130 You're a mean one, Mr. Deal. December 19, 2008

WrestleCrap Radio Recap
You're a mean one, Mr. Deal.
82 minutes
Written by Premier Blah

Disclaimer: If you're looking for any actual wrestling news in this episode, then I'm afraid you're out of luck. You'd probably have to ask my colleague Farmer for any sort of detail on that. [Just go to Rajah.com --Iggy] Take any other Christmas episode and pretend it's this year's if you want.

RD and Blade announce that due to the hard financial times we are in, only one of the...'12' listeners could send them a present, of which we'll soon see. (:03) Don Mason once tried having sex with a dwarf. Unfortunately she did not have the name of Sexy. (:05) Blade once again promises a great show, but he's not helped by being drunk off his ass due to the Lions' loss to the Colts. According to Mr. Braxton he's more better when sober, but I have my doubts. Besides he could have two deadly sides, like Harvey Dent. He also has some array of STDs. RD is mystified by things on his own DVD. (:13)

Mention is made of last week of Angry JR (still being angry in a post-credits section), trying to uplift his spirits by making a "christmas album" (16). We listen to Blade's karaoke - I mean Angry JR - spitting on the mike about Bell's Palsy as RD helps record his golden tones (and tries to stifle his laughter - yes, very professional.)

There is mention of the new induction, the movie adaptation of How The Grinch Stole Christmas. I admit it's a terrible movie, and one of Ron Howard's worst, but I disagree with RD by saying I've seen worse. Besides, in my humble opinion the worst Dr. Suess movie is obviously The Cat in the Hat. RD reveals he's drinking a bit too due to the movie. (:21) Sadly Blade did NOT see it with Don Mason . RD's TRIP consists of his ordeal of an odyssey of obtaining the movie to review, interspersed by Blade's meanderings (of course). Also according to RD Nate will 'not' be appearing - perhaps RD is too filled with rage to do a nerd impersonation. Hmmm, I wonder how long that will last. Another JR 'song' is made, I mean listened to. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Obscure Wrestling News - Maria is dating a WWE cameraman (:32). Sad News - Deuce is splitting from Domino and Cherry is retiring to pursue education - a very honorable venture to be sure. (33) Another JR 'song'. mypenisdoesnothavepalsy.com has not yet been taken. Does that mean it would get erect on one side only?

Question of the Week (:38) this week Present of the Week, due to gifts from Crapper Ed Solo (they say his name wrong, what is it about mispronouncing surnames? Don't get to MY name I beg you!). They turn out to be some very nice Count Chocula shirts. Also, is RD actually getting any questions from us 12 listeners?

The 'Trolla gift' hasn't 'arrived' for RD, prompting him to call Technical Support...for a package delivery? Not to break kayfabe here, but don't you need CUSTOMER Support for that? Jesus H. Christ. (or should that be Bah Humbug!) He does this via a free face-to-face Skype call. (:43) The whole thing is just an excuse for the TattooTrolla Guy to make an happy appearance answering RD's call. It seems the package was sent not to RD, but to Nathaniel. Of course, seeing as how RD and Nate are the same guy...it's easy to get confused.

Sure enough, here's 'Nate' to explain himself (:49) He calls into 'WrestleClap' (Is that one of Blade's mentioned STDs?) Also tnafanforum.com has not yet been taken, despite Nate's insistence. Coincidentally the package arrives for him just that moment. How 'convenient.' (Also RD hits on his wife - I mean, Nate's 'mother'.) It turns out to be a TrollaTron 7800 MegaTrolla, the new TNA correspondent. "But wait," you say (assuming you verbally respond to this website), "Isn't that Nate's job? How are we going to explain this discrepancy?" Sure enough, Nate gets exterminated for our amusement, sounding like an extra in one of Don Mason's home movies [And buy your copy of the Archive Disc today! /shill]. (Also the sounds of gunfire sound more like he's getting killed questing for a Captain Crunch drink at the nearby Carl's Jr.) Now, I'm all for Nate's replacement, but if he was REALLY to die we would have it easily written off with no-one missing him. GET IT? *Crickets* Also this is the fifth TNA guy in one year alone. For the next year I predict it will change at least four more times, one of those times being Angry JR. Want to hold me on it Iggy? The wager doesn't have to be on hockey of course. [I'll bite. What's at stake? --Iggy] [Hmmm...whoever loses has to be more nice than mean-spirited in their next recap of the show?][Okay, but let's put it on the Pens/Habs game rather than waiting until 2010. --Iggy]

Current Wrestling News - Marissa Tomei plays a naked stripper in The Wrestler (:60) Boy, THAT'S a stretch. A recap of the show and all the wrestling news therein is made, which...yeah. We get another JR 'song'.

Finally we get to the main point of the week, and presents are opened. (:65) Blade got back his shirt he left at RD's home, some Boba Fett helmet car thing, a Darth Vader snow globe, some Lions shirt, and some action figures of the Dynamite Kid and Davey Boy Smith and Matilda (in packaging for Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson). RD got a DVD of The Outsiders, a Quentin Tarantino figure who looks like Peyton Manning (in Kill Bill: Vol.3: Kill Bill Belichick), and a Don Mason gift of Killer Looks complete with corn oil.

Haiku to close out the wonderful year of 2008:
Nathaniel is dead.
Blasted by Trolla product.
Greatest gift of all.

Oh, and one more JR 'song' for the road. Happy holidays everyone! Iggy and myself wish you all well till the next year.

129 DetroitLionsCrap.com - I bet that's not taken! December 12, 2008

WrestleCrap Radio Recap
DetroitLionsCrap.com - I bet that's not taken!
72 minutes
Written by Premier Blah

The antics of the Great Khali and his long tongue kissing Mickie James (and her tail) forces Blade to drink. Blade has a feeling that this episode will be 'the greatest show of all time'. Also, the Titanic is unsinkable. (:03) The Colts and Lions are playing next week - another bet is proposed, perhaps of Blade having sex with Nicole Bass. (In this writer's opinion it would be more bearable if one or both were wearing Katie Vick outfits. mountingnicolebass.com is not yet taken. Lions Center Dominic Raiola has no remorse for flipping off his heckling fans at a home game (:07) - well, what do you expect from a wrestling broadcast but pro football news? Blade wants him to scratch his taint. (scratchingyourtaint.com has not yet been taken.) Discussion follows of the hapless Lions and Raiola wanting to challenge his hecklers in his front lawn - could that be a basis for a good video game? Blade mentions his Front Yard Boxing Association Championship Belt. (:11) A real bet is made for the game - the loser has to be drunk for next show. I don't know - at this point I'm more interested in making a bet with Farmer Iggy here on who would emerge victorious when the Canadiens face the Penguins. [How about: if the Penguins lose, Blade has to defend his FYBA title against Paul Bissonnette? —Iggy] Also Blade has two interviews this week on doorstopnation.com and myspace.com/theatomicdropshow

RD's TRIP to the grocery (:16) is made possible in thanks to the Archive (and viewers like you). It seems that one of the purchasers, one John P., bought RD some Bimbo Bread. Now don't laugh - the thing is actually real, albeit a more Mexican food than American one.

Obscure Wrestling News - RD & Blade were invited to a Trish Stratus party up north. (:20). Finger food is mentioned. RD becomes sad that the party is not exclusive to them. >.< O.D.B. of TNA is 'sailing' some used undergarments for $50+ 'due to popular demand' (perhaps she was jealous of Layla's oranges). (:25) Also the mere mention of TNA has a Candyman like effect of 'Nathaniel' trying to ring in. [Also for some reason I start thinking of back home. Can you blame me?] RD had a cool menthol turkey to go with Blade's alien ham. Barry Darsow's son is signed to a WWE D-League (:31) Blade wonders if he will become Repo Boy. Sad News - Robecca DiPietro removes the ad commentary video (:32) maybe because she actually watched it (or perhaps read my writing on the thing and brought two and two together). The co-hosts fear she will never appear on the show - thank God for that!

Angry Swearing JR calls in (:35) - he lost out on his Slammies and his holiday hams aren't going too well and he hasn't been going well with his wife either. Also he still doesn't like Brother Midnight. Phone rings - speak of the devil, here he is! (:40). A hilarious debate between the two ensues, of which we learn that Jim only lives for his BBQ sauce. BM's Crusade's help actually make our slobberknocker man into Happy JR. It's a Christmas miracle! (I give him until the end of the episode.)

Question of the Week (:50) from a 'Jay' wants Verne Gagne to beat up John Cena. Blade wants Rambo Greg Gagne to return as a log-throwing heel. RD wants Dr. D to be his companion. A possible name of a possible DVD of Dr. D: "Eat it, eat it now!"

RD as Nate comes to spoil our fun, the Scrooge that he is. (:55) Also some small disfluency pops up in his speech, and not just because he sounds more and more like RD sounding as a man who loves TNA TOTAL NONSTOP ACTION WRESTLING. This week; Sarah Palin on TNA? Gee, I wonder how that idea came about. 2 minutes this time. RD can't 'harm' Nate (seeing as he harms himself too, but of course we don't hear that).

More Sad News/Current Wrestling News: (Blade comments on the show's highs and lows, reminding me of an earlier similar show.) Gene Snitsky AKA Boba Foot has been released (:59) A possible name for a possible DVD: Punting Babies And Foot Fetishes. Could TNA be next? Hulk and Flair showed up in the Carolinas somewhere on YouTube and attracted 800 people (:62) - but hey, that's more than an average TNA house showing. rickysteamboatjronaboat.com has not yet been taken, complete with Ricky Steamboat's Family Man song too no doubt. Blade does some bad impressions. WWE was overseas in Iraq (:66) where Joey Styles beat up JBL.

Seventeen Syllables to commemorate Joey Styles legitimate threat to Blade's FYBA Championship:
JBL knocked out.
Guess mamajuana does-
-n't help a glass jaw.

And of course, a newly Angry JR calls in at the end of the show. Did I call it or what?

128 The Big Black Friday Recap Show: December 5, 2008

The Big Black Friday Recap Show
95 minutes
Written by Premier Blah

This writ is dedicated to Buddy "Dinobot" Beene, who passed away just previously. Rest in peace, this one is for you.

This week's inductee, one Dr David Schultz, thinks the site is the City Dump. RD believes that if he stayed with the company he could have been a license to print money/ratings (:02) Discussion of this mortal enemy of John Stossel follows, Blade saying that any news of him overtook Black Friday. The Detroit Lions were annihilated by the League darlings the Tennessee Titans on Thanksgiving 10-47 making Blade sad. Unfortunately he doesn't go hitting the bottle which would make things infinitely better. (:05) RD calls the game one of the single worst games he has ever seen in his entire life. The two were texting back and forth during that match, like some sort of middle-aged tall BFFs. Blade got a Lions 2008 pre-season championship shirt in the mail from some site or other. His 'match' with Nicole Bass is brought up. The season is not looking good for RD's Colts, Blade's Lions or my beloved Packers. Lions0in16.com has not yet been taken. RD's Christmas present is whatisthisthecitydump.com complete with looping sound bite. (isn't that at ytmnd.com somewhere?) (Also, if you want more Dr D insanity check out the beginning of this YouTube video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q43B__43brk ) The two Masonmania entries are mentioned. Blade shills himself in the new DVD (:13) and is said to be 'disgusting' in the shoot interview by RD.

RD's TRIP to Black Friday (:16) makes RD fearful of his life from the hillbillies around him. JED!!! RD's jokes fail at Wal-Mart, much like they do normally on the show. He also meets a Grizzly Adams/Mike Knox type with a knife. He quotes an angry shopper - "I fuckin' hate Christmas!" Blade is thankful he slept in for it.

Obscure FaxTrolla: Bri Bella of the Bella Twins (I know them from MySpace too! What a small world indeed) is dating Richie Kotzen, formally of Poison (34), and maybe even the other twin too if I'm thinking right. Thank God Bret is not involved. It's also Tammy Sytch's birthday, she is 36 and between Blade and RD's age (:36). Her site is visited. There's also a NSFW Google Image Search involving 'Tammy Sytch eggs' - sunny side up of course (I've seen some terrible stuff and even I have to admit that makes me nauseous). Thankfully tammysytcheggyolks.com is not yet taken. And finally there's her Amazon Wish List for her birthday, but the only thing bought is this rather strange item. Quick, all 12 Listeners buy her something! Maybe we can even buy something for Val Venis too while we're at it.

Hmmm, a $10 admission bargain at half the price of Greg Valentine and George Steele starring in a movie together? (:45) We watch the teaser snippet for their movie, Somethin' Fishy, which involves the two co-stars just sitting around talking. Kinda like this show really. RD is surprised by George's talking while Blade wants to hear Greg talk about having sex with non-Chyna trannies. Sadly neither of the two took a dive in the drink, so thus the whole thing is an ordeal. Now, a fishing movie with Dr D? THAT would be a blockbuster according to RD. There are free showings on this Friday December 5th down in Florida, has anyone gone down there yet? Feel free to contact anyone over at WC or on this fine site if you have.

The HorseTrolla lifts the tail, with more news on Mickie James (:54), who wants to act. Also she has split up with John Cena, which is good news for Blade. Hit the porn music!

Jim Ross calls (:58), this time he's now Serious JR. After telling us about how Doctor Steve Williams poisoned a child with a badly cooked turkey, he feels Brother Midnight is trying to fuck with him with a BBQ apron and also providing the thought of BBQing naked. He promises to help ham cooking tips for Christmas, while suffering what seems to be an emotional breakdown.

Question of the Week. (:67) Raging Demons talks about TNA and a Cricket Arena. Those two go well together! And SPEAKING OF TNA...'Nathaniel' is here. (:70) He sounds more and more like RD with each successive episode. There's something about turkeys - not this segment in general I might ask? Blade is mad as hell and is not gonna take this anymore, but the Star Gazer/Hustler music interrupts - Seaman First Class Peter Gazer has come to save the day! (:73) He's on the line and out of the closet, and RD & Blade are happy to see him, as are we all. (His entrance to the Navy has been tied up which explains his appearance, which is about as valid as me being tied up while trying to be the next Captain of the Habitant. Also, Go Habs Go. That is all.) He calls 'Nerdaniel' a Totally Nerd Asshole...so he's indirectly calling out RD too? (As you can see my suspension of disbelief has broken, sending my disbelief all over the street crushing helpless civilians.) He scares off Nate away though, God be praised, and wonders if Blade is bi, promising to teach Nate something should he visit. Now THAT would be a welcome site. But his gay attitude brings back the gayness in the holiday spirit. Oh, and ihurtnerdaniel.com has not yet been taken. (Or is it iheartnerdaniel.com ?)

Music-less Current/Sad News (:80) Bruce Pritchard/Brother Love has been released. The Gobbeldy Gooker was sighted at Survivor Series with the Boogeyman. (:83) Robecca DiPietro favored the WCR commentary video of her Batista sex doll commercial. SPEAKING OF Batista, he was involved with Kelly Kelly at one point but split off from her due to her being too immature. You don't say? (:85) (Oh, and here's a pic of the man himself at a Washington Wizards game) Discussion of his 'mentor' Ric Flair and his sexual conquests follows. Stephanie McMahon should be called Black Monday. Mockery of her and the Slammies follows. Also Shawn Michaels is broke.

Seventeen Syllables of Knowledge:
Broke-ass HBK.
No cash - guess it's time for Whis-
Per to start whoring.

Oh, and I counted Blade saying "you know" at least 30 times. What did YOU get?