271 Marcho Madness: March 26, 2018

Uh Oh!

91 minutes

RD and Blade do not like basketball much. This definitely has nothing to do with their hometown teams sucking. (Or in RD's case following multiple bad teams at once.) Blade brought it up however as an excuse to portray "Marcho Madness" if he were an old western prospector (and possibly owning a mine called The Danger Zone. Motto: "Can you (be able to) dig it?"). RD remembers when Mark Jindrak was an evil basketball player in WCW, though he's missing recordings of it. At least they also have Shaq's surprise WrestleMania appearance, Dennis Rodman in the nWo, and Stan "Kronkie" pissing off old man Vince.

This month it's Patrick Stewart's turn to promotional considerate with the all new Pontiac Montana Del Fantasma with "all new air filters!" (:06)

RD's latest writing, this week of hat wearing ECW Champion Vince McMahon was an excuse for him to post an image of Kristal Marshall. (:10) Blade randomly remembered when she doused herself in blue paint during the Diva Search, then blames others for driving him to drink.

RD took a TRIP to Jungle Jim's (International Market), causing Blade to interrupt him with laughter. (:13) There he bought a (glass) bottle of root beer from Chowning's Tavern, which when taste tested is pungent and tastes like unwanted root beer bubblegum.

Sad News: One time while touring Blade found Bart's Root Beer with no caffeine in it. Sadder News: According to RD's investigative Googling he learns he actually took a sugar free (and caffeine free) one instead. (:20)

Obscure Nestlé News: RD found the connection between the corporation name and their nest logo. Wait till he finds out about Nescafé and Nespresso! (:23) Blade has some "serious business" to complete and wants to auction off some deep frozen Universal Studios crunch bars he found in his folks' fridge 20 years ago.

65 year old Ricky Steamboat whom Blade respected as a child defeated "The Duke" (:27) The two wonder which Duke it was. My money is on Edmund.

Aspiring necromancer Eric Sims wants to bring Doink back, initially confusing RD. Blade has to clarify, further confusing RD. (:31)

Tammy's back in the slammy again. (That sounded better in my head.) (:34) Things have gotten so bad the duo initially think she was jailed for an earlier offense.

Despite putting them in the itinerary and having their MIDI music played, Blade's friend Cory Udler is unable to make the time as Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley to report on TNA news, of which I can't blame him. (:38) Thus RD instead calls up a Patreon patron by the name of Sean Stein to do so instead. One of the rewards of being a $50 tier WC sponsor is "a one-time guest shot on WrestleCrap Radio", so he appears on what Blade randomly calls "The Stein Line" (Blade reveals he's still stuck on "TV Guide time" where each day starts at 5 am).

Sean tried watching TNA once and found himself stuck watching looping advertising promos for an older and no longer running show. No comment. He went to their YouTube page where a recent upload is for "Christian Cage Theme Song and Entrance Video (2006)". No comment. The trio wonder how similar it is to his old WWE theme, fitting in to TNA's music guy literally phoning it in by making more rip-off themes than Jimmy Hart.

RD: "Keep your Johnson where it is."

Sean is gracious as RD keeps his number in his little black book for future use.

Robert Sternburg asks about Gorilla Monsoon's toilet technique and the Co-Fruitcakes miss the obvious joke about him being in the Gorilla Position to do so in. (:54) Blade prefers his toilet paper to be sturdy. "I don't want to be the Jim Morrison of wiping, right?" he reasons.

Blade wants to hire out (Hungry Hungry) Ken Patera to swing children around in full nelsons. (:57) RD thinks that should be part of the auction. Blade remembers a magazine wondering if Patera would wrestle Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania IV. Also he recently hung out with Frank From LA.

Goldberg will NOT be inducted into the marketing gimmick Hall Of Fame by Braun the Leprechaun or by my guess of Eric Bischoff, but by Paul Heyman. But of course. (:66) Blade is angered into confusion by this. RD remembers when Bobby Heenan was inducted by Blackjack John Lanza and he absolutely hated it.

RD: "Like we know what we are talking about."

The two wonder who should be celebrity inducted into the Hall Of Fame instead. This is not a repeat from last month when they also did this. (:71)

Blade: "I like to come behind you."

RD wants Burt Reynolds with himself inducting him of course, with his actual Smokey and the Bandit theme (confusing Blade again as it is not Jerry Reed's Eastbound and Down); Herb by Clara Peller or the currently reigning Burger King; and Elvira by Jesse Ventura.

Blade wants Bill Fralic by Stone Cold Austin; Cyndi Lauper by Dave Wolff (since Roddy Piper is no longer with us); and Susan St. James by Mike Adamle. The two wonder how little St. James has been on the radio progrem, as well as Lauper playing nearby Blade opening for Rod Stewart, RD going to see Weird Al perform soon, and Blade having gone to around 20 Misfits concerts. All very...fascinating stuff, no?

Seventeen More Syllables (RD: "Mike Check would be proud"):
Kid Rock Hall Of Fame.
Bob with the bob the bang to
Bang shitty (shitty).

$31.00 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right

...Uh Oh! 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)


  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 5. Patreon, wrestlecrapradio.com, eBay, Dinosaur Dracula, Day of the Dead
  • URLs not taken: 0.
  • SPEAKING OFs: 5. Overstaying the welcome, obscure Nestle news, obscure wrestling news, trouble, concerts
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
  • Phone Calls & Run Ins: 2. Stewart Patrick, Sean Stein

  • Blade Time Outs:  5
  • RD Time Outs:  1
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  1
  • Krankor Laughs: 
  • Weird Al Laughs:  1
  • Mama’s Broken Damn Damn Damn Dishes:  2
  • Cricket Chirps:  3
  • WrestleCrap Gongs:  2
  • RD False Finishes:  1
  • Susan St. James Uh Ohs:  4
  • George!:  4
  • Question of the Week from: Robert Sternburg
    • Do you think Gorilla Monsoon used the bunch method or the folding method when wiping?  I’m a big bunch method guy because I’m scared my fingers will break through the toilet tissue.  Thoughts? Blade: Quad ply or bust for me.
  • WrestleCrap 3 Count:  :  3 celebrities you’d like to see in the WWE Hall of Fame.
    • RD:  Burt Reynolds, Herb From Burger King, Elvira.
    • Blade:  Susan St. James, Cyndi Lauper, Bill Fralic.
  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Apparently, Kid Rock isn’t worthy of induction:
    Kid Rock Hall Of Fame.
    Bob with the bob the bang to
    Bang shitty (shitty).

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