Episode 8: Holy Diamante!: September 19, 2021

Rats Like Cheese
February 3, 1966
"When Mr. Freeze kidnaps a baseball player to make Batman surrender himself in exchange for his revenge, the Caped Crusader agrees to do so."
82 minutes

RD Is Cheering for Mr. Freeze, and he has a "tremendous" Batman and Joker surfing shirt. For some reason Vince's name is now the newly renamed ChannelAttitude.com, and he is wearing a sleeveless shirt to show off his inked arms. 

Vince requests his Co-Bro for some background on Mr. Freeze, of whom RD is Cheering for. RD debates the necessity for canon for fictional works ([insert franchise of choice here]), but in the "normal" version of events as derived from the Animated Series he is trying to rescue his wife Nora through his criminal activity. This Freeze is much different, enough that Vince spoonerisms him as "Timber-Me-Shivers". (Now why wasn't he one of his henchmen?)

Here all of a sudden we have Batman causing Freeze's condition through throwing anti-freeze at him sometime before this episode because apparently that's how such things work. (:05) Vince wonders why they couldn't have spent more of the backstory on the previous episode, and even then the information here is shaky. RD counters that the series was unrelated to the comics overall of the time. But he double checks to protect himself from the geeks, nerds, and poindexters.

Vince also wonders of the episode's weird title. RD reminds him it was spoken by his beloved Princess Sandra, Formerly Sandra Karlson from Brooklyn. He has no idea why he wrote 37 pages of notes.

Anyway, the summation of the previous episode clearly shows the Dynamic Duo's stunt doubles, including the role of Robin now being played by Steve Carrell. (:10) Vince has questions, and this is coming from a guy who oversaw WCW Thunder. RD has to remind him they were not planning for in-depth analysis 55 years later. 

Also we start with random street shots before cutting to a hospital at "midnight...at the Super Hypotherm Deicifier Chamber Mark 7!" Vince asks RD to apologize for missing the police may have saved the frozen Duo. RD thinks it was the Fire Department. (:13) He thinks the two lying frozen on a table reminds him of his old dog Piper relaxing in the sun. 

The attending police officers then randomly mocking the medical attendant named...Vince. He responds with overacting which RD demonstrates.

RD had also noted Gordon praying for "two magnificent specimens of manhood" for your consideration. Vince turns a thawing nob, and the first thing the suddenly dry Duo do is shake each other's hands. O'Hara: "SAINTS BE PRAISED!"

A displeased Mr. Freeze is left to brood in his antarctic lair in the middle of summer. (:20) He threatens Batman to "die...die...DIE!!!". Or he's just saying the German "the" for some reason. Vince wonders if Sanders used this to audition for The Jungle Book and have another take his place. 

Vince knows they next have footage in Dodgers Stadium. The Narrator gushes over the beauty of Princess Sandra, Formerly Sandra Karlson from Brooklyn, about to throw the first pitch. RD admits she has improved her standing in his eyes to a mediocre 5 Batpoles. Vince: "I thought she looked very good." Bruce and folks are there in attendance as she talks about her desire to meet the Duo, "socially of course!" Dick gives Bruce an extremely small package...of peanuts, and Bruce rudely throws the shells on the floor. Vince wished he would have put them in the bag instead. 

Suddenly we hear one of the players, Diamante, is missing "due to reasons". Cue other henchman "Boo" to suddenly skywrite: "Three strikes you're out Batman!" Cue the group having to leave for a "board meeting". Vince would have preferred a distracting scuffle over a foul ball instead.

Freeze calls the police to gloat while the Duo are present and to offer his captured player in exchange for Batman and a 1st round pick: "I don't vant even a mark!" Batman: "Diamante is the idol of millions of impressionable young lads who look up to him. HE MUST LIVE to inspire the youth of today who will become the men of tomorrow!" Vince gives him applause. 

Batman goes off on his own to Freeze. Robin returns to the Batcave where Alfred mixes up giving him tea with a parfait. Mrs. Deal had to remind her husband that he used the wrong name for her the English use "tea" more to reference afternoon snacking rather than just the drink itself. Robin admits he planted a tracking device on his chum, leaving him to be super excited by eating some dessert without Bruce being around to make fun of him. (:35)

Batman shows up at a poorly shot office complex for the trade where he's knocked out and thrown into Freeze's helicopter. When Robin shows up, the Co-Bros are confused by the "ill fitting" sweat pants he is wearing for some reason, perhaps because he stained his tights. 

Freeze holds Batman in a beef locker with the meat still within it. RD wonders why Freeze keeps the rest of his abode at 76 degrees (Fahrenheit...I hope). (:40) RD lives in 70, Vince lives in 72. He relates how in Florida retirement homes they are around 80 degrees in the summer due to saving costs by not using air conditioning. Thus Freeze is of retirement age or thinks others are Florida retirees. Or he's just a jerk. Sadly the temperature is too cold for Batman to fully fight or act against "Cold Fish" Freeze who is waiting to see how his mood will be before he further acts. The Co-Bros express sympathy for his cold plight and making Batman thus know how it feels. So of course Batman doesn't apologize. 

Anyway, Freeze also kidnaps Robin to have for dinner (with Batman). (:46) Freeze states he can put wine into whatever temperature he wants. RD wonders how he could eat or drink frozen or iced stuff then. Freeze then asks for Batman's apology for putting him in his state, of which RD is Cheering for. Of course instead Batman attacks: "We can get you some medical help." Freeze: "IN PRISON?" Robin: "I slipped on the Baked Alaska."

Batman gets Freeze with a punch to the face "right on the button" with the help of "super thermal be long underwear", leaving bare his face. RD wonders if that was the case why he didn't do anything earlier. Vince thinks his smelling the Baked Alaska messed with his head. 

The rest of the fight is boring until Robin finds and pushes a stuffed polar bear on wheels at the grouping. O'Hara doesn't even give an excuse for the police's late show, further proof of Gordon secretly interfering for his own nefarious ends. 

Everyone end parties at a hotel instead of the Stately Wayne Manor, as Diamante reunites with his date Princess Sandra, Formerly Sandra Karlson from Brooklyn, while carrying a baseball. (:57) RD complains that she also had her eye on Bruce as everyone expresses disgust at the Baked Alaska. 

Vince searches for Baked Alaska through a screen share. (:59) RD has to guide his Co-Bro into doing an image search, which is further confused by his using Yahoo instead of Google. 

Vince was most impressed by Freeze and his performance as a villain so far even if gets his name wrong. RD agrees with him. "How did that man not win an Emmy for this?" he asks in all seriousness. The two wonder if they put him in the prison meat locker. 

The two have no memory of next week's villain Zelda the Great, other than the usual jokes nowadays about a certain game series. (:66) Vince goes to "The Google" to check and ends up at a Wikipedia entry. He then looks through some random images. 

RD reiterates with Vince that Freeze is technologically savvy. Vince wonders why his plan for revenge would be complicated with other stuff. RD reminds who is complaining about complexity in storylines before he starts his shilling. (:71) His latest induction is on the now closed WWE Niagara Falls that he once visited to buy a cup from.

  • Special Guest Villain: Mr. Freeze (George Sanders)


  • SPEAKING OFs: 1. Germans
  • Screen Shares: 2. Vince, Vince
  • URLs not taken: 1. VinceRussosNotABadLookingBroad.com

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