169 MenstrualCrap Radio: March 12, 2010

75 minutes

As teased at the beginning of the year, a new Monday Night War has developed between RAW and Impact going head to head. But it can't do anything to cure Blade's menstrual fetish. He's also interested in the ages of wrestlers for some reason, like some pseudo Art Donovan. One of those wrestlers is Hungry Hungry Ken Patera.

RD's TRIP (:14) is sponsored by Popeye and Blade's bad jokes.

:20 Stacy Keibler was at Elton John's Post-Oscar party (sponsored by Popeye.) RD is mystified by those gatherings oddly enough. The Iron Sheik was arrested on a flight for being his usual drunk self. Blade wants to be Popeye for some reason.

WORLD CHAMPION IRON SHEIK. FUCK THE HULK HOGAN!!

Tylene Buck is currently doing some sort of webcam thing. Selling point: no pubic hair. The Co-Fs look around Maryse's website randomly and listen to random music on Leila Milani's site. But what about her pubes, are THEY shaved? [I like to think she's had them fashioned into a replica of the Wrestlicious logo - "Showstealer"] Blade makes his only actual joke of the episode when he wants to see Ted DiBiase's Million Dollar Mare/Mane, complete with soundbite.

The HorseTrolla tells us Mickie James has been sidelined from wrestling due to a staph infection from some leg surgery, which is an excuse for Blade to indulge his foot fetish (shouldn't that be a hoof fetish in this case?) The BabyTrolla tells us that Stephanie McMahon is pregnant again.

Screamin' Cheech has one of the wittiest Questions I've heard recently about musical groups. (:51)

Speaking of the Monday Night War of earlier...well, WWE completely dominated TNA this week so Blade has to be that Ratings Reaper guy again. His TNA Peter Gazer guy is still a no show so RD has to do his Dixie Carter to kill time even MORE than they normally do.

:60 Jim Ross may return to WWE in time for Wrestlemania, so the Co-Fs call him up. Now he's angry about people constantly emailing about Joanie Laurer when they SHOULD be instead looking for the elusive Dark Journey.

Seventeen syllables about Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan on TNA:
New Monday Night War.
Same old Nature Boy Ric Flair.
Bloody Mount Rushmore.

Minisode #168 Salute to Women

by iggy



March 5, 2010

Wrestlelicious
Apartment Wrestling
Stadium Events and Nintendo John
Sir Alec reads Gorgeous George.
Dixie Carter calls

#happy fury #apter

I wonder if the Great Khali still hates John Cena...

...seeing as how he reminds him of Adam Sandler of The Longest Yard [Probably. Anything that reminds me of Adam Sandler in that movie is enough to send me into a homicidal rage - "Showstealer"], but that's not important right now. What IS though is that I'm pleased to have with us as a new Co-Historian the irreplacable Erik Majorwitz, the original documentarian of the WW Haiku and all around good guy. Please be sure to make him feel very welcome!
- PB

Random Thoughts From The Office: Salute This, March 5, 2010

My name is Clarence "Showstealer" Mason and I am not Wrestlicious.

Mind you if I won the lottery the idea of owning my own women's wrestling promotion does appeal, as Blah quoted from me when the idea of Wrestlicious first came to be there are worse ways to get a date and I guess that is a fantasy for every 19 year old male. But I am not a fan of Wrestlicious, just as I wasn't a fan of WOW, just as I wasn't a fan of GLOW and I'm not for one reason. I think it cheapens women's wrestling and makes it a poor sideshow attraction (Kind of like Nintendo John but somehow more annoying)

It frustrates the hell out of me, womens' wrestling can work at least on an independent level, federations like SHIMMER have shown us that and the wrestling seen is usually better than a lot you see from guys on Raw, Smackdown or Impact. With stars like Cheerleader Melissa, Allison Danger, Sara Del Ray and Amazing Kong they have proven to be a great underground hit, add this to the fact they showcase new talent like a Jessie McKay or a Madison Eagles (*sigh* My Angel) and they put forth good matches up and down the card.

Why is that so hard nowadays? To book a compelling two and a half hour show for a major event shouldn't be that hard, let alone a 24 minute show like Wrestlicious. Yet it always seems that when women's wrestling is in the spotlight on a national stage it's either filled with stupid characters and bad comedy (Seriously I love Lizzy Valentine but Kandi Kisses I'm looking in your direction, let me give you some career advice. If you're really aiming to be a pop superstar, ripping off 3 Count isn't the way to go. I never saw their video and suddenly wanted to be Evan Karagias) or it's filled with pretty faces who put on basic matches and are terrible at doing that (Maryse I'm now looking your direction, or more truthfully I'm trying not cause quite frankly you scare me. You look like Medusa (The Mythical One not the Monster Truck Diving, throwing belts in trash cans women's wrestler)). And with the recent releases of Kong and Melissa it doesn't look like TNA is going to be any better.

One of the best matches I saw last year was Sara Del Ray vs Madison Eagles from SHIMMER, women's wrestling can work and yet it seems unless you're a pretty face or are willing to humiliate yourself you'll never get ahead in the business. That's all the sadder for knowing it.

Another quick thought in the Salute to Women of my Random Thoughts and my favorite TV Woman at the moment, not in terms of looks although she is quite good to look at or even wrestling ability just in general. Chelsea, Desmond Wolfe's valet, what happened to the good old days of the valet? I remember with fond memories the days of Babydoll, Sensational Sherri, Precious and of course Miss Elizabeth and I think these days are a good way to go again for the big two. Let's be honest, women's wrestling on a national basis is a joke and will never be fixed, it frustrates me but it's also the way it is. So why not take these girls who aren't doing anything, like for example a Taylor Wilde and let them get over that way, even up till a few years ago with Stacy Keibler the idea of a valet worked and with a girl like Taylor, you know she can get involved and give you the goods, something that made Sherri a cut above in her days, espcially in the AWA. By doing that you accomplish two things, you still get the gorgeous women on TV and give the guys something to look at and you also improve the women's wrestling product by leaving it just for the wrestlers. In other words you can have your cake and eat it too.......unless you're Michelle McCool in which case you won't eat anything.

There is virtually no downside and a hell of a lot of upside if you just give it a go and maybe then once again the women of wrestling will be able to be saluted again.

Or Wrestlicious could become the next big hit.....God knows the wrestling gods do seem to like a joke that way.

Clarence "Showstealer" Mason

168 WrestliciousCrap Radio: March 5, 2010

74 minutes

A middle-finger salute from the looks of it.

Being inspired by the first episode of Wrestlicious, the greatest wrestling show since WSX, RD makes some sort WrestleCrap's Salute to Women, which sounds more like a badly sexist short from the 50's. Speaking of sexism, Blade explains apartment wrestling to us. Sadly it does not involve Paul Christy in any way, shape or form.

Speaking of that Wrestlicious pilot the two decide to watch the whole thing on air. (:14) And if you have the same knowledge of the podcast as I do, you also know fully well how well their commentaries run on the show. It's not helped by RD's forced laughter at the whole show. Drunk with power from doing the progrem for too long, just having fun with the whole thing...or it's just hiding secret self loathing of it all? YOU make the call.

You can watch some sort of synchronized segments of that episode here, or you could instead read what Clarence "Showstealer" Mason thinks about it in the posting up above. For now though, here's a 'teaser'.

2 Minutes in: My god this sucks.

5 Minutes in: Why are they rapping?

8 Minutes in: My god this show sucks

11 Minutes: MY GOD THIS SHOW SUCKS!

15 Minutes in: I have lost the will to live.

18 Minutes: I give up. This is not Wrestlicious.

Anyway.

Blade's auction of that rare NES game was sold for around $9400. (:37) Nintendo John and his audience calls in to congratulate him.

:44 Sir Alec reads a single line from Tammy Sytch's Facebook page before bidding us "Ciao." Somehow I don't think he's actually a classically trained British actor. Blade generally deconstructs the whole progrem for us. The HorseTrolla alerts us to Mickie James' new single.

Question from an Eric: (:58) Some badly punctuated non-question about Bret Hart. That couldn't have been the only letter they got all week, could it? Blade has found his new TNA guy (:62) but he's yet another no-show, so Dixie Carter is forced to call in instead.

:69 Some people got future endeavored, including Paul Burchill, another victim of the Curse, and Maria, which would obviously sadden the Midnight Rose. Hornswaggle is hawking random cereals but I have no idea which ones because I wasn't paying attention at that point.

The two then rap randomly for some reason.

PB is my name, to win is my game,
And to beat all challengers against my name.
You must pardon me if I seem quite vicious,
I do what it takes to be Wrestlelicious.