103 Beat Meatings: May 9, 2008

Irritable RD
"without hyperbole, worst show ever" (:73)
(80 minutes)

If rumors are to be believed, Ashley Massaro has been busted as being part of an escort service. Blade is reminded of his prostitute roommate who once lactated on someone for money. This causes him to hit the bottle (not of milk).

New Myspace page: WrestleCrap Songs (:16), just as the rest of the world has grown tired of Myspace. Someone has put their Good Times singing from last week to music.

Someone at RD's line of work won a bottle of Crown Royal, while another won a Colts Cornhole game. Blade meanwhile won a smoker. Combined together they may make a "Cornhole smoker" (:22).

Blade says there's no information on the internet about CW Post cereal (:25). Internet sources have told this reporter that it's Great Grains: Raisins Dates & Pecans. By the way, one cup of it provides 420 calories and 28 grams of sugar. [Irritable Blade writes: That cereal is not CW Post. As a kid, I hated pecans and dates, and I still do. There wasn't any of that shit in CW Post. In fact, I've tried most of the cereals morons on the internet have said "taste just like CW Post," and they're all wrong. That cereal sadly does not exist in any form today.] RD had a granola problem with his Fiber Ones (:30).

Faxtrolla: Obscure Wrestling News is obscure (:31 - :59). Blade made a poem for Don Mason about masturbating. Victoria will soon open her Automobile store in Louisville and will host a party. RD and Blade want to go and beat their meat with sticks there in the presence of Hooters Girls and Obama. I hope she approves of their activities. Rob Conway has PayPal. It's all his fault for some reason. (:42) Fabien Kaelin is advertising for Ab Rocket. (:46) The Great Khali is going to be honored by the Indian government. Sadly Topeka, Kansas does not want to honor Blade in any way, shape, or form. A "Greg Valentine" was defeated in an Indiana district election. (:57) Blade wants Kitty Dukakis to be raped. Can YOU smell what Barack is cooking?

GILLMAN
Question of the Week from Austin Gilliam, the Creature from the Black Lagoon (2): RD gets irritated because, four minutes after the music was played, he still hasn't gotten to the question (:63). However he has no one to blame but himself, for enabling Blade's practices and not having enough patience for such. And also not apparently knowing about a 'mute' button. (But less for Blade than for his own silent laughter.) Blade doesn't have an answer for his first drunken experience (the Gillman's question, in case you had forgotten).

Johnny 6's on-air demise is discussed (:66). Chris Engler of Trolla sent a letter revealing that the robot was in fact made from Pinto parts. He has has a dream for Dream Analysis, where he was in a speedboat with Hulk Hogan. (:71). Blade is again useless.

Trevor Murdock is still serenading Trish Stratus (:74)

Blade sings about Ashley in lieu of a haiku.

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