath of Facebook Questions about a Dungeon of Doom revival. I think Bray Wyatt is overdue to lead that. (:61)

Blade apologizes for his own Court idea. (:64) "Phillip Dick" brings up the Repo Man, because he was cut too soon. For once RD actually praises Blade for bringing up good points...before he makes fun of the original question for saying he could have done Make-A-Wish appearances. Verdict: Guilty.

Stemming from the excellent women's match over on AEW, RD makes Blade list his favorite women's matches. (:68) He has Wendi Richter vs Leilani Kai at Wrestlemania I, Mickie James vs Trish Stratus at Wrestlemania not I, and some 80's "foxy oil wrestling" scored by Motley Crue. 

RD's new favorite is the aforementioned Dynamite one of Thunder Rosa vs Dr. Britt Baker DMD with Rebel not Reba, even if he doesn't want to see it again because it was so bloody, and even without any Ken Patera swinging full nelsons. He wants Blade to ask him about his favorite cereal the next time he sees him. (:76)

The disappearing WWE Network is taking the bulk of its old archives with it into the void, at least in the US. RD wonders if he should get a VPN to watch it internationally, where it still exists (for now).

RD's and WWE's Frenemy Eric Bischoff is entering their Hall of Fame. Seventeen Syllables:
Bischoff inducted.
What's one good thing we can say?
He should dye his hair.


$0.50: $34.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right 


Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. Patreon, wrestlecrapradio.com, Coasty Marshmellow
  • URLs not taken: 0.
  • SPEAKING OFs: 5. Mountain Dew, wrestling, Dungeons and Dragons, Conrad Thompson, things that don’t make sense
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • I didn’t even know he was sick:  1. Lou Scheimer, voice of Orko 
 
  • Phone Calls & Run Ins: 2. Jim, Popeye

 

  • F-Bombs: 1. Blade
 
  • Blade Time Outs:  1
  • Mama's Broken Damn Damn Damn Dishes:  3
  • Cricket Chirps:  1
  • Krankor Laughs:  2
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  3
  • Weird Al Laughs:
  • WrestleCrap Gongs: 8
 
  • Question of the Week from: Rob McGrath
    • The Giant recently returned to TNT after over 20 years being away.  Surely the iron is hot for a Dungeon of Doom Version 2, who would you include in this group? The Dinosaur, Bear Country.
 
  • Crapper's Court
    • Case brought by: Phillip Dick
    • Case #003: Crappers v. Barry “Repo Man” Darsow. 
    • Blade's "defense": Darsow made the gimmick work.  He took every gimmick thrown at him.
    • Verdict: Still guilty of WrestleCrap. 
 
  • WrestleCrap 3 Count:  3 Favorite Women’s Wrestling Matches.
    • RD:  Thunderosa vs Dr. Britt Baker DMD in AEW, No sold (non-sequentially)
    • Blade:  Keisha vs Lady Desire oil wrestling, Mickie James vs Trish Stratus at Wrestlemania, Wendi Richter vs Leilani Kai at Wrestlemania I
 
  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Eazy-E is headed to the hall and the hairdresser:
    Bischoff inducted.
    What's one good thing we can say?
    He should dye his hair.

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