131 Year Of Improvements" (The less things change...): January 9, 2009

WrestleCrap Radio Recap
"Year Of Improvements" (The less things change, the more they stay the same.)
75 minutes
by Premier Blah

Because of a friendly bet Farmer Iggy and I made over the Canadiens-Penguins match last month (of which my beloved Habitant won 3-2 thanks to a Andrei "The Giant" Kostitsyn hat-trick), he has to write a recap of his own too, and a nice complimentary one at that also. (That is the one right below this one.) Knowing our track records with this fine radio progrem and the quality of this week in particular...I pity him, I really do.

RD is busy with some 'recent' Waxman report, despite the fact that the report I'm familiar with was released in 2003 and had nothing to do with wrestling at all. Some bad Dixie Carter impressions are made as a result. Sugar. (:03)

[Future Premier - it seems I was slightly wrong about that 'second' Waxman Report. According to derekfz (Derek Franz Zappa no doubt), there actually is is a recent report on wrestling and steroid use - including conversations with Vince Linda and Stephanie - and you can find further documents from the Representative here. Yet another reason why you should never solely trust Wikipedia as your online source. Mr.D if you see this, thank you.]

RD is refocusing himself now on the Radio, delegating Triple Kelly to take his place writing new inductions. While I support it dearly I fear that he may call on ME to take Blade's place for his columns (should he actually update them), a position I fear I'll utterly fail at. (:11) There's also a new hosting site for the WCR episodes, slowly being updated as I speak. RD does his 70's J.Jonah Jameson impression. He should do it like this man. Blade is sober this week for a change. (:16)

Speaking of Waxman, RD and Blade were called on for some sort of related hearing. RD secretly recorded some of it with a wire. Some time is wasted listening to the funky People's Court theme music which excites RD. (:17) Also it's an excuse for Blade to take on the role of "Quentin "Q-Tip" Arnold", questioning the two. We learn the show's 12 Listeners consist of 7 Unibomber-style shack males, 3 shut-ins, 1 deceased and known to be sick, and Robecca DiPietro (who again favorite-d that Car Ad commercial thing again - make up your mind lady!!!).

Our show is "full of wrestling news" which we won't actually get to hear about. (:25) 2009 Gooker voting has begun and the nominations gone over; Vince's Million Dollar Rickrolling Mania, a confusing TNA Love Triangle, Mike Adamle, "Obama" vs. "Clinton", Braden Walker (RD personally wants him to win so he could have him on the show; remember that they did shows together), Divas Championship, Santino vs. Cousin Sal, and the TNA Fish Market Street Fight. Personally my vote is split on Adamle and the MDM. A search for Maryse's photos on wwe.com is made (I know her on MySpace too!), RD thinks of her as greasy. She looks fine to me, you anti-Quebecois mark!

Obscure/Sad News: Lord Littlebrook is ill. The good news is at least he's not suffering from pneumonia. (:36) Blade took a leak next to his son at a strip club. Some smack talk of the Colts and Lions is made. (:41) The Iron Sheik is accepting bookings for public functions to humble you old country way while getting heavily drunk. RD thinks he has a curly penis.

More of the Q-Tip hearing. (:44) The crickets fail a drug test.RD has killed five people last year.

Question of the Week (:53) once more from Ultimate Kennedy (who also sent the two Christmas gifts, that fine man) indirectly brings up the WrestleCrap Carnival. Unfortunately there is no mention of kicking Virgil in the balls.

The new TNA correspondent MegaTrolla marches in with bad sound effects (:59). He cuts to the chase in his first week on the job by not watching TNA at all as he was looking for the Allspark. Still, he's the best TNA correspondent by far. Of course, that's not really saying much.

Some more of the Q-Tip hearing. (:63) Questions of Robecca's fake breasts and phone number make RD suspicious of their questioner. "We cock blocked Mr. Tip!" He defiantly says.

Current News consists solely of Vince returning to TV despite having his legs 'crushed' in that million dollar mess. (:68) RD wants him against Don Mason at Wrestlemania. Vickie Guerrero nudes were posted on wwe.com (and just recently removed too).

Seventeen syllables...to put this episode of WrestleCrap Radio to bed:
Vickie's birthday suit.
We got to see her black box.
Time for Summer's Eve.